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Energy Healing

  1. #1
    I had a (free) appointment with a certified(tm) "Energy Healer" yesterday for my head pain, and she did a "no touch" energy rebalance.

    She moved her hands around my head and felt the energy around me. She says "Ouuohh, yeah, the energy from your head is really not normal (lol, that's true)." Then she starts paddling the air to break up the current energy cycles in my head to reset them.

    She tries to plant seeds in my head by saying certain things like, "This side doesn't feel as bad to me, and it feels like (describes pain)". If I had more cognitive dissonance, I might have believed her, but I basically played along to be nice.

    Basically, she explains that we all have a spidey sense of sorts that goes out about seven feet, which is why we can feel other people walking by us, and that's why paddling the air messes with your brain.

    Sure, I can sense the movements you're making, but I don't think that really constitutes as something that can be exploited for therapeutic means, unless you respond well to SSRI's for depression and think wearing yellow shirts will "hack your brain" into making you happy.

    niggles
  2. #2
    Bueno motherfucker
    Try some freeze dried placenta
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  3. #3
    You need all the chakra work and sound baths you can get nigga.

    Said with love.
  4. #4
    Erekshun Naturally Camouflaged
    How much did you pay for this shit?
  5. #5
    We'reAllBrownNosers African Astronaut
    She may have been a quack, but it's real. Anyone can learn how to do it but not everyone is naturally good at it. https://www.cia.gov/library/readingroom/docs/CIA-RDP96-00787R000500090007-3.pdf
  6. #6
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    I have certain superpowers, but they are strange. For example, I can sense alternate timelines. It's kind of like déjà vu, but different. I can sense how things would have went, if it was another potential future. And it's not like I just see it or feel it, I actually run it forward through my mind as if I'm really there and in it, like it's real. And when it happens, I can learn and discover things I would not have known in this timeline. Real things that I would not have known, had I not experienced the alternate timeline. It's not controllable, though, it just comes on me at random moments. People are always confounded how I can know things I shouldn't know.
  7. #7
    GGG victim of incest [my veinlike two-fold aepyornidae]
    Originally posted by Bueno Try some freeze dried placenta

    There's a certain user here who fed their placenta to their dogs
  8. #8
    So why did you go I’d you don’t believe in it?
  9. #9
    We'reAllBrownNosers African Astronaut
    Originally posted by -SpectraL I have certain superpowers, but they are strange. For example, I can sense alternate timelines. It's kind of like déjà vu, but different. I can sense how things would have went, if it was another potential future. And it's not like I just see it or feel it, I actually run it forward through my mind as if I'm really there and in it, like it's real. And when it happens, I can learn and discover things I would not have known in this timeline. Real things that I would not have known, had I not experienced the alternate timeline. It's not controllable, though, it just comes on me at random moments. People are always confounded how I can know things I shouldn't know.

    https://books.google.com/books?id=GWUMBgAAQBAJ&pg=PP4&lpg=PP4&dq=richard+lighthouse+roswell&source=bl&ots=hnsKXwv0GO&sig=ACfU3U0rInSS3uBq1OflQIj9sGAH6b2iPQ&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwi4v6KC9-bgAhVEhq0KHWRvCUI4ChDoATAJegQIBhAB#v=onepage&q=richard%20lighthouse%20roswell&f=false

    I've been thinking this for a while, points in time or space are a matter of frequencies. Everything involves oscillations.

    I suspect that when a person does anything along the lines of precognition or remote viewing/influencing, they are somehow locking onto the quiet period between the on periods of this 'blinking' of the universe.
  10. #10
    Erekshun Naturally Camouflaged
    Next time go while tripping on shrooms lol
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  11. #11
    Lanny Bird of Courage
    Let me puncture you with my needle(penis) and all your bad energy will be replaced with warm god-energy (semen)
  12. #12
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by We'reAllBrownNosers https://books.google.com/books?id=GWUMBgAAQBAJ&pg=PP4&lpg=PP4&dq=richard+lighthouse+roswell&source=bl&ots=hnsKXwv0GO&sig=ACfU3U0rInSS3uBq1OflQIj9sGAH6b2iPQ&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwi4v6KC9-bgAhVEhq0KHWRvCUI4ChDoATAJegQIBhAB#v=onepage&q=richard%20lighthouse%20roswell&f=false

    I've been thinking this for a while, points in time or space are a matter of frequencies. Everything involves oscillations.

    I suspect that when a person does anything along the lines of precognition or remote viewing/influencing, they are somehow locking onto the quiet period between the on periods of this 'blinking' of the universe.

    I'll have one of these episodes, and maybe I'll have a friend who has a friend I don't know at all and have never met, but in the other potential timeline, I meet his friend and know his name. So I tell my friend I know his friend and even name him, but my friend knows I've never met the guy before and wonders how I know.
  13. #13
    Jojoman Yung Blood [your enmeshed undreamt caprifig]
    just go to the next rainbow gathering, those fuckers will heal u w/ crystals n shit in return for like a bundle of sage or a gram of literally anything

    feel better DP!
  14. #14
    GGG victim of incest [my veinlike two-fold aepyornidae]
    Cool stuff under the hood for sure
  15. #15
    CandyRein Black Hole
    Something a gay Mexican would say?
  16. #16
    Sophie Pedophile Tech Support
    Do you even Reiki bro? Do you even Qi Gong?
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