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Do you steal?

  1. #41
    Originally posted by reject The key is to not get caught, and quit when you do.

    I'll happily take a simple caution for like 70 litres of vodka

    70 litres of Vodka (lets say grey goose) = $2100 = grand larceny
  2. #42
    Not if you only get caught for 1
  3. #43
    wat
  4. #44
    cerakote African Astronaut
    i got fired from my first job for stealing a pack of cigarettes and i had already got caught doing it before that

    they thought they got one over on me but jokes on them, i stole countless cans of snuff and packs of cigarettes, cigars, rolling papers etc. like 6 months of heavy tobacco consumption, none of it paid for. id smoke a pack and dip a can a day and didnt cost me a fucking dime

    i used to get drunk every day at work at the owners expense, id bring home 40s of mickeys, 12 packs of bud light, cans of various beers and 4lokos, etc home. not even counting all the beers ive slammed while in the walk-in. i remember id get drunk in the cooler and eat honey buns in there lmao

    many a can of redbull or monster got slammed in there too

    i used to pick cans out of the trash when i took it out and make scrap money from it

    a pound of aluminum at least a day and gave me something to do at home

  5. #45
    Originally posted by cerakote i got fired from my first job for stealing a pack of cigarettes and i had already got caught doing it before that

    they thought they got one over on me but jokes on them, i stole countless cans of snuff and packs of cigarettes, cigars, rolling papers etc. like 6 months of heavy tobacco consumption, none of it paid for. id smoke a pack and dip a can a day and didnt cost me a fucking dime

    i used to get drunk every day at work at the owners expense, id bring home 40s of mickeys, 12 packs of bud light, cans of various beers and 4lokos, etc home. not even counting all the beers ive slammed while in the walk-in. i remember id get drunk in the cooler and eat honey buns in there lmao

    many a can of redbull or monster got slammed in there too

    i used to pick cans out of the trash when i took it out and make scrap money from it

    a pound of aluminum at least a day and gave me something to do at home

    Congrats on ur early death
  6. #46
    cerakote African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Captain Falcon Congrats on ur early death

    well met
  7. #47
    Originally posted by Captain Falcon wat

    You don't do it all at one time, I don't have a bag that big
  8. #48
    Originally posted by reject You don't do it all at one time, I don't have a bag that big

    sounds like a 70x chance of getting caught.
  9. #49
    Not really, shoplifting is easy, you can put shit in your bag right in front of customers and staff and nobody notices
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  10. #50
    bling bling Dark Matter
    1` time wen i was judst a little noob we jumpd owt on bikes and he rodded a bike he just dashed his bike in sum bushes and croppd the lock an we chipped and left the helmet lmao
  11. #51
    Originally posted by reject Not really, shoplifting is easy, you can put shit in your bag right in front of customers and staff and nobody notices

    Well apparently not, since so many of you niggers keep getting caught lol.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37WcZjcbjP4
  12. #52
    There's probably about a 1-1.5% chance of being caught
  13. #53
    Originally posted by reject There's probably about a 1-1.5% chance of being caught

    I want to see your math
  14. #54
    Originally posted by Bill Krozby dude you sound like a pussy, I stole over a thousand dollars over 7 months which isnt that much and we all did it together and there was plenty of other things to get fired for at that place.

    One of the managers called me a few days ago to see how I was doing and said that she misses me and will be sending out my tax info soon. I was actually a really good employee.

    >good employee

    >stole 'over a thousand dollars'

    Pick one.

    Believe it or not Bill Krozby, some people make an honest living by simply working hard and not stealing.
  15. #55
    Originally posted by Discount Whore >good employee

    >stole 'over a thousand dollars'

    Pick one.

    I bet he gave his boss a $10,000 blowjob though.
  16. #56
    Seriously though the level of delusion in these justifications is mindblowing. At least for reject who lives in the UK it's just a slap on the wrist if you get caught. Bill Krozby risked several years of incarceration for $1,000. You could easily make 3x in a year that by just picking up a side job refinishing old furniture from flea markets and selling it at premium on Craigslist and the like. Very easy, rewarding work.
  17. #57
    Originally posted by Discount Whore Seriously though the level of delusion in these justifications is mindblowing. At least for reject who lives in the UK it's just a slap on the wrist if you get caught. Bill Krozby risked several years of incarceration for $1,000. You could easily make 3x in a year that by just picking up a side job refinishing old furniture from flea markets and selling it at premium on Craigslist and the like. Very easy, rewarding work.

    Yeah but that would require learning a skill, doing honest work, and being a positive contributor to society... and we can't be having that now, can we?
  18. #58
    Originally posted by Discount Whore At least for reject who lives in the UK it's just a slap on the wrist if you get caught.

    They even gave me my stolen wine back lol
  19. #59
    blackbird Tuskegee Airman
    I steal if I see an opportunity to. I only shoplift really, I don’t steal from individual people. There’s like a sense of accomplishment when you lift something that you just don’t feel when I just buy it.

    When I was in school I was kinda a klepto. I used to steal random shit from class that I would never have any use for. I did steal a TI-83, probably the best thing I ever got from there.
  20. #60
    Originally posted by blackbird I steal if I see an opportunity to. I only shoplift really, I don’t steal from individual people. There’s like a sense of accomplishment when you lift something that you just don’t feel when I just buy it.

    When I was in school I was kinda a klepto. I used to steal random shit from class that I would never have any use for. I did steal a TI-83, probably the best thing I ever got from there.

    In my senior year of highschool I for some reason had my friend's calculator. I think he told me to hold onto it because he didn't have a backpack or something, and then forgot he did, and I forgot he did. I took it home and it sat in my schoolbag for two years before I figured it out, remembered he was an asshole anyway and sold it on ebay. I think it was a silver TI-83 though I'm not 100% that wasn't the one that was mine since I sold both of them.

    This is your calculator on drugs.
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