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True story about my day with a hot doctor, a jockstrap and a group of African men

  1. #1
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    So early hours of this morning around 2 am I woke up with what seemed to be just an itchy ass. After 15 minutes of scratching it I realised it was beginning to become excruciatingly painful so decided to apply cream which did next to nothing and the pain got that bad I thought fuck this and called for an ambulabce and when it came near the license plate said fresh and it had dice the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare But I thought nah fuck it yo holmes to bel air!

    I pulled up to a hospital about seven or eight
    And I yelled to the cabbie yo holmes, smell ya later (True story continued)

    Went straight to A&E and got seen to by this hot doctor after a fucked up 10 hour wait. She examined me and I began to notice she was developing beautifully teary eyes behind her covid mask.

    I said Im sure Ive seen those pretty eyes before and she said yes Leon you have…

    Then I realised I knew her from a previous ward a while back where she treated me like shit but I had still bought her flowers, chocolates and perfume after helping me either way and because I had a huge crush on her.

    She kept mumbling how sorry she was to me and then had me sent off to another ward full of niggers and a random chink guy.

    I was like ok you really gonna get fucked up now pal!

    The chink guy said Leon I need you to relieve yourself into this vial for me now, I was like shit ok but came out of the bathroom with an empty vial.

    He then said, congratulations on relieving yourself. I was like yeah yeah joke you can see its empty you vinny looking faggot. Then he said I mean you really are relieved, you can go home! Just put on this jockstrap.

    I almost punched the chinks lights out before he said, take a look around at your family Leon, you really are home.

    It turns out all the niggers were part of my family tree I never knew existed who worked in that same hospital. Then I walked out wearing nothing but a jockstrap and a smile on my face. While the doctor “Ellie” was watching me with tears still pouring down her face.

    A lot more to this TRUE story and I have a pic to prove it too.

    I’d beforehand packed an overnight stay bag not knowing what was gonna happen on my arrival there.

    I worked out she was such a bitch to me the first time because she saw a pic of my angel and was jelly. (Pic of my angel and my wristband on request)

    So in the end the whole thing was a way of apologising to me.

    Still havent gotten to the “bottom” of the itching, could it actually have been from jock itchy really vinny you faggot
  2. #2
    STER0S Space Nigga [the disappointingly unanticipated slab]
    wut
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  3. #3
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    Ya’ll non-belibers can just go ahead and suck it
  4. #4
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    And the drinking pics are part of the reason I was in hospital in the first place. Tomorrow im going black with gifts for everyone involved, just a shame I split up with my angel since then.

    Miracles do come true and Ive already relpaced her with a real angel.
  5. #5
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    Inb4 inbred faggot nerds talking about the time they stayed up ALL night chewing glass and playing minecraft LOL
  6. #6
    homo
  7. #7
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    You are?
  8. #8
    homoracial.

    yes.
  9. #9
    cryptographiccontrarian African Astronaut
  10. #10
    cigreting Dark Matter
    what a cum looking faggot
  11. #11
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    Name 3 drinkers accessories- go!
  12. #12
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    Money

    mints

    Paracetamol
  13. #13
    STER0S Space Nigga [the disappointingly unanticipated slab]
    cock ring
    money
    tits
  14. #14
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    Originally posted by STER0S cock ring
    money
    tits

    I already said money and tits comes under “after effects of drinking”, which we’ll get through later class
  15. #15
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    Viagra

    Water

    Cab number
  16. #16
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    Funny how everyone in here got their ass handed to them by me 🤣
  17. #17
    cigreting Dark Matter
    semen
    viewing
    homosexual
  18. #18
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    Sick bag

    Joblessness

    Bandages

    Answers coming on a board
  19. #19
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
  20. #20
    Grylls Cum Looking Faggot [abrade this vocal tread-softly]
    Is an UBER not a taxi?

    Now the more serious longterm effects of alcohol on the body lads

    Obesity

    Liver problems

    Unwanted children
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