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Malice's Autopsy Report
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2019-03-19 at 3:19 PM UTC
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2019-03-19 at 3:22 PM UTCI'm surprised his brain wasn't remarkably damaged.
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2019-03-19 at 3:28 PM UTC
Originally posted by GGG Just because his brain was physically normal does not mean it was normal when he was alive, right? I haven't looked at the autopsy report in full yet but there's no way they could like, MRI that shit. Like if he was schizo for example, i dont think that would've shown.
Don't think it's fair to imply that there was nothing wrong with malice. He suffered from some weird and intense social problems at the very least and idk if I believe that you can totally construct that kind of prison. I mean towards the end he was actually having psychotic episodes it seemed.
Yeah I'm pretty sure they just meant physiologically, structurally normal.
There would've had to be electrical activity and blood in it to be able to do whatever the EEG/ MRI scans, etc.
We're not saying that there was nothing wrong with him. He was pretty severely disabled, socially, developmentally.
But I shared like 80% of the symptoms and impairments that he had. 13 years of addiction, isolation, unemployment, no friends, no intellectual cultivation - absolutely CRIPPLED me. As I mentioned before,I bought my first gun years ago for the EXPRESS purpose of killing myself. I just wanted the comfort of knowing I had that option if and when I got to my breaking point and had the guts to pull the trigger.
But roughly a year later, after taking pretty minor steps to make things better (stopping heroin for medicine assisted treatment, work, social integration, diet, exercise), pretty much all of that reversed itself. Im still not perfect, but I'd say I'm 70% or so back to my baseline functioning.
The part that bothers me most, is that he didn't want to take those most lazy, rudimentary steps to get better. It was more reasonable to his mind to eat a bunch of random powders and inject vials of Chinese testosterone, and eventually kill himself....than it was to....try to make a friend. Volunteer. Find meaning. Get a job.
Suicide would've always been an option.
But in his mind, it was easier to kill himself than to TRY anything. I can't even wrap my head around that fully. I mean...I sort of get it. When I was depressed, taking a shower more than once every 3 days seemed like an abso,use chore. I mean I was barely leaving the house so who gives a shit. I get why minor things would seem like so much work. But it'd almost be laughable if it weren't so sad.
"So....I'm supposed to start...talking to my family? And going out in public? And buy a dog? And volunteer at a shelter a couple times a month....with homeless people? With their dirty, unwashed hands? And that's going to fix my life? Ehhhhhhhhh..... nah I'm good on that"
*BLAM*The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-03-19 at 5:20 PM UTC
Originally posted by CASPER Fucking this.
I'm really tempted to compile every Malice post I can find, going back years….and mail it to his father.
You'll find one post by me where I joked he had a one-inch dick, but he's the one who first posted he had a one-inch dick, so I'm split about feeling guilty or not. -
2019-03-19 at 5:21 PM UTC
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2019-03-19 at 5:25 PM UTC
Originally posted by Grylls is that it?
no smoke and mirrors?
That's the one time I "insulted" him. He said he was going to kill himself, and I said, why, because you've got a one-inch dick? But like I said, he already shared this detail with everyone. I just figured he was attention-whoring, like so many others have in the past, so I didn't take him seriously. He had also posted publicly in the past that he was going to kill himself, but then didn't, so I just figured he was crying wolf. -
2019-03-19 at 5:28 PM UTCI personally blame SpectraL IN WHOLE for the death of our beloved Malice. Had you not made that dick joke, he'd probably still be alive. It was your post that pushed him over the edge.
edit: hydro is a shit motherThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-03-19 at 5:28 PM UTCyeah he should feel responsible for this, faggot
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2019-03-19 at 5:30 PM UTCI think we're going to need grief/shock councilors and perhaps a quiet place or two to reflect.
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2019-03-19 at 5:49 PM UTCIt suddenly occurred to me, what if I have a suicidal PM from Malice that I didn't bother reading or replying to, so, with a certain amount of dread, I opened up my PMs and he wasn't there. Too close for comfort.
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2019-03-19 at 5:53 PM UTC
Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson Easy to say when you only know one side of it, and Malice was an adult not a kid…Guilt tripping the parents of an adult for his actions/decisions is pretty gay.
Yeah that's true. It's only gay though if they actually put the effort into raising him. Is it so hard to believe that someone I this day and age would be a lazy shifty parent? Especially to a special needs kid? Children rarely get as cynical and depressed as he did without the parents doing some pretty major shit wrong.
Still...doesn't mean J isn't responsible. -
2019-03-19 at 5:57 PM UTC
Originally posted by -SpectraL That's the one time I "insulted" him. He said he was going to kill himself, and I said, why, because you've got a one-inch dick? But like I said, he already shared this detail with everyone. I just figured he was attention-whoring, like so many others have in the past, so I didn't take him seriously. He had also posted publicly in the past that he was going to kill himself, but then didn't, so I just figured he was crying wolf.
Yeah I wouldn't read too much into that. He was talking about killing himself for like....6 years? More?
I legitimately thought he was alive and just being a dramatic Faggot this whole time, until I stumbled on the report.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-03-19 at 6:02 PM UTC
Originally posted by CASPER Yeah that's true. It's only gay though if they actually put the effort into raising him. Is it so hard to believe that someone I this day and age would be a lazy shifty parent? Especially to a special needs kid? Children rarely get as cynical and depressed as he did without the parents doing some pretty major shit wrong.
Still…doesn't mean J isn't responsible.
From his stories, they were pretty damn shitty and neglectful towards him. I remember he said once that he never had a real conversation with them. They treated him like an obligation, not a child who needs love and nurturing. -
2019-03-19 at 6:08 PM UTCHe was a full grown man. He made his choice himself. What he did was selfish and cruel to the people who cared about him. He took the easy road, but it was all about himself. Life isn't about what you can do for you, it's about what you can do for others, and what you can do to make this stinking world a better place. 6,316 people die every hour. That's 105 per minute or 2 per second. There's enough death in the world without helping to create more.
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2019-03-19 at 6:49 PM UTCTell us SpectraL, what do you do to make the world a better place? Who have you helped?The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-03-19 at 7:03 PM UTCOne of you guys actually did βit?β
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2019-03-19 at 7:08 PM UTC
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2019-03-19 at 7:09 PM UTC
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2019-03-19 at 7:23 PM UTCRest in peace.
I only corresponded with him a couple times, but I occasionally thought about some of the stuff he'd said over the years. Just kinda weird he was so casual about some of the stuff he said he did. The thing with the cat wasn't even really as weird to me as the fact he was so comfortable being a shut-in, not talking or socializing with anyone. He was intelligent, for sure. Kind of a waste. But he'll no longer have to deal with the pain of being alive. Getting sick, depressed, all that crap. Never have to end up in a nursing home being abused/buttraped by niggers, etc.
It's strange I can relate to so many people from totse that seemed so weird. I'm weird in different ways but somehow I valued their opinions and posts.
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2019-03-19 at 7:33 PM UTCThis is sad. I'd say this has happened many times to people. Someone feeling sub human because there's no real connection in their lives. Hope he feels a connection wherever he's at now.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
