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anxiety
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2019-06-18 at 12:09 PM UTCi stopped being high 24/7 and now i feel real anxiety. i had more anxiety when i was strung out but it was always extremely short sighted an in the moment anxiety. now i feel the weight of the universe, life, death, work, the need to find companionship all lurking around molding my personality. it's all more and more in my control every day. weed has stopped being entertaining and memes are downright retarded. it's painful as fuck and every goddamn day it's like my mind is processing another chunk of fucked up shit from the past. i'm weird right now but i can feel my new self emerging slowly. going backwards isn't really something i can do now, i'd rather just kill myself if that's the route i'm going down because there's no point in having to do 4 different drugs around the clock to deal with life and then just having it all crash down around you and being miserable.
this summer is going to suck (again), but in 2-3 months i'm going to be an entirely new person. i'm interested to see what the future holds.
alright, i'm done blogging. go ahead and berate me, shit talkers -
2019-06-18 at 1:08 PM UTC
Originally posted by OG_GREENPLASTIC_JOHNSON_III i stopped being high 24/7 and now i feel real anxiety. i had more anxiety when i was strung out but it was always extremely short sighted an in the moment anxiety. now i feel the weight of the universe, life, death, work, the need to find companionship all lurking around molding my personality. it's all more and more in my control every day. weed has stopped being entertaining and memes are downright retarded. it's painful as fuck and every goddamn day it's like my mind is processing another chunk of fucked up shit from the past. i'm weird right now but i can feel my new self emerging slowly. going backwards isn't really something i can do now, i'd rather just kill myself if that's the route i'm going down because there's no point in having to do 4 different drugs around the clock to deal with life and then just having it all crash down around you and being miserable.
this summer is going to suck (again), but in 2-3 months i'm going to be an entirely new person. i'm interested to see what the future holds.
alright, i'm done blogging. go ahead and berate me, shit talkers -
2019-06-18 at 1:10 PM UTCgive up and get high again what does it matter anyway you earned it, look how good you've been. it'll just be for the morning then you won't touch it for 3 days cmon have a treatThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2019-06-18 at 1:12 PM UTCYou need a year off and let your mind readjust. Don't take any anti depressants either. That shit just leaves you a drooling spastic with even more depression.
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2019-06-18 at 1:47 PM UTC
Originally posted by GGG give up and get high again what does it matter anyway you earned it, look how good you've been. it'll just be for the morning then you won't touch it for 3 days cmon have a treat
Don't listen to him! Stay the course. You're doing so good, GP. You've got this. Just a few more months! Drugs aren't worth destroying your life over, and the anxiety will fade with time.
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-06-18 at 5:51 PM UTCTry good CBD oil. It will work.
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2019-06-18 at 7:27 PM UTC
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2019-06-18 at 7:31 PM UTC
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2019-06-18 at 7:38 PM UTCBut yeah OP kinda in the same boat as you. My summer was bad in a lot of ways last year and its questionable this summer. I get bad anxiety too with the existential fear and what not. I usually get it early in the morning. I get thoughts about going to hell and just other things I don't even want to bring up, like intrusive thoughts. I quit doing tek awhile back some I'm hoping it will help. Though I think a lot of my anxiety is also rooted in my alcoholism. I still drink but the last couple of weeks I've severely cut back. It's just one of those things that will probably get worse before it gets better.
You should keep blogging but just do it less for awhile. I reinstalled sc2 on my other lappy to take my mind off things at night. And when I go to bed I try to meditate, a couple times I've done it though it made the anxiety worse but its believed by some that thats just the mind purging the fear/anxiety.
but yeah a couple days ago I went to visit a friend and we smoked and chilled for a lil bit and he hooked me up with some vics (dont take them all the time like I used too, but felt good because my arm is still a little jacked) I got home and got on my lappy and was just browsing nis and I was like man I feel pretty relaxed maybe I should do something else. And busted out my guitar and made a rough draft for a song and It felt good to do that again as I haven't in awhile.
You should go to the library or go swimming or something. Last summer I only went swimming a couple times which is pretty sorry.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-06-18 at 7:41 PM UTC
Originally posted by Lanny Yes, obviously the solution to recovering from drug addiction is obviously more drugs
I know you just don't like spectral but CBD oil isn't psychoactive like other drugs are its pretty benign. People take gabapentin to get off drugs as its not an insidious drug and its not overpowering and debilitating like anti-psychotics and anti-depressants.
I dunno I just kinda thought cbd oil was mainly meant for inflammation in the body, it definitely doesn't help me sleep.
But you're making it seem like spectral is saying something like "ooh don't do heroin? switch to sitting in your bath tub for a month doing coke instead" -
2019-06-18 at 8:32 PM UTCCBD is an expensive (God is it expensive) meme drug that does nothing for most things except certain kinds of pain and epilepsy.
It helped my pain when I took 300mg of it, but I can't afford to spend that much money on something do mild. Took half a gram basically and it didn't even make me so much as tired, the anxiety sleepy help stuff is bogus. -
2019-06-18 at 8:36 PM UTC
Originally posted by DietPiano CBD is an expensive (God is it expensive) meme drug that does nothing for most things except certain kinds of pain and epilepsy.
It helped my pain when I took 300mg of it, but I can't afford to spend that much money on something do mild. Took half a gram basically and it didn't even make me so much as tired, the anxiety sleepy help stuff is bogus.
Yeah I think so too. My friend gave me his CBD oil and just smokes weed instead. At work several months back on my first day this girl was showing me around and shit and I was severely shaking while trying to do some menial task and she was like "are you nervous?" and I said no I just feel like shit because I quit drinking the last few days and she got this shocked look on her face.. lol She said I need CBD oil but I've just never felt it do anything or have anything change.
doesn't seem that expensive though if it actually helped. I have this bottle of "green roads"
it just reminds me of the holistic stuff that doesn't do anything. I have asthma that comes and goes depending on allergies and when they did away with primatene mist inhalers due to obamas green deal (as if everyone with asthma is going to all point their inhalers up the sky and start obsessively squeezing it into the air at the same time lol) and I got the holistic stuff in a dropper bottle that didn't do anything.. -
2019-06-18 at 8:37 PM UTCI feel you
do you have a job?? -
2019-06-18 at 10:26 PM UTC
Originally posted by Bill Krozby Yeah I think so too. My friend gave me his CBD oil and just smokes weed instead. At work several months back on my first day this girl was showing me around and shit and I was severely shaking while trying to do some menial task and she was like "are you nervous?" and I said no I just feel like shit because I quit drinking the last few days and she got this shocked look on her face.. lol She said I need CBD oil but I've just never felt it do anything or have anything change.
doesn't seem that expensive though if it actually helped. I have this bottle of "green roads"
it just reminds me of the holistic stuff that doesn't do anything. I have asthma that comes and goes depending on allergies and when they did away with primatene mist inhalers due to obamas green deal (as if everyone with asthma is going to all point their inhalers up the sky and start obsessively squeezing it into the air at the same time lol) and I got the holistic stuff in a dropper bottle that didn't do anything..
There's different grades of CBD oils. You have to get some which has been processed correctly. It's like some people drink a bit of olive oil for their stomach, but if you don't get the cold-rolled olive oil, it's shit and won't do any good. You have to buy the premium CBD oil. -
2019-06-18 at 10:30 PM UTC
Originally posted by Lanny Yes, obviously the solution to recovering from drug addiction is obviously more drugs
That's exactly how doctors wean you off hard drugs and booze, kid. They give you another drug to counteract the problem drug. For example, they will give an alcoholic like you Valium, on a descending schedule, until you are weaned off the alcohol, otherwise you would probably die. -
2019-06-18 at 11:23 PM UTC
Originally posted by -SpectraL There's different grades of CBD oils. You have to get some which has been processed correctly. It's like some people drink a bit of olive oil for their stomach, but if you don't get the cold-rolled olive oil, it's shit and won't do any good. You have to buy the premium CBD oil.
whats a good brand? I've tried several different ones. Right now I have this kind
a lot people talk about it and how great it is.. but just can't see a difference -
2019-06-18 at 11:34 PM UTCBest CBD Oils for Sleep, Anxiety, Pain, and Insomnia – Tuck's Top 7 Brands
NuLeaf Naturals – Editor's Pick.
PlusCBD Oil – Highest Quality.
CBDistillery – Best Value.
Spruce – Highest Potency.
Green Roads – Widest Product Selection.
cbdMD – Best Non-THC CBD Oil.
Fab CBD – Best Customer Experience.
https://www.tuck.com/best-cbd-oils/ -
2019-06-18 at 11:40 PM UTCoh i'm using green roads right now... doesn't do anything lol
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2019-06-18 at 11:45 PM UTC
Originally posted by Bill Krozby oh i'm using green roads right now… doesn't do anything lol
https://pluscbdoil.com/cbd-products/cbd-oil-capsules/pluscbd-oil-capsules/
If that doesn't work..
Spruce – Highest Potency.
https://takespruce.com/ -
2019-06-18 at 11:47 PM UTC
Originally posted by -SpectraL https://pluscbdoil.com/cbd-products/cbd-oil-capsules/pluscbd-oil-capsules/
cool i'll look into it. maybe I need something stronger / different. I know people that swear by it and some that don't bother with it after trying it.
