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I just burnt the fuck out of my leg with a fucking pasty ffs

  1. #41
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    Originally posted by Bill Krozby and you're talking like you're a heroin fiend at the end of his wits. your whole story is of a dubious nature. I call bullshit

    ok



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  2. #42
    benny vader YELLOW GHOST
    Originally posted by NARCassist was just in town and went to buy a coke coz i was thirsty. anyway they were selling pasties and shit which looked pretty nice. they had it were they were all out in a hot cabinet and you put one into a paper bag and go pay for it. so i put one in a bag, went round the shelf and slipped it in my waistband coz its hot and all i was wearing was jeans and a tee, so nowhere else to conceal it. so i goes picks up a coke and went to pay for the coke but this pasty is starting to feel a bit too hot around my belt. so i was using my hand to try and hold it away from my skin a bit so it wouldn't get so hot while i waited to pay. next thing i know my finger went straight through the paper bag and the pasty and its all falling apart and starting to burn my nuts. so i ducked back round the shelf putting the coke down on the side to go sort it out where they wouldn't see that i'd just tried to steal one of their pasties. and its all starting to fall down my leg now. and the filling is hot as fuck. so i try to let it all fall down the leg of my jeans but these tight jeans these days, it got half way down my calf and all got stuck there. and now its burning my leg to fuck so i've just squished it down and out the bottom of my jeans and just left it on the floor. hopefully they'll think somebody just dropped a pasty on the floor and it got trod on or summing. anyway so now i thought i'll just buy this coke and get the fuck out. but as i'm going back to where the coke was i'm thinking where did i put that £10 note, and i'm checking all my pockets just as i hear a guy at the cashier saing 'somebody just left this bottle of coke and ten pound note on the side', so i quickly called it as mine, paid for the coke and got the fuck out. i had to go and get some envelopes and copier paper so i was rushing to get them so i could get home to check my leg coz it was burning like fuck now. anyway i got home, ripped my clothes off and got in the shower. there is a huge blister bigger than a tennis ball on my calf and its sore as hell now.

    moral of the story is don't go putting hot pasties in your waistband to chore them kids.

    i've got hot pasties like that tons of times and never had anything like that happen tho. that was one seriously fucking hot pasty man.

    i'll take some pics, you guys gotta see this.



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    you should try suing them for not having proper warning labels.
  3. #43
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    read the fred benny, we been over this.



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  4. #44
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  5. #45
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    Originally posted by mmQ





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  6. #46
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    yeah that's right, i just ha ha'd your ha ha sucker.



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  7. #47
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    what you gonna do about it?



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  8. #48
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
  9. #49
    benny vader YELLOW GHOST
    Originally posted by NARCassist read the fred benny, we been over this.

    o i forgot your a british.

    you just slurp it up like a good victim would instead of blaming other people becos britts think like victims.

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  10. #50
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by benny vader o i forgot your a british.

    you just slurp it up like a good victim would instead of blaming other people becos britts think like victims.

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    Blaming them would be the most literal self victimizing thing he could do in this situation.

    You got it twisted yo.

    Twisted and wristed and listed is this kid.
  11. #51
    benny vader YELLOW GHOST
    Originally posted by mmQ Blaming them would be the most literal self victimizing thing he could do in this situation.

    You got it twisted yo.

    Twisted and wristed and listed is this kid.

    i dont think you under how blaming processes go.

    when you blame other people, you shift the victimness to them.
  12. #52
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    No.
  13. #53
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    victims are the ones that start crying and blaming. proper people just get the fuck on with life.

    i could just imagine if this happened to you tho benny..

    'boohoohoo mummy, mummy, the nasty man just made me burn myself, boo hoo hoo, MUUUUUUUURRMMMMMMMMY, BOOHOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, make it better for me mummy, BOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOO'



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  14. #54
    Benny, don't tell me you never spilled a bowl of hot ramen on your noodle.
  15. #55
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    'MUUUUUUUMY ITS NOT FAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIRR, BOOHOOOHOOOO'



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  16. #56
    benny vader YELLOW GHOST
    Originally posted by NARCassist victims are the ones that start crying and blaming. proper people just get the fuck on with life.

    i could just imagine if this happened to you tho benny..

    'boohoohoo mummy, mummy, the nasty man just made me burn myself, boo hoo hoo, MUUUUUUUURRMMMMMMMMY, BOOHOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, make it better for me mummy, BOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOO'

    neither do ''proper people'' go around stealing patsies and getting burned so

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  17. #57
    benny vader YELLOW GHOST
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson Benny, don't tell me you never spilled a bowl of hot ramen on your noodle.

    thank gott i wasnt born a retard.
  18. #58
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by benny vader thank gott i wasnt born a retard.

    I wonder what happened then.

    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  19. #59
    benny vader YELLOW GHOST
    lifestyle choices.
  20. #60
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    Originally posted by benny vader neither do ''proper people'' go around stealing patsies and getting burned so

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    you do what you gotta do to get by. that's the motto i live my life by.



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