2024-04-10 at 2:46 PM UTC
High as a kite having a wonderful Wednesday morning β€οΈ
2024-04-10 at 2:56 PM UTC
The opposite of the poster above
πβ€οΈ
2024-04-10 at 3:17 PM UTC
Alexa!
Hey boo..play βWin Againβ by Nicki Minaj π
2024-04-10 at 3:26 PM UTC
They all in they feelings, can't fuq with Candy they know it
They know that Candy a poet, pop me a bottle of Moet
Not that I don't got good vision, but I don't see competition
They want me to come and help them ..but I am not a magician β¨ π΅π
2024-04-10 at 3:29 PM UTC
And I win again
And I win again
Yes I win again ππ΅
2024-04-10 at 3:45 PM UTC
Just bought an SBC handheld game system and I kinda feel anxious/sad/regretful about it. Not even that I guess, that's just the closest description I have. I am basically already mindfucking my own potential enjoyment of this thing.
Because now whenever I buy gaming things, I always re-realize once I get them and try to sit down and play them for a little while, that I don't have the actual direct interest to devote towards playing videogames any more.
I have all sorts of controllers, consoles, games etc that I bought and never played yet keep for "one day..."
That did will almost certainly never come. More likely I will just get sick of it being around and chuck out most of this shit and it will end up in a landfill.
And I will feel a small pain of how pointless it was for me to have indulged in such meta-consumption, despite already having had this conversation with myself a thousand times, because this time was supposed to have been different, because this thing had just particularly what I needed in terms of features or gimmick or unique selling point, to reignite the spark of my interest that all the others lacked.
I feel the general "fuck..." of this whole sequence of events already, even though it hasn't unfolded yet. Why did I buy this shitty thing? Am I really gonna sit around playing Game Cube games on this shit? I literally have a Wii with GC controllers, memory card and GameCube games that I already don't even play now.
Retro-er games? That's what I was thinking but I already have 1000 devices with emulators on them that I don't even play now. I even got a nice external SSD for my NVidia Shield Pro 4K, official controller, 3rd party controllers like 8BitDo and GameSir... Bro I don't play that shit even though it's literally on my TV box that I use for for media all the time.
At some point I'm gonna have to just be an adult to myseld and admit that I don't really like to play videogames any more and I should stop fucking around trying to recapture whatever I felt with them back in the day. It almost feels like a gay attempt to cling to childhood. It is time to put the toys down and grow the fuck up tbh.
I gotta just stop buying this stupid bullshit over and over trying to give a shit about games. I clearly don't care to follow modern games any more, don't watch E3, don't visit the gaming news sites or games reddit, don't give a shit about new games any more at all tbh. I mostly learn about them through 1 or 2 degrees of removal, someone else talking about some gaming was and I'll humor them and try to take interest and learn about a bit of what's going on... But no real interest develops really.
So I don't really give a shit about "games" in general any more.
All that attracts me is the idea of playing all the games I wanted to as a kid but never got around to, or maybe replay the ones I did and really liked, but I don't think it's cuz I really just want to actually play them so bad. I know I won't finish Contra 3, I just want to get through some levels and then abandon it. Thats what will happen. Maybe I will try some RPGs this time like replay some Golden Sun and Fire Emblem.
The "it's different this time" factor is that that it's a handheld, dedicated emulator device with for the first time what I'm convinced is ample power and good controls/general hardware and an actually decent 4:3 screen, in a portable enough form factor and with good enough battery life, and in a compact enough form factor to where I could conceivably "pick up and play" it a bit better.
But will I? Maybe. I probably shouldn't be mindfucking myself with these considerations if I really want to give it a proper college try. But if I don't end up using this device much, I think I am totally finished with gaming (other than some occasional Counter Strike).
Weird ramble but yeah that's what I'm feeling/thinking about.
.
