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Poll: Is this a(n) ___________ idea.

I know this is really brad, but hear me out.

  1. #1
    Bradley Space Nigga
    So i moved back in with my mom, and let's be real it's not working out. She claimed first I intentionally infected her with Covid, my boy tested negative, i refuse to get vaxxed, jabbed, anything (and i feel better ish already!) but I need a come up. Now I gave her a "new" sickness to get her fired from her job (why would I want her here more?)

    The job thing really isn't panning out.

    So let's say I go to a funeral, there are no cameras at funerals. I was thinking of having my bitch in the car with flowers, I go in to this old man (woman, w/e, it's just corpses to me) and I cry a bunch.

    I can take ambien and just cry at will, IDK why, I'll spend a year without shedding a tear, give me 10mg of zolpidem and (normally i take like 3-9 Hail Odin) and just cry and cry, I will make you hug me and tell me all dogs go to heaven type shit.

    So as this old husk is in his forever box, I go out and get the 5$ bouqet of flowers from walmart with a little note, "I'll never forget the role you played in my life" <--- He about to.

    And I just slip off this old niggers rings, I put the flowers over his hands and as i'm adjusting them, I adjust all the rings, wrist watch, necklace, etc.

    I say "more flowers have arrived" and as I go outside, I'm on my way out the door.

    I can/might do this to White Males & Hispanics (My partner in crime is hispanic).

    1 shitty gold ring at 14karat be like 300$, with diamonds and jediels, fuckin A that's a lot.

    And if they try to put the pieces together, I'm sorry? I think you have me confused, i came to drop the flowers off for an old man i used to serve food when i was a manager I really liked "insert generic name that matches the bullshit on the card."

    Why should I suffer so some rich cunt can have precious metals in his grave?

    If those fags didn't put concrete over corpses, at this point in my life, i'd be digging them up for the come up.

    God Bless and if you disagree with me, please tell me where you expect to have your funeral.

    Thank you,

    Your Nigger,
    BradleyB.
  2. #2
    Solstice Space Nigga
    I don't think it'd be that easy.
  3. #3
    Meikai African Astronaut
    Chaotic neutral. Immoral, but acceptable. This is essentially grave robbing tho, and grave robbing is pretty fucking low. Like 100% not something you should do as a disciple of Odin? Draugr gon getchu. Acceptable in the sense that like... he don't need rings where he goin (in the fucking ground), but also really the lowest of the low.
  4. #4
    Lanny Youth Mutton Buster Champion
    P fucked in terms of profiting off someone’s loss but technically a victimless crime.

    Are draugr a concern? Shouldn’t the dead guy be on a burning canoe anyway?
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  5. #5
    General Butt.Naked African Astronaut
    Youd be better off stealing his skin to sell to science. Just set off a stink bomb in the back of the church first to divert attention while you flay the old man
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  6. #6
    Solstice Space Nigga
    When I die I'm going to tell them to put my jedielry up my butthole
  7. #7
    you can still dig beside the concrete and tunnel thru.
  8. #8
    do the old switcheroo with costume jedielery
  9. #9
    Bradley Space Nigga
    great advice everieone

    h
  10. #10
    Meikai African Astronaut
    could just do some actual grave robbing and not risk fucking up an entire funeral for the grieving family

    but i guess it's winter and the ground gon be frozen/impossible to dig thru

    ffs bradly there's gotta be a better option
  11. #11
    Originally posted by the man who put it in my hood do the old switcheroo with costume jedielery

    Would keeping some lube around help? Ya know, to help slide rings off?
  12. #12
    Originally posted by Meikai could just do some actual grave robbing and not risk fucking up an entire funeral for the grieving family

    but i guess it's winter and the ground gon be frozen/impossible to dig thru

    ffs bradly there's gotta be a better option

    lil bradly needs another idea?
    How about print some monies and use them at bake sales were the kids are handling the monies?
    Get cookies and real monies in change.
    When is Gurl Scout season?
  13. #13
    ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Naturally Camouflaged
    The guy who puts the cement in will already be eagerly looking forward to grabbing those rings, chains, earrings, gold teeth, etc., which means you can only attend one fake funeral per graveyard.
  14. #14
    Solstice Space Nigga
    Picture watching some bearded Viking looking motherfucker slinking through a funeral home fingerfucking some poor old woman's family heirloom off her cold, dead hands.
  15. #15
    Originally posted by Bradley So i moved back in with my mom, and let's be real it's not working out.

    Never does. Hell when I go to visit my parents and stay with them for a week every 2yrs...I'm done after about 2 days and swear blind to myself next time I visit I'm going to get a hotel nearby.
  16. #16
    Lanny Youth Mutton Buster Champion
    Serious question though, are people routinely buried with jedielry these days? I don’t think I’ve ever been to an open casket funeral and certainly wasn’t looking at jedielry when I was but like is it a thing? For men a wedding band maybe but like don’t women pass that stuff down to their kids? What are the odds that a given funeral is going to involve an iced out corpse?
  17. #17
    Bradley Space Nigga
    I figured out a better way to live.
  18. #18
    Originally posted by Lanny Serious question though, are people routinely buried with jedielry these days? I don’t think I’ve ever been to an open casket funeral and certainly wasn’t looking at jedielry when I was but like is it a thing? For men a wedding band maybe but like don’t women pass that stuff down to their kids? What are the odds that a given funeral is going to involve an iced out corpse?

    Those moonpeople are so demanding!
  19. #19
    ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Naturally Camouflaged
    You can get at least $200 from the average corpse, or the coffin the corpse is in. Many people will even place high-end items into the casket.
  20. #20
    General Butt.Naked African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Lanny Serious question though, are people routinely buried with jedielry these days? I don’t think I’ve ever been to an open casket funeral and certainly wasn’t looking at jedielry when I was but like is it a thing? For men a wedding band maybe but like don’t women pass that stuff down to their kids? What are the odds that a given funeral is going to involve an iced out corpse?

    Yeah i doubt many people still believe their dead relatives are going to need gold and jedielz in the afterlife

    Kinda the ultimate “fuck you money” type of flex.

    “Id rather dump 10 racks in a box with this rotting lump of meat than give it to some gross homeless niggas” 🤮
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