2017-03-10 at 6:50 AM UTC
a few days ago i shit my pants from sorbitol in koffgels, today i got diarrhea on my dick in some unexplainable way while taking a dump, and now a few hours later grease started leaking out of my butthole so i ran to the porcelain buddha and i just shit out a huge bubble of oil and when i wiped it dyed the toilet paper bright yellow from tumeric. i havent showered in weeks and i've cleaned shit off my dick, thighs, butthole, and hands with wet towels and rubbing alcohol. also every time there are swarms of dingleberries i have to remove one by one.
here's what im taking so you too can experience colon jedi hell
2 tablespoons tumeric
teaspoon black pepe
10grams fish oil
900mg ashwagandha with extract
multivite
energy dank
high dose ginkgo biloba (intermittent)
zoloft
gabapentin
im guessing fish oil caused the oil bubble, tumeric caused yellowass, black pepe caused infinite zygote poos, and everything together caused shit dick leg hand
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
2017-03-10 at 6:54 AM UTC
Haha thanks for sharing the stack
2017-03-10 at 6:55 AM UTC
My shit lately has ranged from bright yellow sheets to pitch black hints and a little bit in between but mostly those two.
2017-03-10 at 7:10 AM UTC
DocFoster
Tuskegee Airman
[concentrate my unpalatable boomer]
Truly if you are unshowered in that image you could be doing worse, but you should probably scrub regularly
2017-03-10 at 7:17 AM UTC
Hey sploo can you please post the picture of you riding the carousel?
2017-03-10 at 7:20 AM UTC
i would but i dont think i have it saved
2017-03-10 at 7:24 AM UTC
*sigh*
That always cheered me up. Malice still got it but he took a quarter Xannax and is out of order for the next two weeks.
2017-03-10 at 7:26 AM UTC
When I'm dead and physical boundaries really don't apply anymore I'll come to you and check your shit out.
Shiterally.
2017-03-10 at 7:28 AM UTC
Then I'll be like
"Ugh. That's some weird shit." and haunt your mother the evil witch.
2017-03-10 at 7:29 AM UTC
Do you have any special requests regarding the haunting of your mother?
2017-03-10 at 7:36 AM UTC
can you reach into her brain and rewire the things that make her retarded pls. they have a whole class like this for your kind.
2017-03-10 at 7:39 AM UTC
You mean the honorable Dr. Mengele's class? Yea, dude, I got the lobotomy down. I don't even need to be a ghost to do that.
2017-03-10 at 3:30 PM UTC
take a shower you fucking cretin