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Help Fund My Patreon Account to so I Can Pay Taylor Swift to Have Sex with Me
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2018-12-17 at 5:11 AM UTCI have no idea what patreon is or how to set up an account.
But I'm going to one of these days.
Will you all contribute?
I'll bet if I offered her $1,000,000 she'd be down.
ACTUALLY WAIT, better idea just popped into my head...
I will pay a private investigation firm to track down a woman that looks as close to Taylor Swift as they can find, but a non-famous version, and then they will make her an offer of like, $10,000.
A milli to Ms. Swift is like pennies clinking in a piggy bank. -
2018-12-17 at 6:03 AM UTCThat's it, I'm going to bed (to have sweet dreams of Taylor Switft's body double).
Y'all niggas didn't contribute shit, though.
Don't come crying to me next time you want a group of private investigators to track down and negotiate sexual services with a woman (or man) that looks much like the celebrity you want most badly to fuck. -
2018-12-17 at 6:03 AM UTCWhat if we increase the amount and make it a group sex endeavor?
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2018-12-17 at 6:07 AM UTC
Originally posted by GGG What if we increase the amount and make it a group sex endeavor?
Like we all pitch in on a gang bang?
Hmm... Depends on three main factors:
1. Number of dudes involved in said bukkake session.
2. How much this Taylor Swift look-alike actually resembles the real deal.
3. How much we each paying.
After processing those conditional factors, we MIGHT have a workable deal.
I'm not sharing a perfect Taylor clone with 100 dudes though.
Nor am I paying $1,000 to share a mediocre clone with 100 other dudes.
There is some nuanced math involved here.
But first we need the Patreon account. -
2018-12-17 at 6:09 AM UTCWhat would I get for 100?
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2018-12-17 at 6:14 AM UTCI thought Patreon was for recurring things like YouTube people.
You need a GoFundMeThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-12-17 at 6:15 AM UTC
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2018-12-17 at 6:17 AM UTC
Originally posted by Ghost I thought Patreon was for recurring things like YouTube people.
You need a GoFundMe
Maybe GoFundMe is what I was thinking of...
What do people usually set up when they want to gather donations to fuck a hot celebrity, or some kind of similar-looking surrogate?
This is my first crack at this, so I don't know the whole procedure involved. -
2018-12-17 at 6:18 AM UTCNot even enough for a stink finger? I’d never wash it. Just smelling it for years
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2018-12-17 at 6:21 AM UTCYeah I would do a thing with an amount you try to reach like $30k but it might cost more than that to get a date with her.
I'm sure if you had enough money you could buy your way into her social circle, grease some palms and get her phone number at the very least but this seems like an expensive operation. -
2018-12-17 at 6:28 AM UTC
Originally posted by Ughhu Not even enough for a stink finger? I’d never wash it. Just smelling it for years
Because you are someone I now know from NIS, and we both happened to live in some of the same cities, you get automatic stink finger.
Heck, I might even let you get front-line action.
Us Canadian NISians need to stick together. -
2018-12-17 at 6:29 AM UTC
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2018-12-17 at 6:33 AM UTC
Originally posted by gadzooks I have no idea what patreon is or how to set up an account.
But I'm going to one of these days.
Will you all contribute?
I'll bet if I offered her $1,000,000 she'd be down.
ACTUALLY WAIT, better idea just popped into my head…
I will pay a private investigation firm to track down a woman that looks as close to Taylor Swift as they can find, but a non-famous version, and then they will make her an offer of like, $10,000.
A milli to Ms. Swift is like pennies clinking in a piggy bank.
taylor swift is so fucking gross dude, how can anyone want to fuck her? she has the worst posture ever, she's a stick board with ten tons of makeup. she's 6/10 at best, I see cuter girls than her all the time. not even a contest. fuck dude, get better taste. -
2018-12-17 at 6:35 AM UTC
Originally posted by Rizzo in a box taylor swift is so fucking gross dude, how can anyone want to fuck her? she has the worst posture ever, she's a stick board with ten tons of makeup. she's 6/10 at best, I see cuter girls than her all the time. not even a contest. fuck dude, get better taste.
Fame is hot, tho.
Also, those other chicks can't afford the kind of makeup that make you look like Taylor Swift.
Remember, I'm talking about ONE NIGHT.
She doesn't have to look good without makeup on.
She can wear all the makeup she needs. -
2018-12-17 at 6:37 AM UTC
Originally posted by gadzooks Fame is hot, tho.
Also, those other chicks can't afford the kind of makeup that make you look like Taylor Swift.
Remember, I'm talking about ONE NIGHT.
She doesn't have to look good without makeup on.
She can wear all the makeup she needs.
fuck that noise, take all her shit and fuck all her friends. im sure she has friends that are WAAAAAAY hotter and much less famous. fame is only attractive if you're a fag. that shit doesn't impress me. you're still a dumb whore, I don't care how many fat dudes jack off to you on TV.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2018-12-17 at 6:38 AM UTCI feel like she would be weirded out when I bring out the turkey baster and tell her to squirt the water on my faceThe following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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2018-12-17 at 6:39 AM UTC
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2018-12-17 at 1:07 PM UTC
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2018-12-17 at 4:01 PM UTCBend over, Boo.
I've got a nice new crisp 10 dollar bill with your name on it. -
2018-12-17 at 5:24 PM UTC
