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Gonna apply to the most pristigious cop outfit in the country.

  1. #1
    A College Professor victim of incest [your moreover breastless limestone]
    The Los Angeles Police Department im going to start out at the bottom and drive a car around in circles looking for crime wearing a bulletproof vest it will be nice because i can park in fire zones and shit when i get my hawaiin shirts from the dry cleaners and ill always be stopping for coffees and donuts to keep my senses on high-alert until i find a fucking citizen in distress and i can go assist them or if they wanna smart off maybe they need the tar kicked out of them. im going to drive the wheels off that car hitting the rev limiter everyday " i dunno captain i dont know why the engine popped they dont make em like they used to huh" that way i can get desk duty and look at the secretaries tits when im nursing a hangover and i dont want to get motion sick from driving in circles

    ill go to beverly hills and tell them im a top cop in LA to see if they roll out the red carpet for me but eventually thats where i wanna hang my hat that or the LA county sherrifs office driving one of the military trucks in circles. when they go on the radio and say WE HAVE CRIME and i answer ill identify myself as MAGNUMCOP which the dispatchers will love and give me all the good calls
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  2. #2
    IS THAT CHIPS???
  3. #3
    A College Professor victim of incest [your moreover breastless limestone]
    well around here we just call them fries but back in the old country i think thats what they call em

    i guess in some other country if u order chips and salsa its fries with tomatoe suace because there culture is different and they dont have the technology to make tortilla chips over there
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  4. #4
    sorry i meant CHPs

  5. #5
    My friend gets pulled over by the chips all the time they are th nicest cops they always give my friend free ice cream and said " hey you were the only driver brave enough to pass me and I commend you for you're bravery. I have just bought this tub of ice cream before the end of my shift when my captain told me I have to work late so I have to get rid of this ice cream so it don't melt so I would like to give it to you brave citizen". Just the nicest bunch of cops. But it's getting ridiculous my friend is diabetes and he's fat and lactose retarded and he's getting a bit of ice cream overload but then again he's too nice to turn down free dessert plus he doesn't want to offend the chips.

    Did you know if you go to Asia and you're eating at someone's house your supposed to leave some on the plate when ur done so I show that you had your fill that way the man of the house knows he did you a solid and macho-ly fed you all you could eat it's like that
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  6. #6
    Originally posted by I Live In Your Crawlspace Secretly4 Did you know if you go to Asia and you're eating at someone's house your supposed to leave some on the plate when ur done so I show that you had your fill that way the man of the house knows he did you a solid and macho-ly fed you all you could eat it's like that

    what a waste!
  7. #7
    Originally posted by the man who put it in my hood what a waste!

    Yeah those Asians are so wasteful they might do well to learn a thing or two from the brown man
  8. #8
    no wonder they have constant famine they can't even finish a plate smh
  9. #9
    Originally posted by A College Professor The Los Angeles Police Department im going to start out at the bottom and drive a car around in circles looking for crime

    That's not the bottom, you don't get to drive for 2yrs...you get the bitch seat and have to go into the 7/11 for the dognuts and coffee
  10. #10
    I do that already for free

    The neighborhood would have less crime if they paid me to keep the peace and I live right next to a police station, they don't do anything. I saw them use 7 squad cars to bust ONE GUY who was yelling about face diapers and they called an ambulance and the girl LITERALLY PUT A BANDAID ON HIM THATS ALL SHE DID and then the cops spent an hour digging through the garbage in the back alley.

    I saw them open a random bag in the alley that came from my bathroom trash and started digging through toilet paper rolls and pull out a bunch of hair?????? like what the actual fuck???? I think they were looking for cocaine.

    Or maybe that shirtless guy threw some stuff in my trash because sometimes people shoot up on our fire escape.

    I would just whack all of these people with a large stick and tell them to get lost... doesn't take me an hour of digging through trash to clean up the REAL TRASH OF GARBAGE PEOPLE ON THE STREETS
  11. #11
    A College Professor victim of incest [your moreover breastless limestone]
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson That's not the bottom, you don't get to drive for 2yrs…you get the bitch seat and have to go into the 7/11 for the dognuts and coffee

    thats even better, traffic sucks ass anyway im not sure how being chauffered around like royalty is being a bitch its more like the king's seat if you ask me now stfu and give me some money for coffee bitch driver
  12. #12
    hey man we gotta call throw that coffee out and say "shit thats the third time today" and when it's just two teenagers stealing connies you say WHAT THE FUCK I THREW OUT COFFEE FOR THIS??! YOU LITTLE SHIT!
  13. #13
    Quick Mix Ready Space Nigga [jealously defalcate my upanishad]
    Originally posted by A College Professor The Los Angeles Police Department im going to start out at the bottom and drive a car around in circles looking for crime wearing a bulletproof vest it will be nice because i can park in fire zones and shit when i get my hawaiin shirts from the dry cleaners and ill always be stopping for coffees and donuts to keep my senses on high-alert until i find a fucking citizen in distress and i can go assist them or if they wanna smart off maybe they need the tar kicked out of them. im going to drive the wheels off that car hitting the rev limiter everyday " i dunno captain i dont know why the engine popped they dont make em like they used to huh" that way i can get desk duty and look at the secretaries tits when im nursing a hangover and i dont want to get motion sick from driving in circles

    ill go to beverly hills and tell them im a top cop in LA to see if they roll out the red carpet for me but eventually thats where i wanna hang my hat that or the LA county sherrifs office driving one of the military trucks in circles. when they go on the radio and say WE HAVE CRIME and i answer ill identify myself as MAGNUMCOP which the dispatchers will love and give me all the good calls

    Read this listening to Curtis Mayfield -Pusherman.

    Good read to the right tune.
  14. #14
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    What are you going to do when you have an active shooter?
  15. #15
    after I'm on the scene he is gonna be a shooter on life support
  16. #16
    Originally posted by A College Professor The Los Angeles Police Department

    They all wear skirts now don't they?
  17. #17
    Quick Mix Ready Space Nigga [jealously defalcate my upanishad]
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson They all wear skirts now don't they?

    say that to their face. especially the ones on motorcycles :D
  18. #18
    Originally posted by the man who put it in my hood hey man we gotta call throw that coffee out and say "shit thats the third time today" and when it's just two teenagers stealing connies you say WHAT THE FUCK I THREW OUT COFFEE FOR THIS??! YOU LITTLE SHIT!

    I don't know why they don't have cup holders in cop cars if this keeps happening.
  19. #19
    Originally posted by Quick Mix Ready say that to their face. especially the ones on motorcycles :D

    As opposed to saying it to their Elbow??
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