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The Retarded Thread: Sploo Needs Attention

  1. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    a grumple bee walks into a bee labaroty where they're making more bees

    the grumple bee says "hi, what's going on here?"

    the grumble bee scientest makers say "nothing."

    the grumple bee says "that's not true, I can see things are happening."

    the grumple bee scientest says "no, you can't"

    and then the grumple bee gets mad and pokes his stinger out and points it at the scientist and says "HRMPHHH!" just like that "HRRRRMPPPHHHHHHHHH~~~~~~ do it in your head lke that HARRMRPPPPH~!~~" he's so mad, the grumble bee, and the scientist has to calm him down

    "bee, grumple bee, it's ok" he says to him, " its FINE." and then, and THEN the scientist says to him, he says "hey I gotta go get you some band aids for your stinger"

    and then then grumple bee is like "whahaaA? my stinger's fine. its my BEE HOLE that hurts.

    (joke ending 1)

    and then the doctor says, "ok, I have a thing for that. I'll BEE right back."
  2. Glokula's Homabla African Astronaut
    I have a bag of 6x strength spice but if I smoke it I'll fail out of college immediately. I have to keep in hidden in my attic for like 3 months for when the semester finishes and it's constantly tempting me to take a hit. =( my life is so hard
  3. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    I had a sack of CRYSTAL METHAMPHETAMINE the other day, but I gave it away to this guy walking down the street that asked me for a cig and I was like "dude, not only do I have a cig, but.. " and i just gave it to him and he did a wry smile and we shook hand and left.
  4. Ghost Black Hole
    I have no drugs. The only thing im high on is love.
  5. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Love is a drug.
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  6. Ghost Black Hole
    My thoughts on legalization; it's gay as fuck.
    You already fucked up making illegal 100 years ago and decide today is the day? What took so long? I was ALREADY going to dispensaries and now they have to shut down.

    The funny part is there isn't any government run dispensaries in my city and the only ones that are supposed to be allowed are government dispensaries so wtf?

    Fuck legalization it's just a cash grab by the media and big biZ

    https://globalnews.ca/news/4562871/pot-store-in-winnipeg-already-sold-out/amp/
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  7. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    At the end of the day I just think it'd be cool to shop in a store for weed. I still in north Dakota here just buy my standard sack from my go to guy, and sometimes I feel bad for HIM when I consider how legal weed will affect his job. Whatever though. The circle of life the ebb and the flow. All good things.
  8. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Vote YES on measure 3.
  9. Ghost Black Hole
    Never forget Eggman

  10. Ghost Black Hole
    Originally posted by mmQ At the end of the day I just think it'd be cool to shop in a store for weed. I still in north Dakota here just buy my standard sack from my go to guy, and sometimes I feel bad for HIM when I consider how legal weed will affect his job. Whatever though. The circle of life the ebb and the flow. All good things.

    It's very cool! I have only been going to dispensaries since I moved to the other side of the country. I live next door to one and theres two more on my street that sell $5 grams of decent shit.

    But apparently they are all shutting down, one of them closed and the other one is having a going out of business sale and the cops have been hanging out in front of the stores spooking customers like STATE ENFORCED CAPITALISM telling people they are only allowed to buy from government operated stores.

    It's a war against private entrepreneurs versus big business and the government instead of gangsters now.
  11. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Ghost It's very cool! I have only been going to dispensaries since I moved to the other side of the country. I live next door to one and theres two more on my street that sell $5 grams of decent shit.

    But apparently they are all shutting down, one of them closed and the other one is having a going out of business sale and the cops have been hanging out in front of the stores spooking customers like STATE ENFORCED CAPITALISM telling people they are only allowed to buy from government operated stores.

    It's a war against private entrepreneurs versus big business and the government instead of gangsters now.

    Are you serious? They're all shitting down? What the fuck you were just telling me about they have literal weed Zvending machines there. This St. ANGERS me.
  12. Ghost Black Hole
    Originally posted by mmQ Are you serious? They're all shitting down? What the fuck you were just telling me about they have literal weed Zvending machines there. This St. ANGERS me.

    Yeah its lame as fuck. They made a bunch of rules that said you have to close your store and apply for a license but if you stayed open you wouldn't be eligable so they all stayed open in protest and now they want to shut them down and only have provincial government run stores or ones that paid the $20,000 license fee or whatever.

    they also have tech pipe vending machines in vancouver
  13. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Haha those look like SCROLLS in thst machine

    Also I'm not as mad now that you clarified it's not literally all the stores. Just some for political bullshit reasoning. At the end of the day, they still remain.
  14. Ghost Black Hole
    for now
  15. Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    I really don't know what to do with my life. Chronic pain, corrections officials and hating most people are my day to day existence. I'm pretty lucky I have so many good things in my life or the shitty things would make me miserable.

    I really hate having to be careful with taking opiates. I haven't taken any for like 2 weeks but goddamn, this is brutal
  16. -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by Sudo Was Jim Henson heavily influenced by LSD? It's hard to imagine he wasn't.

  17. Originally posted by mmQ Haha those look like SCROLLS in thst machine

    Yeah, a different single use spell per scroll.
  18. tee hee hee Naturally Camouflaged [slangily complete this slumberer]
    Originally posted by Ghost Nice gunt


    Heh heh wth!😃
  19. tee hee hee Naturally Camouflaged [slangily complete this slumberer]
    Originally posted by Sudo I really don't know what to do with my life. Chronic pain, corrections officials and hating most people are my day to day existence. I'm pretty lucky I have so many good things in my life or the shitty things would make me miserable.

    I really hate having to be careful with taking opiates. I haven't taken any for like 2 weeks but goddamn, this is brutal

    Religion
  20. CASPER Soldier of Fourchin
    Good god I want to get high. Every time this year. The air starts to chill and the smell of swirling dead leaves and loamy dirt. And I remember sitting on corners sweating through 4 layers of clothing, freezing, shaking, dry heaving and vomiting as discretely as possible at the bus stop in front of the drug store. With your joints all aching and spine feeling like it's been woven through a wheel. You'd think that would make you not want to get high, to go back to that. But that cold air and the smell of leaves is also a crackling bonfire and a cigarette in the night air, and laughter. Cheap domestic beer, and pilfered whiskey from an empty water bottle. The flickering on the faces of good friends who don't exist anymore. And a shy girl who they always teased because her tits were too small, and her ass wasn't big enough....leaning in awkwardly to kiss you on a fire escape. And there was not knowing and uncertainty and that was invigorating. And between then and now feels like an ancient ocean. And I used to love and laugh and fight and felt vibrant and electric and full of words. And now I just feel all scooped out inside, with a big plastic smile carved into my face,appropriately approximating something more human than a gourd. Fuck.
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