I think my roommate is a prostitute

1. 2019-10-16 at 2:04 AM UTC

   #1
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   I've only seen it once in passing and once when it was really dark and on the stairs so didn't wanna chat much when we were both trying to pass each other, it's name is Cheng or something similarly Asian so I can't tell by the name, but it takes like I'm not joking 10 baths (I think they're baths and not showers) a day, and I hear what I think might be other people going in and out of its room all night long and I think it's nocturnal, which again, hooker.
   
   Both times I seen it it looked like a girl to me, especially when we were face to face in the dark, but my landlady insists there's no women here at the time.
   
   I think it looks hot whatever it is, good chance it's a tranny, I think that's most likely, but I really hope it is actually a woman but even if it's not I'll totally let it suck if it's a tranny at least.
   
   Oh yeah, and last night I heard it moaning when I used its bathroom in the middle of the night which I usually don't do, so that's when all the stars added up for me.
2. 2019-10-16 at 2:15 AM UTC

   #2
   

   Speedy Parker Black Hole
   How do you not know your roommate?
   The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

   • aldra
3. 2019-10-16 at 2:18 AM UTC

   #3
   frumbob 🐎🦄🐈🐯🐷🦊 African Astronaut
   Hit on her by talking about your brain and then touch her hair without asking
4. 2019-10-16 at 2:35 AM UTC

   #4
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole

   Originally posted by Speedy Parker How do you not know your roommate?

   
   because i never see her because she's a nocturnal postitute
   
   and ive only lived here a few days
5. 2019-10-16 at 2:50 AM UTC

   #5
   

   the man who put it in my hood Black Hole [miraculously counterclaim my golf]
   Is she cute
6. 2019-10-16 at 2:51 AM UTC

   #6
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   Roomate, as in you live together in the same unit? Or is it like a neighbor? I find it hard to believe you live with someone and don't know their gender.
7. 2019-10-16 at 2:52 AM UTC

   #7
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   qt
8. 2019-10-16 at 2:53 AM UTC

   #8
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   She probably has a Triad pimp so be careful.
9. 2019-10-16 at 2:53 AM UTC

   #9
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   yeah, i dont know gont, shes from china or something and is a grad student (i think) by day, and a nocturnal hooker by night, SHE DOESNT HAVE MUCH TIME TO WATCH SOCCER AND BAKE COOKIES
   
   and im a undergrad by day and a full time uber driver by day also so I DONT HAVE MUCH TIME TO BAKE COOKIES Either gMoME DSAYIN
10. 2019-10-16 at 2:56 AM UTC

    #10
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    Cookies take like 10 minutes to make. Not that you'd want to eat any once you're high on meth.
11. 2019-10-16 at 2:57 AM UTC

    #11
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    i made biscuits today and ate 1 and a half and put the rest in the fridge
12. 2019-10-16 at 2:58 AM UTC

    #12
    

    the man who put it in my hood Black Hole [miraculously counterclaim my golf]
    Eat her ass
13. 2019-10-16 at 2:59 AM UTC

    #13
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    fuck no, shes chinese she has worms in there
    
    suck my dick
14. 2019-10-16 at 3 AM UTC

    #14
    

    the man who put it in my hood Black Hole [miraculously counterclaim my golf]
    Worms are cool
15. 2019-10-16 at 4:38 PM UTC

    #15
    

    Speedy Parker Black Hole

    Originally posted by DietPiano because i never see her because she's a nocturnal postitute
    
    and ive only lived here a few days

    
    Did you just move in without talking to her?
16. 2019-10-16 at 10:35 PM UTC

    #16
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by Speedy Parker Did you just move in without talking to her?

    
    I've met everyone plenty except her
    
    
    Seriously, the cadence is door slam, bathroom, tub, snort, bathroom, snort, tub, door slam, door slam, snort, tub, tub, snort, bathroom, door slam, tub all night long every night
    
    I havent caught her yet though because I don't live on that floor
17. 2019-10-17 at 2:13 AM UTC

    #17
    

    Speedy Parker Black Hole

    Originally posted by DietPiano I've met everyone plenty except her
    
    
    Seriously, the cadence is door slam, bathroom, tub, snort, bathroom, snort, tub, door slam, door slam, snort, tub, tub, snort, bathroom, door slam, tub all night long every night
    
    I havent caught her yet though because I don't live on that floor

    
    What are you living in? A Habitrail?
18. 2019-10-17 at 3:02 AM UTC

    #18
    

    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Post nudes.
19. 2019-10-17 at 3:03 AM UTC

    #19
    

    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    ... OF ROOMMATE, not yourself (no offense).
20. 2019-10-17 at 3:04 AM UTC

    #20
    

    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Wait, why do you refer to her as "it"?