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The R'tarded thread: The Shitfucking Edidtion 💩🖕

  1. Solstice Naturally Camouflaged
    Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 Sometimes i stick my hand down my throat and make myself puke after i jerk off to get the sin out of me #justschizophreniathings

    Use the rounded end of a Bic pen wrapped in Saran wrap, you can get way down in there.
  2. Originally posted by The Self Taught Man Had the best idea ever, HUFFTEA.
    Ether, xylene, chloroform, heptane, amyl nitrate in the same bottle sold at 7-11.

    While huffing out of an iced tea bottle I noticed the tea was stuck under the solvent and I could smell it every time I huffed. Its like huffing iced tea and getting drunk.

    Best idea ever "i thohgjt one tiNe wouldnt hurt"
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  3. ..
  4. Needledick Needledick Needledick motherfucker [mulishly down your brachydactylia]
    Vending machine error in my favor; 2 snack items that should be $2.50 each, credit card charged once for 1.50
  5. you should clean it out, theyll call you the snaxm8ster
  6. Solstice Naturally Camouflaged
    Should I take MDMA before I go see The Joker with my friend on Thursday?
  7. WellHung Black Hole (banned)
    U ppl are pathetic lightweights. Y'all simply can't handle ur drugs.
  8. WellHung Black Hole (banned)
    Originally posted by Solstice Should I take MDMA before I go see The Joker with my friend on Thursday?

    Only a faggot would ask this question. It ain't a skirt...so why do u wanna get chummy with cock?
  9. Vitamin G African Astronaut
    Originally posted by WellHung Only a faggot would ask this question. It ain't a skirt…so why do u wanna get chummy with cock?

    What people who haven't done mdma think about mdma
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  10. I wouldn't really want to do it before going to a movie personally, especially one that dark. I was on it when I watched Manchester by the Sea with family and the fact that I was watching a movie made it feel like the dose I took was three times smaller than I actually took.

    The same thing happened when I was watching TV with my friend whom I had the pleasure of introducing Mandy to for his first time earlier, which was an awesome session, we just talked that time and I also gave him a bump of heroin he had never done before either and then he puked and and I felt bad.

    When we were watching TV that later time though his bride was mad that he didn't tell her about it, and she was pissed off while we were watching TV and the whole thing ended really shitty, not that it ever got going really. I have to take over 200mg to get it feeling really good, less than that is kind of a waste I feel.
  11. Originally posted by Vitamin G What people who haven't done mdma think about mdma

    Glad you made it to lunch
  12. aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    is it just me or does Andrew Yang look like a Chinese Nicholas Cage
  13. Vitamin G African Astronaut
    Originally posted by aldra is it just me or does Andrew Yang look like a Chinese Nicholas Cage

    Well now I can't unsee this
  14. I live like a king. Ive washed dishes or done the laundry like once in my life, unclogging a toilet or taking the trash out never, etc.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  15. Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 I live like a king. Ive washed dishes or done the laundry like once in my life, unclogging a toilet or taking the trash out never, etc.

    He a good boy who din do nuffin
  16. Vitamin G African Astronaut
    Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 I live like a king. Ive washed dishes or done the laundry like once in my life, unclogging a toilet or taking the trash out never, etc.

    Thats pretty sad if true. You're a grown man. Least you could do is help your mom with cooking, cleaning, random house chores, and doing your own fucking laundry. Don't you feel embarrassed having your mom fold your tightie whities?
  17. Greenspam African Astronaut
    Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 I live like a king. Ive washed dishes or done the laundry like once in my life, unclogging a toilet or taking the trash out never, etc.

    I'v snaked the toilets of film stars and watched others live like a king

    :(

    Maybe Andrew Yang will change all of this
  18. Originally posted by Vitamin G Don't you feel embarrassed having your mom fold your tightie whities?

    No. Thats the point. I feel kind of embarassed making my mom spend a half hour unclogging the toilet every other day though (Crouton makes me constipated and shit out boulders) so Ive been eating fiber pills to try to not shit like a stone golem. Also I have OCD so doing unclean things makes me panic and my parents understand this. Im sure one day ill find a lovely woman willing to do basic things for me to support her babydaddy since Im like an endless source of free entertainment
  19. Originally posted by Solstice Should I take MDMA before I go see The Joker with my friend on Thursday?

    both
  20. Vitamin G African Astronaut
    Originally posted by frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 No. Thats the point. I feel kind of embarassed making my mom spend a half hour unclogging the toilet every other day though (Crouton makes me constipated and shit out boulders) so Ive been eating fiber pills to try to not shit like a stone golem. Also I have OCD so doing unclean things makes me panic and my parents understand this. Im sure one day ill find a lovely woman willing to do basic things for me to support her babydaddy since Im like an endless source of free entertainment

    Fiber is not going to help with that. Crouton is loaded with fiber. More fiber =/= perfect shits. More fiber = firmer shits. You're just compounding the issue, try taking magnesium citrate instead. It's what all the brainsmart opioid addicts do.

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