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Crazy Glue in Dick
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2017-06-18 at 1:44 PM UTC
Originally posted by infinityshock edit: godammit, why the fuck do image links never work on this piece of shit site
fuck this.
The beginning of the URL between the [img tags must begin with http://, and the end of the entire URL must end with either .jpg, .gif, .png or .bmp. http://www.imgur.com/uploads/pic123.jpg.012345 will not work. Also, some sites use a unique identifier within the URL, which changes over time, so as to prevent hotlinking. So if the URL looks like http://www.imgur.com/photos/uploads/pic7#nGkC987654321.jpg, then it's probably unusable for hotlinking, because that address will not remain the same for that pic for very long, or will not display for a user other than yourself. Just trying to help. -
2017-06-18 at 1:47 PM UTCAdditionally you can also just not be an absolute dipshit and post the image the same way you've posted other, working images in the past.
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-06-18 at 1:57 PM UTC
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2017-06-18 at 2:01 PM UTCShe said, ‘Don’t touch that.’
‘What is it?’ I asked.
‘It’s glue,’ she said. ‘Special glue. The best kind.’
‘What did you buy it for?’
‘Because I need it,’ she said. ‘A lot of things around here need gluing.’
‘Nothing around here needs gluing,’ I said. ‘I wish I understood why you buy all this stuff.’
‘For the same reason I married you,’ she murmured. ‘To help pass the time.’
I didn’t want to fight, so I kept quiet, and so did she.
‘Is it any good, this glue?’ I asked. She showed me the picture on the box, with this guy hanging upside-down from the ceiling.
‘No glue can really make a person stick like that,’ I said. ‘They just took the picture upside-down. They must have put a lamp on the floor.’ I took the box from her and peered at it. ‘And there, look at the window. They didn’t even bother to hang the blinds the other way. They’re upside down, if he’s really standing on the ceiling. Look,’ I said again, pointing to the window. She didn’t look.
‘It’s eight already,’ I said. ‘I’ve got to run.’ I picked up my briefcase and kissed her on the cheek. ‘I’ll be back pretty late. I’m working—’
‘Overtime,’ she said. ‘Yes, I know.’
I called Abby from the office.
‘I can’t make it today,’ I said. ‘I’ve got to get home early.’
‘Why?’ Abby asked. ‘Something happen?’
‘No … I mean, maybe. I think she suspects something.’
There was a long silence. I could hear Abby’s breathing on the other end.
‘I don’t see why you stay with her,’ she whispered. ‘You never do anything together. You don’t even fight. I’ll never understand it.’ There was a pause, and then she repeated, ‘I wish I understood.’ She was crying.
‘I’m sorry. I’m sorry, Abby. Listen, someone just came in,’ I lied. ‘I’ve got to hang up. I’ll come over tomorrow. I promise. We’ll talk about everything then.’
I got home early. I said ‘Hi’ as I walked in, but there was no reply. I went through all the rooms in the house. She wasn’t in any of them. On the kitchen table I found the tube of glue, completely empty. I tried to move one of the chairs, to sit down. It didn’t budge. I tried again. Not an inch. She’d glued it to the floor. The fridge wouldn’t open. She’d glued it shut. I didn’t understand what was happening, what would make her do such a thing. I didn’t know where she was. I went into the living-room to call her mother’s. I couldn’t lift the receiver; she’d glued that too. I kicked the table and almost broke my toe. It didn’t even budge.
And then I heard her laughing. It was coming from somewhere above me. I looked up, and there she was, standing barefoot on the living room ceiling.
I stared openmouthed. When I found my voice I could only ask, ‘What the hell… are you out of your mind?’
She didn’t answer, just smiled. Her smile seemed so natural, with her hanging upside-down like that, as if her lips were just stretching on their own by the sheer force of gravity.
‘Don’t worry, I’ll get you down,’ I said, hurrying to the shelf and grabbing the largest books. I made a tower of encyclopedia volumes and clambered on top of the pile.
‘This may hurt a little,’ I said, trying to keep my balance. She went on smiling. I pulled as hard as I could, but nothing happened. Carefully, I climbed down.
‘Don’t worry,’ I said. ‘I’ll get the neighbours or something. I’ll go next door and call for help.’
‘Fine,’ she laughed. ‘I’m not going anywhere.’
I laughed too. She was so pretty, and so incongruous, hanging upside-down from the ceiling that way. With her long hair dangling downwards, and her breasts moulded like two perfect teardrops under her white T-shirt. So pretty. I climbed back up onto the pile of books and kissed her. I felt her tongue on mine. The books tumbled out from under my feet, but I stayed floating in midair, hanging just from her lips.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-06-18 at 2:12 PM UTCAw damn it. Here I thought you wrote that yourself and I was very impressed.
I'll leave the thanks because it still made me smile, I guess.
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-06-18 at 2:14 PM UTCWhat you do is get a bucket of Krazy Glue and pour it on the guy's head and then stick his entire face to a brick wall. Press firmly for about 20 seconds. Done. Sit back and watch the passers-by marvel.
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2017-06-18 at 4:45 PM UTC
Originally posted by -SpectraL It's just a topic of discussion, retard. Stop trying to see elephants in the clouds.
Awww, Speccy, you butthurt I called out your homo-erotic extreme torture fetish? You know damned well I'm not retard. I'm the bitch who'd be saving your ass when you actually do stick crazy glue up your dick, you old senile faggot.
When I think about evil acts, I usually have a person in mind for it. I'm not really an evil person, but I do have an evil streak when someone crosses me in a bad way, is why I asked.
Originally posted by infinityshock go shoot up in a crack house, junkie whore.
LMFAO, that the best you got? You wanted to rip on me, and I shot you down, and shut you up, bitch, and this is all you can retort back to me? Man, I'm disappointed. I thought you had more in you than that, you small-dicked little boy. Man, I fucking love it, like I really, really fucking love it when I can shoot retarded faggots, such as you, down. You always are so cocky, and know it fucking all, but you know shit. You're one of those faggots who try to talk a good talk, but you cant walk the walk, bitch. Whether I'm shooting dope or not, I will always fuck you up in a debate involving medicine.
Come on now, get on your knees and suck my 12 inch e-cock, faggot. I've essentially slapped you in the face with it already. I pray someone glues your urethra one day just so you can think of me when the doctor puts that needle in your abdomen so you can think of me. -
2017-06-18 at 5:01 PM UTC
Originally posted by hydromorphone Awww, Speccy, you butthurt I called out your homo-erotic extreme torture fetish? You know damned well I'm not retard. I'm the bitch who'd be saving your ass when you actually do stick crazy glue up your dick, you old senile faggot.
When I think about evil acts, I usually have a person in mind for it. I'm not really an evil person, but I do have an evil streak when someone crosses me in a bad way, is why I asked.
LMFAO, that the best you got? You wanted to rip on me, and I shot you down, and shut you up, bitch, and this is all you can retort back to me? Man, I'm disappointed. I thought you had more in you than that, you small-dicked little boy. Man, I fucking love it, like I really, really fucking love it when I can shoot retarded faggots, such as you, down. You always are so cocky, and know it fucking all, but you know shit. You're one of those faggots who try to talk a good talk, but you cant walk the walk, bitch. Whether I'm shooting dope or not, I will always fuck you up in a debate involving medicine.
Come on now, get on your knees and suck my 12 inch e-cock, faggot. I've essentially slapped you in the face with it already. I pray someone glues your urethra one day just so you can think of me when the doctor puts that needle in your abdomen so you can think of me.
youre too stupid to leave well enough alone and want to be spanked like the naughty little bitch you are. instead of thanking me for leaving you a cordial derogatory comment you want me to berate you further by pointing out your full-retard level of posting idiocy. it all makes sense now...youre a she-version of HTS with your masochistic fantasies of being publicly berated and humiliated.
so be it. -
2017-06-18 at 5:02 PM UTC
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2017-06-18 at 6:02 PM UTC
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2017-06-18 at 6:32 PM UTCIf the dick was hard when you filled it with super glue, the pain of trying to shrink back would be unimaginable.
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2017-06-18 at 6:38 PM UTCdont flatter yourself, you gibbering dope fiend. i wouldnt get anywhere near any of your orifices even with full MOPP 8 gear. those veritable biosafety level-5 petri dishes of exotic and as-yet undiscovered STDs slathering around up in there are not anything i want to experience.
normally ill tell posters who delve into my areas of expertise to just stop posting so i dont have to make them look fucking retarded for the stupid shit they post, but in your case...carry on. keep posting stupid ass shit so i can merrily berate you and point out how utterly clueless you are...because you know you get off on it. im satisfied with simply saying 'stfu you stupid whore' and leaving your ignorance at that, but since you enjoy getting your self-admitted-to e-peen smashed with my pile driver...bring it.
your athletic abilities is fogged by those high levels of various opioids and hallucinogens being forced across your blood-brain barrier. i clearly stated in my post that bypassing a blockage in a male urethra would be simpler because, as you obviously dont know, the majority of a males urethra is external, while with a female the opposite is the case. as a matter of fact...the entire urethra in a female is internal. access to the female urethra for any degree of exploratory surgery would require full surgical setups while with a male...not so much.
the main reason the extent of my original reply to your post was a short and sweet derogatory comment was due to you considering the practice of livestock care following over into human medical treatment. the absurdity of that assumption is hilarious. there is no follow over. none. yea, ive done it...ive used a 20-something gauge hypo to pump a rabbit or two full of penicillin...and the thought process is straightforward and uncomplicated. if something goes wrong and bunny dies...oh well. buy a new one. farmer john pumping his goats up with various feed-store grade antibiotics and other treatments is a fucking astronomical order of magnitude away from the years...decades even...required to SAFELY treat a human patient in the degree your asserting to. a human life. every action has to be taken into consideration then what reactions could occur...then the reactions to those reactions...ad infinitum. its ludicrous that you consider cramming a fucking needle into a farm animal...on a driveway...on a farm...as any sort of example to reply to my berating you for the idiocy of commencing a massively invasive procedure on a human being when it may not even be necessary, considering other factors. i know hospitals arent the most sanitary of environments but there are regulations and procedures they follow to keep the environment as clean as reasonable. do you know the level of microbial activity on a farm compared to any other 'normal' environment? go web search it. its almost as volatile of a biohazard as that shit-stew swishing around in that cock socket between your legs.
you can buy any veterinary materials required to treat an animal with no license, no government-sanctioned prescription, or even an ID in most cases (not counting drugs that can be used for recreational human consumption, obviously) at a farm store than sells assorted feed stock and live animals. that includes hypos, veterinary surgical equipment, AND 'drugs'...meaning growth hormones, antibiotics, yadda yadda. [side note...on some 'survivalist' boards im on there are entire threads about what veterinary products can be used to treat humans. these fucking idiots think because they can get cheaper items without a prescription they are better off than buying the same/similar items that require a prescription so they can add it to their stockpiles for more bang for their buck.] the prices are exponentially cheaper than the same/similar item intended for human-use for the simple fact that there are far more stringent safety, health, and QC procedures undertaken on the human-use items. example...a batch of xxxxx-vaccine is produced at xxxxx-labs. woops. it was accidentally contaminated at some point in the production process with xxxx-microbe that would result in mortality to 20% of the patients (animal or human) that it was delivered to. in human-use products various inspections and QC measures would detect the contamination and remove the product from possibility of marketing. (more likely theyd actually sell it grey-market to africa, india, or china. not kidding.) animal-use products have nowhere near as strict safety protocols.
you said there was no infection to occur. shows how much you know about microbiology, you fucking idiot. unless the procedure was undertaken in a complete vacuum where the patient was dead and had been exposed to ultra-high levels of radiation for long periods of time...there were microbes present. toxic. microbes. look at any sanitizing liquid...every single one clearly states that it will kill 99.xxxx% of germs. not one single biocide in existence claims it will eliminate 100% of infectious organisms. so...no...there is always the potential for infection when an invasive procedure is undertaken.
the hilarious part is...you dont even grasp the concept of, for all the time and effort expended to undertake your idiotic invasive procedure...the same, or even less, time and effort could be more effectively expended by eliminating the blockage that is the problem in the first place...then not having a fucking punctured abdomen or bladder. that is part of your problem...you dont see the big picture. your drug addled mind cant comprehend variables beyond 2...maybe 3...degrees of separation in a process. medical treatment isnt an A then B then C then D then E process the way you try to simplistically spell it out. medical treatment is a flow chart...one that looks like the map of a large city from orbit with so many variables it takes years to even begin to obtain any degree of proficiency. the only reason youre so infatuated with needles and making them the first course of treatment is because yes, i concur that is your area of expertise due to your well-practiced fondness for pumping yourself...and other junkies...full of one sort of injectable opiate or another.
i wish there were a real post-med skool doctor on this site who could also berate you idiocy so i dont have to keep doing it.
i also wish i could post a few tidbits of my CV relating to my medical knowledge and experience but that would involve posting RL pics and i really dont give enough of a shit about your to expend that degree of effort.
now stfu you clueless gibbering crackwhore needle fetishist, and go back to your crack house and pump yourself full of some sort of hopefully contaminated opiod. -
2017-06-18 at 6:44 PM UTC
Originally posted by -SpectraL If the dick was hard when you filled it with super glue, the pain of trying to shrink back would be unimaginable.
- pump male subject up with about 200mg viagra
- upon spontaneous erection, insert glass tube (has to be tube...cant be rod) into urethra, past urethral sphincters into bladder to full depth. penis will have to be oriented properly to allow full insertion.
- clamp used to close off tip of penis to prevent expulsion of tube.
- when viagra wears off...fun and profit
for additional fun times, the tube can be filled with various party favors. -
2017-06-18 at 6:57 PM UTCOften times the stuff for veterinary use is produced in the same place as the stuff for human use. You can also buy pills made for humans online if you're willing to wait forever for shipping from overseas.
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2017-06-18 at 7:01 PM UTC
Originally posted by Discount Whore 2.0 Often times the stuff for veterinary use is produced in the same place as the stuff for human use. You can also buy pills made for humans online if you're willing to wait forever for shipping from overseas.
sometimes.
as i already stated...it doesnt have the same degree of QC and safety oversight. -
2017-06-18 at 9:52 PM UTC
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2017-06-19 at 12:55 AM UTC
Originally posted by infinityshock edit: godammit, why the fuck do image links never work on this piece of shit site
fuck this.
Post last edited by infinityshock at 2017-06-18T13:16:23.055495+00:00
Post last edited by infinityshock at 2017-06-18T13:16:54.407346+00:00
Post last edited by infinityshock at 2017-06-18T13:17:03.486812+00:00
youre IQ needs to be at least this :
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high in order to be able use them. -
2017-06-19 at 3:25 AM UTC
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2017-06-19 at 2:38 PM UTCCrazy glue in duck.
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2017-06-19 at 2:45 PM UTC
