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The Retarded Thread: Get off that bus edition
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2020-04-13 at 7:43 AM UTCThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2020-04-13 at 7:56 AM UTCThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2020-04-13 at 1:01 PM UTCSince someone mentioned something about criminals, i figured i'd tell you a story about the criminals in my city. They all walk around carrying these pistols they call "lady killers" i guess they refer to them as such because these pistols are pretty smol and easily concealed. In actuality they carry Walther PP series pistols but they don't care about proper gun terminology and stuff like that. Anyway, it's probably a good idea they carry firearms. Because these are the kind of people that like to get into serious trouble over dumb shit.
For instance, one night they were walking to the home of some dude for an after party. It was pretty late, and they were making a ruckus, because they don't give a fuck. Well, out of a house comes walking a lady. And she tells them to shut the fuck up she's trying to sleep. So one of these asshole walks up to her and back-hands her right back into her house. This was a very, very bad idea.
Turns out this lady is married to some Russian mob kind of person. So fast-forward three days, and our slimy heroes are standing at their regular spot. It's behind this shopping mall complex, they are easy to find. When all of a sudden three black vans pull up at a high rate of speed. Trying to box them in. Well, they're assholes but they knew what was going on so they made a run for it. In the chaos a couple shots were exchanged but no one got hurt. They all met somewhere and after doing a head count they realized someone was missing. They tried to call him but no answer. Now they're getting a little worried. So this person who they call "Flow" because he can beatbox pretty well, is now literally missing. They didn't see him for 5 days, only to find him beaten up like fuck and malnourished one day around the shopping mall complex.
When they asked him what happened here's what "Flow" told them: When the vans pulled up he tried to run away like everyone else, but he got grabbed. They forced him into the back of the van at gun point. They put a blind fold on him and started driving for long, long while. Presumably to some kind of safe house, he got put in the basement. And he was beaten on a regular basis. He was told why he was there, he was told his disrespect had earned him a bullet to the head, but not after suffering for what he had done. So on the last day, they bound him to a chair. And brought him a shot of Whiskey and a cigarette, kind of like a last meal sort of thing. To steady his nerves, to make the passing a little easier you know. They freed one of his hands and let him sip his whiskey for a little while and smoke his cigarette. Then one of the Russians did what looked like putting a bullet in the chamber of his gun. He walked to the back of him While another Russian stayed in front. They put the gun to his head and click. Nothing happened, it was a mock execution. Then he got a knockout blow to the face from the guy that was standing in front of him. Next thing he knows, he is getting thrown out of a van, somewhere near the shopping mall complex.
I guess they wanted to teach him a lesson, but the shitty part is "Flow" is actually one of the nicer guys, the guy that did the slapping he ran away. Anyway, they learned their lesson alright. They decided to take a detour next time they were going to this guy they had an after party with's house.
Jesus.
True story though.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2020-04-13 at 1:11 PM UTCSome girl I was close friends with last year is now an enemy. I've said some dumb shit drunk over txts being pissed over falling out. This lockdown is probably one of few things stopping me getting a whooping. Her kid's dad gave her mum's address as his own, so when they come looking they nearly gave her a heart attack. She went down with some guys and beat him into a coma. She had blood ALL over her face when I saw her.
I've not pissed her off that bad but I feel I have a setup or home invasion of sorts coming from maybe someone else at some point. -
2020-04-13 at 1:31 PM UTC
Originally posted by Octavian Some girl I was close friends with last year is now an enemy. I've said some dumb shit drunk over txts being pissed over falling out. This lockdown is probably one of few things stopping me getting a whooping. Her kid's dad gave her mum's address as his own, so when they come looking they nearly gave her a heart attack. She went down with some guys and beat him into a coma. She had blood ALL over her face when I saw her.
I've not pissed her off that bad but I feel I have a setup or home invasion of sorts coming from maybe someone else at some point.
Yeah, gangster paradise, it's fun until it's not. -
2020-04-13 at 1:40 PM UTCI tend to meet girls who I can tell like me more than they let on. They invest a lot into helping me but then realise I'm a lost fucking cause due to my own ignorance and shit goes south. This is like the 3rd girl this has happened with now.
Lol a mate always took the piss replying so I told his gf who lives fucking miles away, that he fathered a child with someone else. I'm quite an emotional drunk which has caused some embarrassing episodes too.
God I'm pathetic. -
2020-04-13 at 1:45 PM UTCIt's better to find 'lost cause' girls. They're out there, they're interesting. Some of them, are even attractive. Unless you like it when they try to 'fix' you. I guess it feels attentive, but they'll be disappointed in the long run.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2020-04-13 at 1:51 PM UTC
Originally posted by Sophie It's better to find 'lost cause' girls. They're out there, they're interesting. Some of them, are even attractive. Unless you like it when they try to 'fix' you. I guess it feels attentive, but they'll be disappointed in the long run.
I mean I'll give the last one her due she fucking HELPED me out in a big way. That job I had meant everything was blue skies and rainbows. She stuck around for as long as she could after I fell down but I guess people like me can only help themselves.
What are you doing today? Debating whether to get some winez. -
2020-04-13 at 1:56 PM UTC
Originally posted by Octavian I mean I'll the last one her due she fucking HELPED me out in a big way. That job I had meant everything was blue skies and rainbows. She stuck around for as long as she could after I fell down but I guess people like me can only help themselves.
What are you doing today? Debating whether to get some winez.
Chilling, banged my gf, had some coffee, smoked a cig, i'm putting off making lunch cuz i can't be assed. Still have some Vodka, guess i'll have a shot or two.
We were supposed to go to my mom's house, she hosts a brunch every Easter, it's one of those things. But Easter is Corona-cancelled because i was supposed to pick up my little sister and drive her and my gf up to my mom's. But the government decided it wasn't ok to sit in a car with more than 2 people. I thought fuck that, but my mom insisted i stayed at home, because "You might get a ticket!" Lol.
Oh well. -
2020-04-13 at 2:41 PM UTCMy church had an illegal mass gathering for Easter and we all rubbed up against each other's bodies.
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2020-04-13 at 2:42 PM UTC
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2020-04-13 at 2:43 PM UTC
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2020-04-13 at 2:50 PM UTCI seriously need to bust nut.
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2020-04-13 at 2:51 PM UTCTake a bunch of benzos and bundy that completely kills my sex drive and makes me unable to cum
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2020-04-13 at 2:55 PM UTC
Originally posted by the man who put it in my hood Take a bunch of benzos and bundy that completely kills my sex drive and makes me unable to cum
The need to bust stops me feeling lazy, albeit I like being lazy, but by busting it removes the urge to find dirty womenz and relapsing.
Which I won't anyway. -
2020-04-13 at 3:01 PM UTCmornin
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2020-04-13 at 3:08 PM UTC
Originally posted by Octavian The need to bust stops me feeling lazy, albeit I like being lazy, but by busting it removes the urge to find dirty womenz and relapsing.
Which I won't anyway.
You aren't using the drugs to get high. Both are legal medications approved for medical treatment for various symptoms. One of the symptoms it can control is an active sex drive.
The side effects are pretty horrible. If you don't have anxiety and take bundy and benzos all the time life starts to feel like living in a can of soup -
2020-04-13 at 5:28 PM UTC
Originally posted by Sophie Since someone mentioned something about criminals, i figured i'd tell you a story about the criminals in my city. They all walk around carrying these pistols they call "lady killers" i guess they refer to them as such because these pistols are pretty smol and easily concealed. In actuality they carry Walther PP series pistols but they don't care about proper gun terminology and stuff like that. Anyway, it's probably a good idea they carry firearms. Because these are the kind of people that like to get into serious trouble over dumb shit.
For instance, one night they were walking to the home of some dude for an after party. It was pretty late, and they were making a ruckus, because they don't give a fuck. Well, out of a house comes walking a lady. And she tells them to shut the fuck up she's trying to sleep. So one of these asshole walks up to her and back-hands her right back into her house. This was a very, very bad idea.
Turns out this lady is married to some Russian mob kind of person. So fast-forward three days, and our slimy heroes are standing at their regular spot. It's behind this shopping mall complex, they are easy to find. When all of a sudden three black vans pull up at a high rate of speed. Trying to box them in. Well, they're assholes but they knew what was going on so they made a run for it. In the chaos a couple shots were exchanged but no one got hurt. They all met somewhere and after doing a head count they realized someone was missing. They tried to call him but no answer. Now they're getting a little worried. So this person who they call "Flow" because he can beatbox pretty well, is now literally missing. They didn't see him for 5 days, only to find him beaten up like fuck and malnourished one day around the shopping mall complex.
When they asked him what happened here's what "Flow" told them: When the vans pulled up he tried to run away like everyone else, but he got grabbed. They forced him into the back of the van at gun point. They put a blind fold on him and started driving for long, long while. Presumably to some kind of safe house, he got put in the basement. And he was beaten on a regular basis. He was told why he was there, he was told his disrespect had earned him a bullet to the head, but not after suffering for what he had done. So on the last day, they bound him to a chair. And brought him a shot of Whiskey and a cigarette, kind of like a last meal sort of thing. To steady his nerves, to make the passing a little easier you know. They freed one of his hands and let him sip his whiskey for a little while and smoke his cigarette. Then one of the Russians did what looked like putting a bullet in the chamber of his gun. He walked to the back of him While another Russian stayed in front. They put the gun to his head and click. Nothing happened, it was a mock execution. Then he got a knockout blow to the face from the guy that was standing in front of him. Next thing he knows, he is getting thrown out of a van, somewhere near the shopping mall complex.
I guess they wanted to teach him a lesson, but the shitty part is "Flow" is actually one of the nicer guys, the guy that did the slapping he ran away. Anyway, they learned their lesson alright. They decided to take a detour next time they were going to this guy they had an after party with's house.
Jesus.
True story though.
. Russians seem way more serious -
2020-04-13 at 7:14 PM UTCRussian mob the realest. Russian underground the hardest.
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2020-04-13 at 9:18 PM UTCchechnya and albania got the realest niggas
