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How do you get by if you run out of toilet paper and don't have any money to get more?

  1. #21
    Originally posted by Speedy Parker That's why your feet stink

    Well you discard the socks after wiping your ass on them, clearly your mistake is putting them back on.
  2. #22
    Soyboy VII: Mattchews Camping Trip Houston [baulk my topological rheum]
    Originally posted by Speedy Parker Use your left hand like a muslim

    Did this once, but my hand smelt badly of shit until I had a long got bath.
  3. #23
    Dregs African Astronaut [that freakishly double-edged allmouth]
    newspaper. old clothes you don't wear anymore. fuck it hard. hell use your hands in the shower...soap it up fresh and clean. ain't nothing hard about this. use your imagination.
  4. #24
    Speedy Parker Black Hole
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson Well you discard the socks after wiping your ass on them, clearly your mistake is putting them back on.

    I use toilet paper because I have money. The only time in my life I had to use anything but TP was in a poor persons house one time in the 80s. Sorry your parents were losers.
  5. #25
    Originally posted by Speedy Parker I use toilet paper because I have money. The only time in my life I had to use anything but TP was in a poor persons house one time in the 80s. Sorry your parents were losers.

    Not sure how having money or good parents helps you when you're in some seedy bar drunk, just took a shit and notice there is not paper...I guess you take mommy and daddy everywhere with you?...I just use me socks.
  6. #26
    HTS highlight reel
    Yoink it from a public bathroom? I dunno, I'm spoiled and never really run into this situation.
  7. #27
    Speedy Parker Black Hole
    Originally posted by HTS Yoink it from a public bathroom? I dunno, I'm spoiled and never really run into this situation.

    How do you wipe the shit from you fag boyfriends dick?
  8. #28
    HTS highlight reel
    Originally posted by Speedy Parker How do you wipe the shit from you fag boyfriends dick?

    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  9. #29
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson Back in my day if you were out of shit roll we used our socks.

    i had a pal when i was a kid that would always do that. we'd always come back from playing over the woods or summing and he'd only have one sock on.


    .
  10. #30
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    Originally posted by MORALLY SUPERIOR BEING VII: Mattchews Camping Trip Did this once, but my hand smelt badly of shit until I had a long got bath.

    i guess its prolly like garlic and onion. you have to wash with cold water otherwise you cook the flavor in.


    .
  11. #31
    Originally posted by NARCassist i had a pal when i was a kid that would always do that. we'd always come back from playing over the woods or summing and he'd only have one sock on.


    .

    Billy, is that you?
  12. #32
    take a shower after or steal from work/businesses
  13. #33
    It's nice when you have one of those clean poops that leaves not a trace.
  14. #34
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    A person came to my home once that I really didn't want around, so I removed the toilet paper and the towels and anything else they could use. Then when they asked to use the toilet, I said sure. Ten minutes later they came out with a huge scowl and started bitching about there being no way to wipe their arse in there, and I was just laughing inside. Then they trounced out in a huge huff, and I went and checked the bathroom and it smelled like shit, but they must have just zipped up and left as they were, because there was nothing for them to use in there.
  15. #35
    Originally posted by -SpectraL A person came to my home once that I really didn't want around, so I removed the toilet paper and the towels and anything else they could use. Then when they asked to use the toilet, I said sure. Ten minutes later they came out with a huge scowl and started bitching about there being no way to wipe their arse in there, and I was just laughing inside. Then they trounced out in a huge huff, and I went and checked the bathroom and it smelled like shit, but they must have just zipped up and left as they were, because there was nothing for them to use in there.

    The solution seems simple, go into the next room and find something to use there.
  16. #36
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson The solution seems simple, go into the next room and find something to use there.

    Couldn't. Locks on the door handles on all bedroom doors engaged.
  17. #37
    Originally posted by -SpectraL Couldn't. Locks on the door handles on all bedroom doors engaged.

    You don't have carpets? Ass drag like a dawg.
  18. #38
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson You don't have carpets? Ass drag like a dawg.

    Yes, but I didn't see any streaks.
  19. #39
    Of course if i was in that situation I'd have just shouted "Hey I need some paper unless you want hand prints on your walls"
  20. #40
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson Of course if i was in that situation I'd have just shouted "Hey I need some paper unless you want hand prints on your walls"

    They never said boo while they were in there.
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