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PSA for all you autistic faggots-Revenge of the Figet Spinner!

  1. #1
    hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    http://nypost.com/2017/05/17/mom-says-a-fidget-spinner-nearly-killed-her-kid/A
    10-year-old Houston girl had a brush with death after swallowing a piece of the latest must-have toy — a fidget spinner.

    Britton Joniec underwent emergency surgery on Monday, according to her mom, who described the terrifying ordeal involving the propeller-shaped contraption

    “On the way home from a fun swim meet, I heard Britton make an odd retching noise in the back seat as I was driving,” Kelly Rose Joniec wrote on Facebook.

    “Looking back in the mirror, I saw her face turning red and drool pouring from her mouth — she could utter noises but looked panicked so I immediately pulled over,” she continued. “She pointed to her throat saying she’d swallowed something, so I attempted Heimlich but there was no resistance.”

    The girl had put one of three bushings from the spinner in her mouth to clean it — but somehow swallowed the metal piece.

    Her mom drove to an urgent care center, where medical workers were unable to determine whether it was lodged in her airway or her esophagus.

    The girl was then rushed to Texas Children’s Hospital in The Woodlands, just north of Houston, where X-rays showed the nickel-size bushing was stuck in her esophagus.

    “The GI doctor was fascinated… he’d only just learned of fidget spinners that morning when he was at the mall with his son, so it was a surprise to be faced with one in a case a few hours later,” Joniec wrote.

    Finally, the doctor used an endoscope to remove the object.

    “Fortunately, we had a positive outcome, but it was pretty scary there for a while,” the mom said.

    Joniec had a word of caution for parents about the toy, which originally was designed as a therapeutic tool for kids with ADHD and autism.

    “Fidget spinners are the current craze so they are widely distributed. Kids of all ages may be getting them, but not all spinners come with age-appropriate warnings,” she said.

    She pointed out that the bushings pop out easily and can pose a potential choking hazard for young children.

    The twirling toys have become so popular lately that they’ve been banned in some schools.


    I've seen a couple Figet Spinner threads lately and thought of you autistic fucks. I know ya'll are retarded but I don't want (most of you) to turn, red, foam at the mouth and die (although, it would be epic lulz and a fitting end to some of you- Lanny, for example. He might be dead already with out this PSA and the slow Siberian shipping on his Figet Spinner he had to have in faggot-autistic-rainbow color).

    You're welcome.
  2. #2
    RisiR † 29 Autism
    Lanny will never get his fucking thing he ordered on Alibaba.
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  3. #3
    hydromorphone victim of incest [insincerely conduce my paisley]
    Good thing - he'd be like this little girl, except he's an autistic lonely faggot who wouldn't have his mommy there to give him the Heimlich maneuver or rush him to the children's hospital.

    Don't come crying to me when one of you faggots chokes in a Figet Spinner bushing... I warned you autistic faggots, I did my part.
  4. #4
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    MORE LIKE FAGET SPANNER

    though I am considering getting one from the high-end chinese knife manufacturers like WE or Stedemon
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  5. #5
    RisiR † 29 Autism
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  6. #6
    RisiR † 29 Autism
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  7. #7
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    related - I really want one of these but I also really don't want to spend $400 on it:

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  8. #8
    RisiR † 29 Autism
    Nice but does it spin my fidgets?

  9. #9
    RisiR † 29 Autism


    That dude is Australien, eh?
  10. #10
    I saw my first fidget spinner in the wild the other day. I don't fucking get it.
  11. #11
    It's like we've gone back to kids playing with fucking pinwheels, like... what?
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  12. #12
    RisiR † 29 Autism
    Originally posted by Phoenix It's like we've gone back to kids playing with fucking pinwheels, like… what?

    Technology advanced at a much faster rate than human biology was able to adapt to it and made all generations that had access to the internet retarded.

    Evolution realized this and gave those really fucked up retard kids born after the year 2000 the attention span of a Guppy so they are mesmerized by spinning wheels and clicking cubes. The next couple of generation will become more and more retarded from fidgeting with all kinds of shit and technology will die down to the point where it has to be rebuilt by a chosen few non-retards. Then the process will repeat itself until the end of times because the singularity has already occured, we were just busy watching weird porn and arguing about bans on forums to realize it.

    This is Posttechnologism. The age of the Mongo Sapiens.
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  13. #13
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Originally posted by RisiR † Technology advanced at a much faster rate than human biology was able to adapt to it and made all generations that had access to the internet retarded.

    Evolution realized this and gave those really fucked up retard kids born after the year 2000 the attention span of a Guppy so they are mesmerized by spinning wheels and clicking cubes. The next couple of generation will become more and more retarded from fidgeting with all kinds of shit and technology will die down to the point where it has to be rebuilt by a chosen few non-retards. Then the process will repeat itself until the end of times because the singularity has already occured, we were just busy watching weird porn and arguing about bans on forums to realize it.

    This is Posttechnologism. The age of the Mongo Sapiens.

    Words more true have never been uttered.
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  14. #14
    infinityshock Black Hole
    Originally posted by hydromorphone Good thing - he'd be like this little girl, except he's an autistic lonely faggot who wouldn't have his mommy there to give him the Heimlich maneuver or rush him to the children's hospital.

    Don't come crying to me when one of you faggots chokes in a Figet Spinner bushing… I warned you autistic faggots, I did my part.

    you would be the expert about choking on things considering your vast experience with deepthroating the dicks of well endowed niggers
  15. #15
    Originally posted by RisiR † Technology advanced at a much faster rate than human biology was able to adapt to it and made all generations that had access to the internet retarded.

    Evolution realized this and gave those really fucked up retard kids born after the year 2000 the attention span of a Guppy so they are mesmerized by spinning wheels and clicking cubes. The next couple of generation will become more and more retarded from fidgeting with all kinds of shit and technology will die down to the point where it has to be rebuilt by a chosen few non-retards. Then the process will repeat itself until the end of times because the singularity has already occured, we were just busy watching weird porn and arguing about bans on forums to realize it.

    This is Posttechnologism. The age of the Mongo Sapiens.

    The invention of the television was the first sign. Social media was the beginning of the end. Video games were the end. Smartphones were the final nail in the coffin.
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  16. #16
    RisiR † 29 Autism
    I kinda like it, though.
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