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Supermarket self checkout machines

  1. #21
    Bradley Black Hole
    if you get a job at the grocery store you get 10% off, so basically you could buy 1 item and shove 50-55 in your coworkers back pack. ask them for a ride to your mom's (I write this assuming you are living with a biological parent you won't seperate from the nipple of, & she doesn't let you use "the family" car), while theey're driving say you left something in their bag (????), if you work 2nd or 3rd shift it will be too dark for them to see what you are grabbing out of the bag, if you work 1st shift you must give them 1/50-55th of total merchandise stolen, this is referred to as "Shrinkage" in your business. And if you ever ever ever get caught, explain the oldest male employee there was molesting you and paying you in goods from the store that he paid for with his 10% off coupon and stuffing into other employees backpacks and using them as mules, PROFIT
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  2. #22
    Originally posted by Bradley if you get a job at the grocery store you get 10% off, so basically you could buy 1 item and shove 50-55 in your coworkers back pack. ask them for a ride to your mom's (I write this assuming you are living with a biological parent you won't seperate from the nipple of, & she doesn't let you use "the family" car), while theey're driving say you left something in their bag (????), if you work 2nd or 3rd shift it will be too dark for them to see what you are grabbing out of the bag, if you work 1st shift you must give them 1/50-55th of total merchandise stolen, this is referred to as "Shrinkage" in your business. And if you ever ever ever get caught, explain the oldest male employee there was molesting you and paying you in goods from the store that he paid for with his 10% off coupon and stuffing into other employees backpacks and using them as mules, PROFIT

    OKAY, THIS IS EPIC
  3. #23
    Obbe Alan What? [annoy my right-angled speediness]
    For sure, you just have to build a Bread Box.

    Essentially, the bread box is a device used to fool the grocery store into thinking you are depositing coins into a self-checkout machine. Every time you drop a coin into a self-checkout machine, the machine signals the type of coin inserted with one or more bursts of a combination of 1700hz and 2200hz.

    Operation is simple. Simply scan your purchase, wait for the computer to demand your cash, and press the "deposit" button on the bread box for each coin you want to simulate. The coin signals are coupled from the bread box into the machine with a small speaker held to the self-checkout machine.

    Each time the pushbutton is pressed, it triggers half of IC1, configured as a monostable multivibrator to energize the rest of the circuit for a length of time determined by the setting of the coin selector switch. This in turn starts the other half of IC1, configured as an astable multivibrator, pulsing on and off at regular intervals at a rate determined by the 50k pot between pins 12 and 13. The output of the astable thus alternately powers of IC2, configured as a square wave oscillator, providing the required 1700hz and 2200hz to the op amp which acts as a buffer to drive the speaker.

    I've added some schematics at the end, but assemble the circuit as you wish. Component placement is not critical. I found the easiest method was to use point-to-point wiring on a "universal" PC grid board with solder ringed holes. Use sockets if you aren't a whiz with a soldering iron. Be sure to leave easy access to the potentiometers for alignment.

    For alignment, a frequency counter and tiggered sweep oscilloscope are extremely handy (but not absolutely necessary.)

    Install a temporary jumper from +9v supply to pin 14 of IC2 and temporarily disconnect the 0.01uF capacitors from pins 5 and 9 of IC2. Power up the circuit. Measuring the output from pin 5 of IC2 with the frequency counter, adjust the 20k pot between pins 1 and 6 for an output of 1700hz. Now adjust the 20k pot between pins 8 and 13 for an outputbof 2200hz from pin 9 of IC2. Remove the temporary jumper and re-attach the capacitors to pins 5 and 9. (Note: if no frequency counter is available, the outputs can be adjusted by ear one at a time by zero-beating the output tone with a computer generated tone of known precision.)

    Next, temporarily disconnect the wire between pins 5 and 10 of IC1. Set coin selector switch in the "N" (nickel) position. With the oscilloscope measuring the output from pin 9 of IC1, adjust the 50k pot between pins 12 and 13 of IC1 for output pulses of 60 millisecond duration. Reconnect the wire between pins 5 and 10. (Note: If no scope is available, adjust the pulse rate by ear using computer generated tones for comparison.)

    The remaining adjustments are made by ear.

    Leave the selector switch in the "N" position. Adjust the 50k pot labelled "Dime" for a quick double beep each time the pushbutton is pressed.

    Finally, set the selector to "Quarter". Adjust the 50k pot labelled "Quarter" until exactly 5 very quick beeps are heard for each button press. Don't worry if the quarter beeps sound shorter and faster than the nickel and dime ones. They should be.

    If all went well to this point, your bread box should be completely aligned and functional. Happy shopping, and enjoy all that extra "bread".

    Schematics:
  4. #24
    Originally posted by Obbe For sure, you just have to build a Bread Box.

    Essentially, the bread box is a device used to fool the grocery store into thinking you are depositing coins into a self-checkout machine. Every time you drop a coin into a self-checkout machine, the machine signals the type of coin inserted with one or more bursts of a combination of 1700hz and 2200hz.

    Operation is simple. Simply scan your purchase, wait for the computer to demand your cash, and press the "deposit" button on the bread box for each coin you want to simulate. The coin signals are coupled from the bread box into the machine with a small speaker held to the self-checkout machine.

    Each time the pushbutton is pressed, it triggers half of IC1, configured as a monostable multivibrator to energize the rest of the circuit for a length of time determined by the setting of the coin selector switch. This in turn starts the other half of IC1, configured as an astable multivibrator, pulsing on and off at regular intervals at a rate determined by the 50k pot between pins 12 and 13. The output of the astable thus alternately powers of IC2, configured as a square wave oscillator, providing the required 1700hz and 2200hz to the op amp which acts as a buffer to drive the speaker.

    I've added some schematics at the end, but assemble the circuit as you wish. Component placement is not critical. I found the easiest method was to use point-to-point wiring on a "universal" PC grid board with solder ringed holes. Use sockets if you aren't a whiz with a soldering iron. Be sure to leave easy access to the potentiometers for alignment.

    For alignment, a frequency counter and tiggered sweep oscilloscope are extremely handy (but not absolutely necessary.)

    Install a temporary jumper from +9v supply to pin 14 of IC2 and temporarily disconnect the 0.01uF capacitors from pins 5 and 9 of IC2. Power up the circuit. Measuring the output from pin 5 of IC2 with the frequency counter, adjust the 20k pot between pins 1 and 6 for an output of 1700hz. Now adjust the 20k pot between pins 8 and 13 for an outputbof 2200hz from pin 9 of IC2. Remove the temporary jumper and re-attach the capacitors to pins 5 and 9. (Note: if no frequency counter is available, the outputs can be adjusted by ear one at a time by zero-beating the output tone with a computer generated tone of known precision.)

    Next, temporarily disconnect the wire between pins 5 and 10 of IC1. Set coin selector switch in the "N" (nickel) position. With the oscilloscope measuring the output from pin 9 of IC1, adjust the 50k pot between pins 12 and 13 of IC1 for output pulses of 60 millisecond duration. Reconnect the wire between pins 5 and 10. (Note: If no scope is available, adjust the pulse rate by ear using computer generated tones for comparison.)

    The remaining adjustments are made by ear.

    Leave the selector switch in the "N" position. Adjust the 50k pot labelled "Dime" for a quick double beep each time the pushbutton is pressed.

    Finally, set the selector to "Quarter". Adjust the 50k pot labelled "Quarter" until exactly 5 very quick beeps are heard for each button press. Don't worry if the quarter beeps sound shorter and faster than the nickel and dime ones. They should be.

    If all went well to this point, your bread box should be completely aligned and functional. Happy shopping, and enjoy all that extra "bread".

    Schematics:

    Okay §m£ÂgØL Jr. Lets keep you're little outbursts to the meathead thread next time mmkay
  5. #25
    Obbe Alan What? [annoy my right-angled speediness]
    Originally posted by I Live In Your Crawlspace Secretly4 Okay §m£ÂgØL Jr. Lets keep you're little outbursts to the meathead thread next time mmkay

    Or you could build yourself a breadbox and enjoy all that bread.
  6. #26
    Solstice Naturally Camouflaged
    I like to get the expensive apples then use the code for the cheapest apples when I weigh them.
  7. #27
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    LP watches for the receipt that pops out at the end of the transaction. No receipt, no purchase.
  8. #28
    Bugz Space Nigga
    Originally posted by Bradley if you get a job at the grocery store you get 10% off, so basically you could buy 1 item and shove 50-55 in your coworkers back pack. ask them for a ride to your mom's (I write this assuming you are living with a biological parent you won't seperate from the nipple of, & she doesn't let you use "the family" car), while theey're driving say you left something in their bag (????), if you work 2nd or 3rd shift it will be too dark for them to see what you are grabbing out of the bag, if you work 1st shift you must give them 1/50-55th of total merchandise stolen, this is referred to as "Shrinkage" in your business. And if you ever ever ever get caught, explain the oldest male employee there was molesting you and paying you in goods from the store that he paid for with his 10% off coupon and stuffing into other employees backpacks and using them as mules, PROFIT

    hella flagged for L&P

    You're going down, Bradly.
  9. #29
    The self checkout machines are rigged in the dems’ favor, it’s a complete fraud and frankly a disgrace for this country
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  10. #30
    Bradley Black Hole
    Joe Biden and his crime family are stealing all the apric0ts
  11. #31
    Are you Bradley B? I thought u left forever dawg
  12. #32
    SBTlauien African Astronaut
    I ring up gold bars on the self-checkout as bananas.

    4011
  13. #33
    Bradley Black Hole
    Originally posted by Fox Are you Bradley B? I thought u left forever dawg
    Nah bro, I just had to be successful fo ra little bit, now that I"m failing and fucked im back
  14. #34
    Ghost Black Hole
    its fucking annoying. I was in a long line and the lady said "Excuse me sir but did you know the self checkout can speed up your shopping experience!"

    and I was like you gotta be fucking kidding me.

    I couldn't even find the barcode on half the shit so I did what I learned in school "if you can't do it, move on to the next one and then come back to it later" well I found all the other ones but that didn't make finding these barcodes any easier.

    i guess i was holding up the self checkout the lady kept asking if I needed any help like I was an idiot and then i couldn't get the bag unstuck or open and when I tried to pay with the machine it kept saying wrong pin because the debit machine keys were all sticky and it was pressing a number twice

    and then she asked to see my fucking receipt as i walk out with a bag like yeah, i've just been standing there for 5 minutes pretending to pay.

    What happened to SERVICE, fuck self checkout. It's faster with two people.

    Fast = more people in less time which means less people standing around which means less covid infection rates. Hire more cashiers and stick your machines up your ass.

    Every fucking store these days has 7 registers and only opens 2 of them. Relics of pre 2008 culture I guess
  15. #35
    Ghost Black Hole
    also she picked me out of the line and i was standing in the fucking middle.

    shit like that is why I don't want to be alive.
  16. #36
    Bradley Black Hole
    Originally posted by Ghost also she picked me out of the line and i was standing in the fucking middle.

    shit like that is why I don't want to be alive.

    what do you look like IRL
  17. #37
    Ghost Black Hole
    like iggy pop but uglier with meth scars and a bugged out popeye and I dress like a ninja in a rabbit hat and anime shirts
  18. #38
    Bugz Space Nigga
    Originally posted by Bradley Nah bro, I just had to be successful fo ra little bit, now that I"m failing and fucked im back

    the world is failing. the big leveler of equalization is upon us. all people will become equal and destruction and meltdown sees no favorite in end times
  19. #39
    A College Professor victim of incest [your moreover breastless limestone]
    Originally posted by Ghost its fucking annoying. I was in a long line and the lady said "Excuse me sir but did you know the self checkout can speed up your shopping experience!"

    and I was like you gotta be fucking kidding me.

    I couldn't even find the barcode on half the shit so I did what I learned in school "if you can't do it, move on to the next one and then come back to it later" well I found all the other ones but that didn't make finding these barcodes any easier.

    i guess i was holding up the self checkout the lady kept asking if I needed any help like I was an idiot and then i couldn't get the bag unstuck or open and when I tried to pay with the machine it kept saying wrong pin because the debit machine keys were all sticky and it was pressing a number twice

    and then she asked to see my fucking receipt as i walk out with a bag like yeah, i've just been standing there for 5 minutes pretending to pay.

    What happened to SERVICE, fuck self checkout. It's faster with two people.

    Fast = more people in less time which means less people standing around which means less covid infection rates. Hire more cashiers and stick your machines up your ass.

    Every fucking store these days has 7 registers and only opens 2 of them. Relics of pre 2008 culture I guess

    yeah franky pretty much, i think they put all those lanes up there as a psy op to plant the idea in our heads ( in the top secret back part of the brain ) that they are ready for EVERYTHING no matter how many customers and they must know whats best and how to staff it yet they only ever use 10 or 20 percent of the registers, which just goes to prove that its a big big scam. im not buying into it, if i want to check myself out ill shop online. i mean the store only has the bullshit crap that theyre shilling for , if i shop online atleast i actually get to pick what i want not what they got their jediscam bargain of the week on . HEY SUPPLIER YOU"RE TOO EXPENSIVE WE WILL JUST GET THE SHITTIER VERSION IF YOU DONT WANNA PLSAY BALL. yet i dont want their knockoff junk crap revolving door of jedilery. okay?? is that okay thanks but no thanks ill just decide what i want and order it and it will show up on my doorstep and it will be what i want not what you want. ok?

    im going to change the industry
  20. #40
    Originally posted by Fox The self checkout machines are rigged in the dems’ favor, it’s a complete fraud and frankly a disgrace for this country

    I thought jokes were supposed to be funny
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