I was at work last week and my boss asked me what was wrong with me because I looked like shit and was shaking and let me take of a shot of tequila, I told him because he's a cool guy that I have a problem with drinking and he told me if I need to take some time off for a bit it would be fine and I told him it was cool and finished the shift just barely. I text him the next day when I was off telling him I wanted that time off so I didn't work the last week, and I'm going back in today at 4.
I've always juggled drinking and working for the last few years but the last 2 weeks it got kind of out of hand and I'd feel like trash when I'd wake up and just lay in bed for as long as possible.
For the last 3 months I've been seeing this girl and only her and thats something I haven't done since I was a teenager, but even though I made thread about being an electric being and not using condoms kinda jokingly I honestly fundamentally do believe that there is something to that.
The last 2 girls I was with were all about drinking and fucking and would only call me when they were drunk, which isn't inherently wrong, but they wanted nothing to do with me outside of that, but the girl I see now actually will text me and send me pictures and ask to hang with me. The last couple weeks her mom and sister from DC have been in town to check out her house and visit which is all good and I'm glad that some people are more grounded by family than myself, but I honestly missed seeing her and when I would drink I would get all emo and shit and when I was sober I just felt anxious.
Her mom is leaving and we are going to start hanging again, and despite me feeling lonely I don't act on it. I let her come to me when she's ready.
But I'm going back to work today and I'm not going to drink, I need something more foreboding, with all the disease and war in the world adding an obsession to sex and alcohol is foolish and trashy.
My friend in San Antonio works nights at a clinic for sleep studies and she told me that I have insomnia and even my gf told me a few days ago that I don't get enough sleep. I only sleep for a few hours at a time like Thomas jefferson. And I think its partially due to drinking.
I'm a catholic, and I really need to get back on track to be where I'm supposed to be to have a more honest testimony.
So I went to the store this morning and bought some sunny-D and pack of benadryl to try and curb this addiction. I might leave this job I have an interview that a friend set up for me with this guys carpet cleaning company, he's the second highest rated carpet cleaning man on yelp here in austin. So we will see whats up.
I strongly recommend you sort your drinking out before going to the new job; you have no idea if they're going to be anywhere near as understanding as your current employer
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Let's start with I don't like you, and think you're a pretty big asshole 99% of the time, and yes, I get it, you don't like me for whatever reason. That doesn't matter.
I really do hope you sort out your drinking problem, and get your shit together. Acknowledging you have a problem is the first step... during your week off, what did you do to work on your problem? I really hope it was more than using it as a vacation to continue drinking instead of working through tapering or something that would be positive and helpful...
I'd suggest getting something, gabapentin, even some benzos and use them so you don't seizure while coming off the alcohol, because it's clearly obvious that you are physically dependent at this point. Once you get off, you need to stay away from that shit for a LONG TIME before you fuck with even a drink here and there, because it'll come back to bite you in the ass quicker than you think and becomes a slippery slope. Ask your GF for help... it's always easier getting off of something when you have someone to support you through it.
Hahaha, Bill Krozby just admitted that his own mother thought he was a psychopath and told him straight to his face.
Originally posted by Bill Krozby
my mom and ex gf would say that about me, but people like you like to toss terms around like that for anyone you don't like. I'm an empath