2024-11-19 at 8:46 AM UTC
Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
He's probably just not adjusting to the pressure.
>mfw dad jokes.
Or maybe when he stops the jokes. Not sure. Haven't pushed him that far yet. (he's scary)
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
favorite dad joke:
why you don't spend time with me ya deadbeat piece of shit!
favorite mom joke:
Ya mom so old her social security is one.
2024-11-19 at 7:02 PM UTC
I don't entirely remember but I did wake up yelling "SHES A FAT LYING FUCKING CUNT" or something along those lines.
2024-11-28 at 9:25 AM UTC
Instigator
Naturally Camouflaged
[the staring tame crusher]
Dreams I was rollerblading last night
Which can only mean one thing... I want to fuck Arnold schrwazenneger
2024-12-27 at 3:40 AM UTC
Rainy night. Large Children's adventure playground, red and yellow. Family went there just for food. Business wasn't doing well. Owner was a creep. My mum told me to go look for my dad, that he'd gone upstairs to where there was a few slot machines and smoking area. He wasn't there but I did notice the owner behaving strangely. He had a black eye. I used my innocence and flattery to drag a confession from him, he had murdered my dad. Everyone in the restaurant had been poisoned with computer dust. I looked around and they were gone. Gone to throw up in the bathrooms. I ran upstairs looking for my mum and sister. There were way too many toilet cubicles. I found Akira in one and hid her behind a curtain, dead girls in all the others. My sister in one, she looked unwell and I could only get a response by saying I was taking her cigarettes. I whispered her to stay quiet and stay where she was. A few women came into the bathroom dressed clowny. Some sick women neared them as did I, though I wasn't sick. I hadn't eaten anything. The woman chose who would join the team to work at the place, which including me, and instantly they started electrocution them, ECT, I ran and hid in a stall, just didn't breathe and hoped the wouldn't find me and that they would think my sister dead.
2024-12-27 at 3:52 AM UTC
Grimace
motherfucker
[my enumerable hindi guideword]
It was partly sexual. Partly horror. I was about to have sex with a girl, I think? I was extremely hard and this girl was lying next to me, but not on me, and was rubbing my chest. I was extremely aroused. Suddenly, the mood shifted and she went away and I found myself in a dark house and I was alone. I was scared, so I called out, and I just heard my voice echo echo. So I got up to run and some long-haired, twisted figure flew at me, screaming, and I woke up in terror, screaming out.
I have found that I have nightmares more often if I eat hot dogs or hot dog things before bed. Like "lil smokies" or "pigs in a blanket"
2024-12-27 at 4:24 AM UTC
I dreamed every illegal in America turned into a used diaper in the streets of sanctuary cities.
2024-12-27 at 5:04 AM UTC
Human DNA is found in 80% of hotdogs.
2024-12-27 at 4:19 PM UTC
What does people taste like?
2024-12-27 at 5:01 PM UTC
I actually don't even remember what pork tastes like
