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How many 5 year olds could you defeat with your bare hands?

  1. #1
    mmG African Astronaut
    In this version of the game, you dropped into a large square featureless room with your stated number of 5 year olds all standing around the walls.

    When the whistle blows, they all attack you.

    How many 5 year olds can you successfully beat in this scenario?
  2. #2
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Why is every thread on this site about beating off 5 year olds?
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  3. #3
    mmG African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Sudo Why is every thread on this site about beating off 5 year olds?

    5 year-olds? You must be weak.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  4. #4
    Narc Naturally Camouflaged [connect my yokel-like scolytidae]
    Originally posted by Sudo Why is every thread on this site about beating off 5 year olds?

    I see wut you did thar

    Coz it full of fucking pedos


    .
  5. #5
    DontTellEm Black Hole
    Durr can u stand up to a five year old??
    Frickin clown
  6. #6
    DontTellEm Black Hole
    Durrr if I wear a bomb the class … durr kill your self, oh wait faggot 🙄
  7. #7
    Originally posted by Sudo Why is every thread on this site about beating off 5 year olds?

    5 year olds are ideal age for jedi trainings.

    and also bacha bazi trainings.
  8. #8
    Originally posted by DontTellEm Durr can u stand up to a five year old??
    Frickin clown

    i only have errections for girls.
  9. #9
    DontTellEm Black Hole
    Kinda positive u can’t even get it up then, little dick
  10. #10
    mmG African Astronaut
    Chinese have mosquito dick, they literally penetrate their targets and object their superm MRNA 5G eggs.
  11. #11
    Originally posted by mmG Chinese have mosquito dick, they literally penetrate their targets and object their superm MRNA 5G eggs.

    ↑ dalit be jelly of wholesome, unmutilated penises.
  12. #12
    Originally posted by DontTellEm Kinda positive u can’t even get it up then, little dick

    not with you.

    nein.
  13. #13
    30-35
  14. #14
    STER0S Space Nigga [the disappointingly unanticipated slab]
    too many variables to fucking consider

    or perhaps im over thinking it
  15. #15
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Narc I see wut you did thar

    Coz it full of fucking pedos


    .



    Originally posted by mmG 5 year-olds? You must be weak.

    But do you see what he did there?


    My answer is 22.

    I have no idea why other than it's my favorite number and seems reasonable without being .. pretentious or something. I'd like to say 100 but I'm trying to be realistic.

    I think Joe Rogan was asked this and he said 100 . Not this exactly but idk he was all weirdly confident that he could destroy dozens and dozens of kids attacking him at once , but it was really obvious that he was trying to sound cool when in fact he knows he would get his ass kicked at the end of the day. You just can't beat numbers (unless they're babies and toddlers I suppose but even still.

    Like I would also think I could take on a bunch of WOLVES since I'd just kick em really hard as they come at me but no they would just keep coming and it wouldn't take long for them to overwhelm and kill me, as a matter of fact I'm not even sure I could defeat one single wolf by myself but I like to think I could.

    But yeah, probably 22 5 year olds
  16. #16
    Meikai Heck This Schlong
    Originally posted by mmQ My answer is 22.

    I have no idea why other than it's my favorite number and seems reasonable without being .. pretentious or something.



    you fucking fuck that's my psychosis number of choice
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  17. #17
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by Meikai

    you fucking fuck that's my psychosis number of choice

    Jeez I'm sorry. Why doesn't that make you happy ?
  18. #18
    Meikai Heck This Schlong
    how determined are they? have they had any coaching? did their parents regularly beat the shit out of them before showing up in the battle cube? how hardened are their spirits? how much resolve do they have? whatever... my answer is like... 7 kids? maybe. maybe not even that many idk. if 7 five year olds all rushed me at the same time and started biting me... yeah idk. i don't think it'd take that many rly. im picturing scenarios where they straight up take me down like a pack of wolves. as long as they're biting and clawing and going for my throat/eyes with pure animal fury, i'm probably fuckin' done for.

    Originally posted by mmQ Jeez I'm sorry. Why doesn't that make you happy ?

    OH, it doesn't make me UNHAPPY. It just reminds me that that number is a number is a number is a number and I start to remember.
  19. #19
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    I ALREADY DID THE WOLF COMPARISON FIND YOUR OWN COMPARISON
  20. #20
    Meikai Heck This Schlong
    Originally posted by mmQ I ALREADY DID THE WOLF COMPARISON FIND YOUR OWN COMPARISON

    haha fuck

    like a... school of hungry piranha
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