Originally posted by Juicebox
At one point in time my mother wanted a cheap computer for Journaling or some shit
I was at goodwill one day and saw that they had a few old ass iMacs, and wanted $10 a piece for them, so I bought one
She didn't like it, so I thought maybe it would be worth something because it was so old and you know how applefags can be
Found out they were selling for around $100, not really worth it to me so it just sat in the trunk of a car for a while
A couple years later, after I had been forced into homelessness due to low pay and shitty family, my bridgemates and I were sitting around a fire drunk and stoned as fuck, trying to figure something to do
So we started finding things to throw on the fire to pass the time. Old clothes, non working electronics, a box of 7.62x39 rounds, stuff like that
Eventually we ran out of shit, so we went to my car,which was parked in a parking lot a quarter mile away, and looked in there for shit to burn. We saw the iMac, and looked at each other. We knew this was gonna be fun.
When we first threw it on the fire it didn't seem to do anything. For like ten minutes it just sat there. A puff of smoke now and again, a small pop. Boring. So one of my bridgemates hit it a few times with the axe we used to chop logs,and threw a cup of kerosene on it
It began decomposing at a quicker rate now, popping louder and more often, the plastic parts began to melt and shrink, and eventually this thick, black smoke that caused nearly instant syncope if inhaled began to pour out.
Eventually it got to be too much and we had to leave that section of the bridge, electing to sit on the railroad tracks about 50 yards away instead. We were protected from the smoke by a ten foot wall.
By now the smoke was pouring out and small explosions occurred irregularly every couple of minutes. We were almost positive that a visit from the fire department was imminent. But we had a horrible realization: we forgot the fucking beer on the other side of the wall.
So I drew in a deep breath, ran back behind the wall, grabbed the 12 pack, and ran back out, with just enough breath to spare.
A couple beers later, the smoke was still pouring out and the explosions had become more frequent but less powerful, occurring every few seconds. We couldn't remember where our box of 500 9mm rounds were, and we became worried that they were the source of the constant pops.
So I drew another deep breath and ran back in, looked around, and found the box of ammo about 6 feet from the fire. The fire had spread to a larger area but was still not tall, and well away from our storage area or anything else flammable.
I grabbed the box, but ran out of breath on my way out, and accidentally got a lung full of the smoke, which nearly knocked me right out. I became instantly dizzy and couldn't stand up, so I set the box of ammo down on the other side of the wall, and crawled back to the railroad tracks. After a moment of recuperation I got the box of ammo and brought it to our spot on the tracks.
No matter how hard I tried, I could not stop laughing for a solid hour
Good times indeed
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miss michigan.
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[vulgar and hostile racial slur][violent stabs at the poster's sexual orientation][snitty snooty snarky berating of the poster's level of intelligence, with suggestions of suicide][a concise, complete and severely hurtful summary sentence which removes any sense of personal worth or valur from poster]
[obscure and eccentric random image of half meme half sociopathic themes]
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2018-09-08 at 11:28 PM UTC
in
Best of Bill Krozby
I was searching for something and came across a funny Bill Krozbypost, so I took a minute to cobble together the Best of Bill Krozby.
Originally posted by Bill Krozby
I was molested when I was 5 years old
i have 2 felonies
I dated this lady that was 10 years older than me last year
I was yelling "what the fuck!" and this asian bitch nurse came up and was like "you're handcuffed because you tried to fight the cops"
I actually did a jock strap basket ball shoot for a guy once and came
i have the others herpes
I quit paying child support, partially because i didn't have much attachment to my kid
So now I'm trying to normalize my drinking because I'm obviously an alcoholic
I was arrested for sexual assault.
he tells me to take off my clothes or else he's not going to give me the money, I go ahead and undress
I was molested
luckily i never cared about my daughters mom
several times when I was 19 I had guys comeover and pay me to watch me fuck my girlfriend, ,one guy even touched my balls while i was doing it… One time I made 300 to let a guy take pictures of me nude while he smoked crack.
I WAS MOLESTED!
Post your favorite Bill Krozbyposts.
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2018-09-08 at 7:03 PM UTC
in
Perm delete Facebook
The Matrix was actually a documentary about a mild mannered computer programmer trying to delete his facebook.
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Originally posted by aldra
Yeah, I've always been for full legalization, allowing people to be as self-destructive as they like. Unfortunately though, that doesn't take into account the large segment of the population with no common sense or self control who would drive a bus or operate a crane on PCP without giving it a second thought.
Everyone who posts on this site is of average or better intelligence, and we have people who drink DVD cleaner, shoot beekeeping supplies and huff shit fumes - what does that say for the other 50%?
okay but if you allow people to destroy themselves does that mean the tax payers has to pay for their healthcare? libertarian dumbshit pseudo anarchist ideals don't hold in a reality where people have vested interests in things, like not paying for junkies.
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aldra
JIDF Controlled Opposition
Yeah, I've always been for full legalization, allowing people to be as self-destructive as they like. Unfortunately though, that doesn't take into account the large segment of the population with no common sense or self control who would drive a bus or operate a crane on PCP without giving it a second thought.
Everyone who posts on this site is of average or better intelligence, and we have people who drink DVD cleaner, shoot beekeeping supplies and huff shit fumes - what does that say for the other 50%?
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Originally posted by Item 9
$you know how to do $25 etiz order set it up and i give you shipping imfo
fucking benzo addicts are the lowest form of life next to aboriginals.
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EAT SOME NUTMEG
acid without nutmeg is like spring without flowers
clouds without a sky
life without meaning
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Originally posted by Technologist
Well if that’s the case, I’ll stick with my stupidity!
You don't have a choice anyway.
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Originally posted by Playinginmud
I know a few people here that would be into that body type lol
Who isn't? Sploo is a sex god. An idol for an entire generation of upcoming serial killers.
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2018-09-06 at 3:36 AM UTC
in
LSD's PI and family PI
Sudo
Black Hole
[my hereto riemannian peach]
Tomorrow I'm Google street viewing his moms place so I'm really specific with my instructions
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It takes me 36 minutes to prepare my Malice every day.
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Sudo
Black Hole
[my hereto riemannian peach]
TO THE POINT OF GOOGLING ME
It takes Cuban junkies weeks of obsession before they break down and Google something
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2018-09-05 at 9:14 PM UTC
in
Is Trump the Anti Christ?
I don't pay attention to any news except the National Enquirer. Sometimes the Ask Marilyn column because she's smart and shit.
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Sudo
Black Hole
[my hereto riemannian peach]
You should emphasize their failure at trying to be attractive, not that she succeeds in getting men to pine over her. It would be better if you told them that they're ugly and everyone is only nice to them to exploit them and everything wrong in their life is their fault. And they're fat and not fit to ever be a mother.
I've told women they were ugly inside and out with success
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-SpectraL
coward
[the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
Originally posted by DietPiano
We are ELECTRIC BEINGS
and I have decided to have sex with as many girls and wimen I am emotionally compatible with, so I may experience them more deeply, and intimately know my fellow humans. They cannot forget or take that away, which is lovly as it adds, deepens, and enrichens the human experience for me and for them
yes
Every day since I quit xanax I have become more and more human, I uncover new layers of myself and my eyesight gets imperceptibly better and my touch and sences are spidery
as i spiders them
yes
Theise words feel
legalize krek
I read that as "legalize krοz" the first time I read it.
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aldra
JIDF Controlled Opposition
Originally posted by mmQ
*brings out scroll of your Bundy posts*
DaturaRetroWave
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stupid noob
VICTIM of farm equipment
[the momentously grade-constructed phasmatodea]
You were right, that's why she started crying. That's what all women do when caught in a lie. You should have beaten her.
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