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Coming out of retirement

  1. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Smooches
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  2. Speedy Parker Black Hole [my absentmindedly lachrymatory gazania]
    Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ That would be free advertising.

    Just as I thought... But the truth is the name will be changed soon.
  3. Speedy Parker Black Hole [my absentmindedly lachrymatory gazania]
    I almost forgot to mention I delivered a cashiers check for $3500 to Chicago Title yesterday for the earnest deposit in the escrow account. Also I signed the closing documents on the loan for the down-payment and the disbursement date is no later than 14AUG23.

    The closing date on the sale of the restaurant is 04SEP23.
  4. Originally posted by Speedy Parker …But the truth is the name will be changed soon.

    And I will receive a text update when it does.
  5. Pete Green African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Speedy Parker Oh your feelings are hurt…

    you have a reading problem it seems. I literally just said the opposite of that
  6. Speedy Parker Black Hole [my absentmindedly lachrymatory gazania]
    Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ And I will receive a text update when it does.

    What's the going rate for the sexting service you use these days.


    Originally posted by Pete Green you have a reading problem it seems. I literally just said the opposite of that

    Between the lines... and not the ones caused by your folds of fat.
  7. Cowboy2013 African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Speedy Parker Keeps out the riff raff.

    You said you were going to sell wings for 50 cents each.
  8. Originally posted by Speedy Parker Lol I saw your pics on zoklet and you looked like fat death with no shoulders or hair way back then.

    DId he post on zoklet? I always thought he was making that up but if you say he did I believe it.

    reopsting thisse

    Originally posted by Big the Cat LORE UNCLOCKDD!!!!! THE WHAT??!

    I have drafted some designs for floorplans



    and that still leaves room for a brewery/ clandestine space LSD lab in the basement


    OP doesn't even have a thematic bar for his restaurant SMH you need a HOOK man you can't just have some restaurant a dime a dozen you gotta stand out and have TROPES

  9. Originally posted by Speedy Parker I've told many if the departed young dipshits here the same thing over the years. Where are they now? Gone, all gone.


    Anyhow back on topic. Here's a sample of half the menu, I can't be assed to edit the other pages for security.


    I am going to critically review the FUCK out of this who designed it??????? I mean it's not overtly bad or anything.. Why is each page a totally different theme though? okay the first 2 pages have the same background but the third one is like a diner menu. This is just the rough draft?? I don't see why the design would change for the last part

    the color scheme is honestly better on the last one but the rustic theme of the first two I think would be a better fit
  10. Also I am not a fan of "MORNIN' MEALS" as a label for an entire section but there's no "afternoon meals" or anything just MORNIN MEALS and then the rest is like a normal menu

    it's like someone had an idea for themes and was doing it in a style but then came back days later and switched it and did that a few times. It's not a bad menu at all I just think the styling is a bit all over the place

    which could be an intentional choice by whoever made this or a rough draft, thats my initial first impression from a gay porn perspective (i have no formal experience with gay porn) but I do design menus for lulz


    I GOT MENU SOFTWARE all template based, this feels also template based maybe, could all be done by hand which this person has pretty good skill if they just made all that from scratch in photoshop

    do you really need the picture of orange juice here. I'm not gonna criticize a menu for using clip art but I think menus with actual pictures of the cooked food is way better. Are you gonna do online ubereats at all? The menus for that always seem to be an afterthought and don't always translate well. Could be a lot better if you planned it before the place opens I think.

    When I see a place that has a website and you go to their ubereats and its all HIGH QUALITY PICTURES of the food and same pics on the website instead of clip art, ive seen some lower end pizza places do this and it really helps them stand out I think


    The layout of the menu items is solid, zero issue with that, good front, good size, clean layout, that is all perfect.


    Originally posted by RIPtotse oh my fuck those prices tho

    I would agree but my local hole in the wall dinner I feel like is similar priced and its one of the cheapest in my hood next to the pancake special from that sketchy seeming diner that apparently is open at 4am

    it's probably fair priced for the area im guessing looking at the general price. Eating out is fucking expensive these days like the breakfast sandwich used to be $6.99 when I moved here and it's $9.50 now plus tax. It comes with home fries A GOOD PORTION but still

  11. Pete Green African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Cowboy2013 You said you were going to sell wings for 50 cents each.

    He'll probably stuff them with his boogers after they're cooked
  12. Pete Green African Astronaut
    I dig Smoke Salmon. That I can eat. but salmon itself makes me feel queezy. I love white fish but smoke salmon is good.
  13. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    As long as they have Sierra Mist they'll be just fine. They could serve rotten dirty diapers so long as they have the cool crisp refreshment of a nice cold Sierra Mist to accompany it and the folks would be happy just so happy indeed.
  14. shuldnt it be Avocado toast 5
    (add bacon 2.00)

    I feel like it would be better even looking at
    add bacon 2.50

    than
    add bacon 7.00

    this almost seems like the bacon is $7 to add on the $5 toast. It takes your brain a second (maybe i have brain damage)
    I KNOWITS SUPPOSED TO BE 2+5 BUT THAT ASSUMES THE PERSON ORDERING KNOWS HOW TO ADD TWO NUMBERS or actually nah that's a fuckup because you gotta do math to realize the bacon is $2

    even though it makes more sense probably to list it as 7.00 like it's just showing the total cost of bacon+toast so you don't HAVE to do it in your head but I think human brains are fucktarded, im not an expert on marketing but people get paid the big bucks to figure shit like this out.

    5.99 vs $6 etc

    the .99 trick folk always show the customer the smaller number first because it will trick their brain OH ONLY $2 OF COURSE I WILL GET TAHT vs they see a 7 like EEEEE BIG NUMBER BAD

  15. Pete Green African Astronaut
    Originally posted by mmQ As long as they have Sierra Mist they'll be just fine. They could serve rotten dirty diapers so long as they have the cool crisp refreshment of a nice cold Sierra Mist to accompany it and the folks would be happy just so happy indeed.

    You prefer that over Mountain Dew? does Sierra Mist even have Caffeine in it?
  16. Pete Green African Astronaut
    Originally posted by ☆$P₳C3🐏🌟👍👌🏻꒰⌐■ω■꒱👍🏿🪐$H33P🐑🌛 shuldnt it be Avocado toast 5
    (add bacon 2.00)

    I feel like it would be better even looking at
    add bacon 2.50

    than
    add bacon 7.00

    this almost seems like the bacon is $7 to add on the $5 toast. It takes your brain a second (maybe i have brain damage)

    the .99 trick folk always show the customer the smaller number first because it will trick their brain OH ONLY $2 OF COURSE I WILL GET TAHT vs they see a 7 like EEEEE BIG NUMBER BAD


    LOL it should be Bacon 7 dollars. Avacado Toast add 5 dollars. seems backwards, doesn't it. based on price
  17. mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Pete Green You prefer that over Mountain Dew? does Sierra Mist even have Caffeine in it?

    I prefer it over every other beverage known to man. Nothing says satisfaction than some Whitefin Tuna and a tall glass of Sierra Mist.
  18. Pete Green African Astronaut
    I think i'll go buy some Smoked Salmon and make avocado toast. the avocados that are organic never ripen. I fucking hate that. they're so expensive. I have to buy the regular ones and make sure they're nearly ripe. I'v placed them in brown bags and still they won't ripen evenly this year as opposed to earlier years. don't know what the fuck is going on with these fucking things. Tillimook Sharp is the best. smoked salmon on avocado-cheese toasted garlic and onion bagel is fucking King!
  19. Pete Green African Astronaut
    Originally posted by mmQ I prefer it over every other beverage known to man. Nothing says satisfaction than some Whitefin Tuna and a tall glass of Sierra Mist.

    Blue fin tuna is King. 5000 bux a pound. and a Mountain Dew with a shot of 7
  20. Originally posted by Pete Green LOL it should be Bacon 7 dollars. Avacado Toast add 5 dollars. seems backwards, doesn't it. based on price

    No. The only thing that's $7 is the bacon + toast

    the 7 should not be on there at all. I think the philosophy for prices is you always want to show the smallest number possible

    like you're not buying a $1000 computer and a $500 printer it's actually $499.95 printer and a $999 computer and you never want to mention that you will probably be spending over $1000 to get this .

    lol when I worked at a petstore we had something like 300%-500% markup on the items and we would literally just make up the prices based on nothing but what we think people would be most likely to not go OH MY GOD and even sometimes people would be like OH MY GOD $30 FOR THIS THING and I would pull out the order sheet and be like look man, we only make like a few dollars selling this honestly it's as good a deal as you're gonna find, maybe a big box store might have it cheaper but you would almost be spending more in gas money versus our pretty fair markup
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