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The longest thread on the internet! Free custom LOLcats inside! Ask within!
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2019-12-15 at 8:54 AM UTC
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2019-12-15 at 9:01 AM UTC
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2019-12-15 at 9:11 AM UTCThis is bullshit. OMG just got banned on both accounts for making himself and everyone else 100% custom lolcats. Lanny what the fuck? PLZUNBAN is bringing us quality content. So what if he’s talking to himself.
FREE OMGPLZDNTBAN. -
2019-12-15 at 5:05 PM UTC
Originally posted by Poast This is bullshit. OMG just got banned on both accounts for making himself and everyone else 100% custom lolcats. Lanny what the fuck? PLZUNBAN is bringing us quality content. So what if he’s talking to himself.
FREE OMGPLZDNTBAN.
I don't know that other cat. What kind of games are you playing? -
2019-12-16 at 3:43 PM UTCComing into this thread brand new. Man this is a good thread. I'm just here to be a part of history. Where's my lolcat?The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-12-16 at 5:04 PM UTC
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2019-12-17 at 6:01 PM UTC
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2019-12-18 at 1:52 AM UTC
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2019-12-18 at 2:03 AM UTCHere's a story I just remembered the other day for some reason:
My friend David used to go to primary school with Stephen. One day they're sitting in David's living room watching TV and his mother quietly walks in behind them, trying to cross into the kitchen without being noticed but Stephen says hi and notices she's carrying what looks like a gift box.
Being kids who watched too much TV Stephen starts singing the themesong for 'what's in the box', Dave's mum goes white as a fucking ghost. Dave thinks it's funny so he starts singing it as well, and they press her to show them.
It was a dead cat she'd accidentally run over, and it was in a christmas box because it was the only thing it'd fit in that she found in the back of her car.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-12-18 at 2:16 AM UTC
Originally posted by aldra Here's a story I just remembered the other day for some reason:
My friend David used to go to primary school with Stephen. One day they're sitting in David's living room watching TV and his mother quietly walks in behind them, trying to cross into the kitchen without being noticed but Stephen says hi and notices she's carrying what looks like a gift box.
Being kids who watched too much TV Stephen starts singing the themesong for 'what's in the box', Dave's mum goes white as a fucking ghost. Dave thinks it's funny so he starts singing it as well, and they press her to show them.
It was a dead cat she'd accidentally run over, and it was in a christmas box because it was the only thing it'd fit in that she found in the back of her car.
As promised, a story gets more free 100% custom LOLcats!
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2019-12-18 at 2:27 AM UTCOne time Poasts buddy was leaving town. To Hawaii or some gay place. He wanted to see his buddies one last time and I was Poasts plus one.
This guy was the dude who tried to show Poast how to be cool and I was always a loser trying to fit in. One time we went to record some music at the radio station he was working at. It was terrible and nothing came from it but the vocals were clean. Something I've never been able to do. He was driving me home and he had Linkin Park on. Now's my chance to be deep. Or so I thought. I sperged out, "Dude it doesn't matter if it matters or not even if nothing else matters." I cringe now but at that moment I took the awkward silence as them deep reflecting. I still stand by that statement.
So this guy is leaving for good, and Poast gets wasted and just starts talking shit. Super bad. I'm trying to retard wrangle him in but it led to one of the best quotes I've ever heard;
"The flood gates are up. This is just seepage."
He wasn't wrong. Just out of control. There were a bunch of people looking to have a good time and Poast ruined it. If I remember correctly I just took him somewhere where that type of humor was allowed. -
2019-12-18 at 2:39 AM UTCI'll see if I can find that story from hong kong a few years back, got drugged by hookers and accidentally glassed myself in the faceThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-12-18 at 2:51 AM UTC
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2019-12-18 at 6:29 AM UTCI have MartyMcFlys old posts somewhere
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2019-12-18 at 6:33 AM UTCI have a story. One night I’m heading to bed, minding my own business, when I hear a loud crash on my back porch, followed by a pounding on my sliding glass door. It’s OMG, absolutely trashed and delirious, worse than I’ve probably ever seen him. See, OMG is a drinker, and a fiend, but tonight he’s crazier than usual, and he wakes up my father. We can tell he’s in no shape to hike up the hill and sleep it off, so we try our best to reason with him and coax him inside to sleep on the coach in my bedroom. He’s not having any of that, not, one, bit. As we’re trying to get him to calm down and come inside, he stumbles backwards and falls off my porch into the mud and onto a garden hose. My dad, being an old school party guy turned sober, is visibly furious with all the racket and tries to take the father figure approach with OMG, demanding that he get up, be a man, get inside, and STFU. OMG is too busy fighting the hose he fell on, at this point he’s become completely tangled in the hose, and is yelling and flailing around freaking out. My dad turns his back on OMG in complete disgust, as I’m rummaging around in the dark trying to help him get up. He’s bigger than me and soaking wet so I back off out of fear, and disgust. He’s running on all cylinders and eventually gains footing, running off into the night, either embarrassed or spooked by his encounter with the infamous wild California garden snake. He’s found a block away by someone outside the only liquor store in the area, passed out or overdosing on booze. They take him to the hospital. The hospital his Mother works at. There was no way for him to play that off. He was busted. And my father never looked at him the same. To this day, no matter what OMG does, at the mention of his name my father let’s out a chuckle and says “how is that fucking dumbass doing anyways?” His parents don’t even remember who I am.
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2019-12-18 at 8:13 AM UTCProbably thought the hose was a snake.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-12-18 at 7:42 PM UTC
Originally posted by -SpectraL Probably thought the hose was a snake.
I woke up the next day in my bed shirtless. I was a fat kid and never rocked the shirtless style. My dad asks me, "How was your night son?"
'Oh shit!' I thought. 'How much does he know?' Then I had a realization. 'How much do I know?'
And my family remembers Poast but not WifeDead. Even though WifeDead kinda got kidnapped for three days to help roof my parents house for $5 and all the soda he could drink. But that's another story. -
2019-12-19 at 5:53 AM UTCHomemade History.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-12-19 at 6:04 AM UTC
Originally posted by Poast Homemade History.
The first time I met Poast.
I was walking in a mall with a soda cup. Recognized WifeDead and went over to say hi because I hadn't seen him in a while. I put my drink on some some dumb 50 cent chair that vibrates you or some gay shit. Poast said, "Did you just set that down without planning to ever pick it up again?"
It was truly love at first sight.
I think that same day we went to MomDeads room and Poast found a phonebook and got excited. I was confused as I watched these two degenerates rip it in half as I followed them to a cliff over highway 101 and throw it into oncoming traffic while I ran like a bitch.
So my destitute journey began. -
2019-12-19 at 6:29 AM UTCMiles down the road on this destitute journey, OMG and I are mobbing up the hill in his shitty beat up Camaro. It was his first car and he didn’t give a shit about it. We used to browse free piles just to find large objects to hit at full speed. The best we ever found was an old grandfather clock. But that’s another story. So we’re heading up the hill to his place, when we realize his redneck brother, and a truck full of his friends, are going slow in front of us. They’re all cooler than us because they have a bigger gang, we’re reject stoners at this stage. In the back window of their pickup, they’re all jeering at us and flipping us the bird, daring us to tempt fate. OMG is older than me, but I out rank him in experience so he does whatever I say to an extent. I tell him, “ram them.” He looks over at me hesitantly, and asked if I meant what I said. I nod, this is our moment to show these rednecks we’re crazier than they are. OMG puts on his game face, buckles down, and speeds up significantly, smashing into the rear end of whoever’s truck was driving OMG’s brother up the hill. Their truck lightly fishtails, but they regain control. The whole demeanor in the truck has changed, they went from jeering and on top of the world, to absolutely ass blasted. These are rednecks we’re talking about, their trucks are their life blood. At this point all of them are hanging out the window screaming that they’re gonna kick our asses. We didn’t give a fuck. They were pussies, because they never kicked our asses. And what we did in that moment goes down as legend between OMG and I.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
