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Where is the line between being a junkie and not?
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2019-03-19 at 4:43 PM UTC
Originally posted by Dissociator I mean, I'd have no problem never drinking. I don't drink anyway. If you said I could never do drugs (besides weed, minor benzos, and buprenorphine) I'd be ok with it. No drugs at all, would honestly freak me the fuck out.
I would start evaluating why it freaks you out so bad. I'm not trying to put myself on a pedestal- just to use it as an example... But like when I asked myself that question 10 or even 5 years ago, it'd cause me actual anxiety. Now, even though I'm on methadone, I look forward to not being on anything. If your brain still had that visceral animal reaction to the THOUGHT of complete sobriety, it probably means you have a hell of a lot moreover work to do.
That's not to say what you haven't done isn't big. But it's important to keep all those flaws in your peripheral view. You can't get out of a cage that if you don't know where the boundaries are, and where the door is. You can't do work to get better if you don't think that particular work needs doing. It's important to acknowledge that we can't Intellectualize our way around neurochemistry and addiction. Your brain will lie to you. You will think you know better. You will think you're in control. You WILL be wrong.
I've had friends come out of a 6 month rehab stint, only to start calling on the phone. Then they say they're not going to get high with us, but if it's cool with me, they want to come by the hotel and hang out while we fix. Then a few days later, they're weighing out the dope on the scale while we watch TV. The next night she says "just blow the smoke in my face i just want to smell it", and they laugh at how ridiculous it is.
A month and a half later, shooting heroin again, with an abscess on her upper arm the size of almost a tennis ball. I should've taken a picture for you it was so disgusting. Gigantic gross pimple with a whitehead. You could see the lump on her arm through a sweatshirt. It was so swollen and red and infected that we couldn't get it clean without her bawling and begging my friend to stop, so she had to go to the ER, and ended up doing a year in rehab after that.
Shit is sneaky, yo. -
2019-03-19 at 5:32 PM UTCWhen are you getting off methadone, Casper? Have you ever tried using Crouton to keep clean? I think it's a lot more manageable than methadone.
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2019-03-19 at 6:22 PM UTCIn my first act as mod, I ban you for 120 days- during which time you will be allowed to view and post in only one thread- which is nothing but that picture. You will be the only poster and only respondee in this thread.
Your ban will be in effect until 12pm pacific time on.....whatever day is 120 days from now. I'm not going to bother autistic googling for the sake of preciseness. -
2019-03-19 at 6:33 PM UTCEven to you, this can't be funny anymore. At some point this became routine and now you've made being annoying a habit. Good job. Great use of your life.
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2019-03-19 at 6:36 PM UTCAll it does is make this thread more fun to view at work
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2019-03-19 at 6:38 PM UTCAnd methadone...I'm down to 120. Excellerating my taper to 3mg/week, so right about the end of this year (or sooner if I start tapering more), I'll be good.
Nigella Sativa oil is supposed to be great for tapering opioids, but the stuff makes my stomach gurgle and get awful cramps. -
2019-03-19 at 6:43 PM UTC
Originally posted by CASPER And methadone…I'm down to 120. Excellerating my taper to 3mg/week, so right about the end of this year (or sooner if I start tapering more), I'll be good.
Nigella Sativa oil is supposed to be great for tapering opioids, but the stuff makes my stomach gurgle and get awful cramps.
I'd never heard of nigella sativa, and was pleasantly surprised to find out it was black seed oil lol. I've been thinking of trying it for a while now, but it's just been bumped way up my list for the sheer fact that I can tell people it's nigella sativa oil.
I don't know if you've ever tried agmatine, but that shit is magical to me. I cut my doses down by 1/2 to 1/3 when I use it. It can also mitigate most wd symptoms for me.
I'm proud of you tho Casper. Keep at it. You'll be totally clean before you know it.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2019-03-19 at 7:20 PM UTCHonestly, if I couldn't do drugs ever again, it depends on what you mean. If I couldn't have gabapentin anymore, I would flip shit because my head fucking hurts even with it. Don't sleep without seroquel. Crouton is also used a a painkiller.
Everything else? I would be fine without. Even Crouton if I absolutely had to I guess. However, that doesn't mean that I won't ever again, but it makes me comfortable knowing that I can trip nuts whenever I want to. The thought of never being able to obtain them ever again worries me more. -
2019-03-19 at 8:59 PM UTC
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2019-03-19 at 9:01 PM UTCFuckin Lanny
I'm now the admin of the site. He can't be trusted. He's infringing upon the rights of the people. He wants to control what language you can and cannot use. -
2019-03-19 at 9:27 PM UTC
Originally posted by DietPiano Honestly, if I couldn't do drugs ever again, it depends on what you mean. If I couldn't have gabapentin anymore, I would flip shit because my head fucking hurts even with it. Don't sleep without seroquel. Crouton is also used a a painkiller.
Everything else? I would be fine without. Even Crouton if I absolutely had to I guess. However, that doesn't mean that I won't ever again, but it makes me comfortable knowing that I can trip nuts whenever I want to. The thought of never being able to obtain them ever again worries me more.
I know what you mean.
I have zero intention of taking LSD ever in my life, but I still like to keep a strip of it for some reason. I love knowing that I can use it at any time. I have what I call my 'essentials' that I try to keep in stock, even if I don't use them all the time. They are: Weed, nicotine, alcohol, KSM-66, caffeine, phenibut, Crouton, noopept, some kind of psychedelic.
I mean I even have bundy and I hate that drug with a passion. Went through one bottle and the rest are just chilling. Most days lately I take Crouton 0-2 times, and weed at night before bed. That's it. I'll eventually cycle back on to a more drug-involving habit though. Maybe I switch to a beer at night instead of weed, and nicotine instead of Crouton. Something like that. Always a combination of the same things and that's the way I like it. Knowing I have the ability to alter my consciousness at any time gives me power.
It's probably not super healthy to think like this, but I've been doing it for the last two years and they've been the most productive of my entire life, so it seems to work. -
2019-03-19 at 9:32 PM UTCWhat do you guys have against croutons?
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2019-03-19 at 9:38 PM UTC
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2019-03-20 at 12:20 AM UTCthey're talking about krаtom. It wordfiltеrs to "crouton"
Where did that one even come from? It doesn't make any sense. -
2019-03-20 at 12:28 AM UTCKartom is overrated
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2019-03-20 at 12:36 AM UTC
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2019-03-20 at 12:39 AM UTC
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2019-03-20 at 1:33 AM UTC
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2019-03-20 at 1:34 AM UTCCrouton
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2019-03-20 at 3:02 AM UTCThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
