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What keeps YOU from getting on that bus?
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2018-12-12 at 9:10 PM UTC
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2018-12-12 at 9:11 PM UTC
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2018-12-12 at 9:13 PM UTC
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2018-12-12 at 9:14 PM UTCIt’s getting pretty homo in here.
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2018-12-12 at 9:15 PM UTCAS my old choir master used to say "It's only homo if you cuddle after".
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2018-12-12 at 9:15 PM UTC
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2018-12-12 at 9:16 PM UTC
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2018-12-12 at 9:17 PM UTCWould you two please cross swords then post it?
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2018-12-12 at 9:21 PM UTCGo commit die
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2018-12-12 at 9:33 PM UTC
Originally posted by Ghost Wow how dumb do you have to be to take prozac for OCD. You got sold snake oil by a big pharma shill.
I live in Canada. Does not compute.
Originally posted by Ghost Non psychoactive cannabis oil works better anyways
I'm actually going to try this. Psychoactive cannabis compounds my OCD/anxiety symptoms exponentially, but if there's truly non-high enducing cannabis oil out there, and it has some beneficial pharmacological effects, I am definitely down for giving it a try. -
2018-12-12 at 9:41 PM UTC
Originally posted by WellHung The downside is that high doses end up 'zombifying' you… you end up being too flat. It sucks, but perhaps get back on the Medication Carousel and get back to trial and error and Hopefully you'll find something better, eventually. Or, you could get a pill cutter and keep reducing your daily medication dosage by 5mg until you reach a proper therapeutic dose for your body chemistry. You will know what dose that is, subjectively, intuitively, when you achieve it 👍
I would 'Thank' this post twice if I could.
While I have contemplated getting off the meds (tapering, to reduce withdrawal effects), I only ever thought of it as a shaky correlation assumption (i.e. I think my depression has gotten worse since they put me on anti-depressants (and I still get a kick out of that irony), but I'm not quite sure, so it's something I can consider among many options).
But I never really considered the possible mechanism of action behind it. And maybe that's precisely the issue. It's flattened my affect to the point that I lost all the motivation I once had in life, and reduced my high's as well and not just my low's.
But I always figured that was more a Lithium thing. I was actually prescribed Lithium like 15 years ago when psychiatrists thought I might be bipolar (one even said schizoaffective - it's like bipolar with a dash of schizophrenia symptoms thrown in). Now that was a medication I couldn't stand taking for long.
I actually have a long history of stopping any psychiatric medications.
I'm 34 now and this round of a treatment attempt is by far the longest one I've stuck with (close to two years now).
I really do need to think through the psychiatric medication angle quite a bit more though.
So thank you, because that was another blind spot I had for some reason and you've helped bring it to light. -
2018-12-12 at 9:46 PM UTCThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-12-12 at 9:47 PM UTCYou'll be happy of that snake oil/venom when a water moccasin bites your ass.
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2018-12-12 at 9:56 PM UTC
Originally posted by CASPER I also acknowledge that I've barely given life a shot. I know I'm capable of finishing school. I know I'm capable of running a business. I know I have more than average empathy for people, and I genuinely like helping people. I know at the very least I'm above average intelligence wise. For all his rhetoric, malice refused to engage with life and people around him, and take the steps needed to live a fulfilling life. Then again his brain chemistry was kinda fucked too.
Yeah I've noticed some people kinda throw in the towel a bit too easily. And the brain chemistry thing has far-reaching implications like free will, predestination, nature vs nurture, etc. There is no way to know exactly what another person is going through at any given moment. Human personality and consciousness are highly complex.
It's one of the reasons I get really annoyed with the stern "anti-suicide / anti-euthanasia" crowd. How can you possibly know with any certainty what another person is going through?
But I do like your optimism and that you acknowledge your strengths. Definitely put them to use, and in a variety of ways, before you even start thinking about throwing in the towel / boarding the bus.
Originally posted by CASPER Idk. There's a Remington 870 and a box of #4 shot shells in my closet. There's that lingering feeling that I might be okay again, and that if I dont wait long enough, I might miss out. But if there comes a day where I'm fairly certain that's no longer the case, I'll rent a car, pack up my stuff, find a quiet spot somewhere with a view, wrap a towel and a tarp around my head and duct tape it there (since it seems so selfish to leave that gross mess for someone to have to clean up), and punch my ticket. And it won't be a sad thing. It'll just mean I'm too tired to do this anymore. But mostly I think people who are this depressed just don't have the energy to Do the things that will actually make you happy.
The fact that you have an effective method thought out and the essential resources to end your life, and have gone this far without, I think shows tremendous resilience.
I'm not much on guns, and living in Canada, it's not a very common thing for your typical Canadian citizen to own one, but I can't help but imagine if I had one lying around, that I'd probably have used it by now, probably while under the influence of some drug or another (most likely alcohol with that 'liquid courage').
Originally posted by CASPER As shortlived as it was, just spending nights in bed with the girl I was with, and talking about kids and life and being a weird introverted kid…did wonders for my headspace. It's so easy to feel disconnected and inhuman and unhappy when you're disconnected and out of touch with everything around you. I've come to understand that happiness isn't something you just stumble into. It's lazy and selfish and natural to feel this way. But health and happiness is something you have to actively work towards and I think that's what Malice just couldn't wrap his head around. He was so furious at the injustice of life, like an incel furious at the world at large. But the truth was, he didn't try. I tried to connect with him. Others did too. It was too much effort for him.
You touch on an interesting point that I myself was considering making, but wasn't sure how much incels are understood and/or empathized with around here.
Most of my best memories involve love, romance, affection, and so on. Those are the ones that keep me around.
It's why I kinda get where a lot of the incel rage and hopelessness comes from.
If you've never experienced happiness, it seems perfectly reasonable to assume that you never will.
So yeah, brains are complex machines, and I really appreciate the fact that you are aware of that and can embrace that level of empathy for someone like Malice.
Keep on keepin' on, and best of luck to you going forward. -
2018-12-12 at 9:57 PM UTCGoing to see psychiatrist tomorrow whoopThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-12-12 at 10:01 PM UTC
Originally posted by HTS I live in Canada too. Prescriptions aren't covered. Snake oil is still SOLD. For profit. >:(
Yeah, I guess prescriptions are kind of a grey area.
For the past few years I've been either unemployed or underemployed, so my low enough income status would cover most drugs. Once I was prescribed some exotic throat medication after I got something after kissing a hooker on the mouth (now I understand the common warning), and I had to pay for it because it wasn't covered.
Now I have a decent job with all the benefits, so I'm back to having my (at least, my day-to-day) medications covered.
But ultimately, yes, big pharma does still benefit. They get paid either way. -
2018-12-12 at 11:42 PM UTC
Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson But not OCD..that's one of those made up ailments like ADD and such. Back in my day a good kicking fixed those things.
Yeah I agree it's a 'made up' ailment to sell shitty drugs to millions of people but you're fucked. You don't agree with smoking weed and you don't believe in fake mental disorders but you think people should still take pills for it? Thats retarded. You're a quack and you don't know the first thing about modern medicine or brain chemistry.
If you had no problem with someone smoking weed to treat their OCD/anxiety whatever I wouldn't care but who in the hell doesn't believe in broad spectrum DSM classifications and still thinks weed should be illegal. You are the most boring lame person that ever exists. -
2018-12-12 at 11:59 PM UTCLife is worth living and it's not like I'm going to miss the bus.
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2018-12-13 at 12:23 AM UTCI gotta know what happens next. I'm NEVER dying!
Also, the way my life plays out I'll eventually want to die and be unable to. -
2018-12-13 at 2:01 AM UTC
