igbo
Yung Blood
[cringe your preliminary chenopodium]
last night i was really high on mephedrone (4mmc) and for some reason whenever i take cathinones/methamphetamine my mind goes to a really perverse horny depraved place and i start looking at shemale porn lol XD i was on my phone and i downloaded this app for hooking up with shemales. it's basically tinder it shows you someone then you click like or dislike and then it shows you the next person until you run out of turns. so this super hot thick latina bitch that was wearing a sexy police costume in her picture pops up. scroll down and it says pronouns: shemale (trans woman) so i'm like fuck yeah and smashed the like button. the phone dings cause she liked me back and now we can text back and forth. here is what our text message exchange looked like:
she messages first: "hey sexy"
i replied immediately: "you're hot as fuck i'd let you arrest me any day"
she replies back: "haha might have to strip search you"
at this point my stomach was growling cause i didn't eat much this week so i got up and went to make some scrambled eggs. total time spent cooking and eating the 3 eggs was 30 minutes TOPS. the only reason it took that long was because i used the tiniest burner on my stove and a big pan so it took a long time to heat up and cook the 3 eggs. i am not sure what compelled me to do that but i digress.
i finish the eggs and pick up my phone and check the app and no longer see the thread with whats her name? i can't see our messages or her at all they just vanished.
here is the worst part of the story: my dumbass PAYS $15 FOR THE PREMIUM GOLD VERSION OF THE APP WHICH WILL SHOW PREVIOUSLY MATCHED PROFILES AND LET YOU MESSAGE THEM
i see her profile and i message her: "hey idk what happened but i lost your messages! apps being weird lol"
she hits me with the triple text: *girl shrugging shoulders emoji*
You didn't seem very interested I'm not gonna wait around all night
i go: i was eating a plate of eggs it's been 20 minutes
then the icing on the cake from her: ENJOY YOUR FUCKING EGGS
*blocks me*
BITCHES (WITH DICKS) BE CRAZY
I wish i was asexual :/
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
igbo
Yung Blood
[cringe your preliminary chenopodium]
Originally posted by Bradley
OP are you of strong constitution?
i am! its been 6 years since i last threw up/got sick from food which ironically was caused by a double cheeseburger (from in n out, not where this one was from)
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
