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When did you last measure your penis?

  1. #1
    Probably when I was like 16 or something
  2. #2
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Did you cheat and measure from the ballsack?
  3. #3
    the man who put it in my hood Black Hole [miraculously counterclaim my golf]
    Penis inspection day
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  4. #4
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by the man who put it in my hood Penis inspection day

    Heard.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  5. #5
    the man who put it in my hood Black Hole [miraculously counterclaim my golf]
  6. #6
    Originally posted by -SpectraL Did you cheat and measure from the ballsack?

    From the anus, right? That's how you're supposed to do it?
  7. #7
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by the man who put it in my hood

    I had penis inspections in high school, performed by a female swimming teacher. She would grab your waistband, pull it out, look down for a few seconds, then say you were good to go.
  8. #8
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by -SpectraL I had penis inspections in high school, performed by a female swimming teacher. She would grab your waistband, pull it out, look down for a few seconds, then say you were good to go.

    post your yearbook photo
  9. #9
    larrylegend8383 Naturally Camouflaged
    Fun fact: Spectral's grandmother loved to teach extracurricular activities so much that she did it for free.
  10. #10
    the man who put it in my hood Black Hole [miraculously counterclaim my golf]
    Originally posted by -SpectraL I had penis inspections in high school, performed by a female swimming teacher. She would grab your waistband, pull it out, look down for a few seconds, then say you were good to go.

    I used to always get boners during penis inspection day and all the girls in the line behind me would laugh and giggle as I walked by blushing with my tent pinched.
  11. #11
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Pitched. Your tent was pitched.
  12. #12
    Originally posted by -SpectraL Pitched. Your tent was pitched.

    No. He meant pinched.
  13. #13
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    What you do is say,"hey! look at that!" and point away, and then when they look, you slip past with your boner.
  14. #14
    Michael Myers victim of incest [divide your nonresilient tucker]
    LMAO what kind of retarded shit is penis inspection day?
  15. #15
    tee hee hee Naturally Camouflaged [slangily complete this slumberer]
    And what's the purpose?
  16. #16
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by tee hee hee And what's the purpose?

    To detect mold and mildew.
  17. #17
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by -SpectraL To detect mold and mildew.

    Then what? Do they make a big spectacle out of you when they find your penis covered in mold?

    "HEY. WE GOT ONE HERE!! ...LOOKS LIKE THIS ONE IS MOLDY. EVERYONE STAND BACK!"
  18. #18
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by mmQ Then what? Do they make a big spectacle out of you when they find your penis covered in mold?

    "HEY. WE GOT ONE HERE!! …LOOKS LIKE THIS ONE IS MOLDY. EVERYONE STAND BACK!"

    Then you would be sent to the male nurse for delousing.
  19. #19
    mmQ Lisa Turtle
    Originally posted by -SpectraL Then you would be sent to the male nurse for delousing.

    But why do you need to get deloused if you have a moldy penis? Wouldn't you want to get demolded?
  20. #20
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by mmQ But why do you need to get deloused if you have a moldy penis? Wouldn't you want to get demolded?

    Simply because, if you're moldy, you're bound to have cooties as well.
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