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I am bitch

  1. #21
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by Kafka You’re gonna be okay.

    This is what I tell ppl when they tell me their problems and I'm not really listening. Just agree I'm a bitch

    who's liable to spiral
    Doin lines off the Bible
    Food ammo and survival
    Killing the rodents like fivel

    American tale? More like Canadian jail
    In hades with a Mercedes on omw down to hell
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  2. #22
    Originally posted by Sudo Matt Damon 😭 I really went good will hunting

    It's hard when I kinda don't trust myself sometimes because when I get a slice of happy it seems so fleeting and so far from how I usually feel, it's hard to reconcile it as a normal feeling. I need to work on "grounding" because I think that's how you build a foundation of happy.

    Fuck I'm glad we're writing this stuff down

    Lol trust me I know. For a long time, and still sometimes now, if something good happens to me I will imagine and plan for every possible disaster bc that’s how my life was. It’s really hard to accept that I’ve gotten to where I am now and I still deal with those feelings of impending doom but I also push really hard to let/make good things happen bc I was incredibly unhappy for a long time and got sick of that shit.
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  3. #23
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by frala Lol trust me I know. For a long time, and still sometimes now, if something good happens to me I will imagine and plan for every possible disaster bc that’s how my life was. It’s really hard to accept that I’ve gotten to where I am now and I still deal with those feelings of impending doom but I also push really hard to let/make good things happen bc I was incredibly unhappy for a long time and got sick of that shit.

    Yeah, it becomes a self perpetuating cycle, the worst part is I'll call people out for being self defeatist and negative while I'm really just saying that don't mope and set themselves up for failure on as high a level as I do. It's kinda scary functioning with a higher level of happiness knowing you might screw it up? I gotta say I'm pretty disappointed in myself for not trying and underachieving/going for thr low hanging fruit. It's allowed a meh kinda lane but I gotta do something so I'm not the loser in the bar talking about how things could have all been different. Basically so I'm not my dad between the years 1994-2015
  4. #24
    Yeah it’s scary but it’s worth it bc being scared is better than being miserable and on that note I’m gonna shut up bc I’m starting to sound a little too self help lol
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  5. #25
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by frala Yeah it’s scary but it’s worth it bc being scared is better than being miserable and on that note I’m gonna shut up bc I’m starting to sound a little too self help lol

    Well you might have mended my gayass broken fucking wings so shut up I don't even care, maybe I liked spiraling, it's fine IM FINE
  6. #26
    So taaaaaaake these broken wings and learn to fly again, learn to live so freeeee

    Ok I’m done fr
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  7. #27
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Technologist I definitely don’t feel like I deserve good things. So when a good thing comes my way, I sabotage it.😏

    I'm similar in a way, not sure if it's semi-intentional subconsciously or coincidence or what.

    How do you think you're gonna end up sabotaging your new residence?
  8. #28
    Rape Monster Naturally Camouflaged
    ow
  9. #29
    WellHung Black Hole
    Push it out, fake a smile
    Avert disaster just in time
    I need a drink, cause in a while
    Worthless answers from friends of mine…
  10. #30
    Technologist victim of incest
    Originally posted by mmQ I'm similar in a way, not sure if it's semi-intentional subconsciously or coincidence or what.

    How do you think you're gonna end up sabotaging your new residence?

    I’ve usually done well to maintain a home. It’s always in relationships, and with high dollar items, like cars. Oh and of course being self destructive.

    I’ll admit I’ve gotten better at not sabotaging myself in my old age. Somewhat settled at 56, but gotta admit I’ve been self destructive as of late. Go figure🤷‍♀️
  11. #31
    cigreting Dark Matter
    I will actually donate some of my time to teach you how not to be such a whiny feminine bitch if youd like

    You make women dry
  12. #32
    Technologist victim of incest
    Originally posted by cigreting I will actually donate some of my time to teach you how not to be such a whiny feminine bitch if youd like

    You make women dry

    You know better than that cig. I’m not a feminist, nor am I a whiner. Try again.

    Nooo, I make my own self dry after menopause. 😂😂😂
  13. #33
    Originally posted by frala Lol trust me I know. For a long time, and still sometimes now, if something good happens to me I will imagine and plan for every possible disaster bc that’s how my life was. It’s really hard to accept that I’ve gotten to where I am now and I still deal with those feelings of impending doom but I also push really hard to let/make good things happen bc I was incredibly unhappy for a long time and got sick of that shit.

    Dude thats me. Every girl i ever meet that i feel anything for, immediately picture in my head the last fight well have. How angry or sad her face will look. The things shell scream at me. Maybe she’ll throw something at me or call the cops. I told my gf that and it made her really sad but thats kinda just how my brain works and it feels reallyunnerving for things to be going well bc it feels like im just at the precipice of something sudden and painful.
  14. #34
    troon African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Technologist I definitely don’t feel like I deserve good things. So when a good thing comes my way, I sabotage it.😏

    it's not always a bad way to do things. for one, it might be a trap. and if not then it's going to fuck up at some point, so get it out of the way and carry on. you're just doing an inb4 in real life.
  15. #35
    Originally posted by General Butt.Naked Dude thats me. Every girl i ever meet that i feel anything for, immediately picture in my head the last fight well have. How angry or sad her face will look. The things shell scream at me. Maybe she’ll throw something at me or call the cops. I told my gf that and it made her really sad but thats kinda just how my brain works and it feels reallyunnerving for things to be going well bc it feels like im just at the precipice of something sudden and painful.

    Yeah I think most people who grew up in chaos and/or really unstable situations deal with this.
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  16. #36
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    My plan is gonna kinda tie all those things together

    1. Kick out baby mom, help her find a decent place for the kids. Make any support contingent on skills workshops and therapy. Kinda manipulative I know but that way I can sleep a little better.

    2. Find another relationship with someone who is only medium crazy

    3. Deal with my opiate addiction/mental health issues and focus on things I need to be a better person/build on shit. Step 2 and 3 should probably be reversed

    4. Slowly reintegrate myself into my daughter's life.

    5. Get my lawyers to setup some co parenting agreements that ar3 in the objective interest of the children

    6. Try to live more mindfully, peacefully and spiritually, ideally with a creative aspect

    Anyone else have any wild unrealistic fantasies? No, shut up, me, I'm gonna manifest this ass over life's face and never look back. I'm 6 months out the system today first time since I was a hawt awkward teen, I can fucking do this
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  17. #37
    WellHung Black Hole
    Perhaps you should keep the relating to 4 walls and a ceiling?
  18. #38
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by WellHung Perhaps you should keep the relating to 4 walls and a ceiling?

    Are you saying your favorite movie is Tommy Oiseaus "the room?"
  19. #39
    Lodger Free African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Kafka Stop caring about it all and watch anime

    Glowie. FVEY much?

    Who's next on the cake list
  20. #40
    Lodger Free African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Sudo Are you saying your favorite movie is Tommy Oiseaus "the room?"

    Did anyone ever figure out what country he was from?

    I bet on Romania.

    Where did 6 million come from.
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