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Niggas in Space > Half Baked > What's the best way to weigh your penis?
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What's the best way to weigh your penis?

  1. 2018-11-27 at 11:05 PM UTC
    #61
    vindicktive vinny Black Hole
    Originally posted by RisiR † You'd be wrong. Don't you know Archimedes and the king's crown? That's where the entire thing comes from. Density is the deciding factor. Not shape.

    imforgot the correlation between density, volume amd mass.
  2. 2018-11-27 at 11:22 PM UTC
    #62
    DontTellEm Black Hole
    Don't have one & worry about a number. ☺️
  3. 2018-11-27 at 11:40 PM UTC
    #63
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by -SpectraL Volume displacement?

    Archimedes is among us.
  4. 2018-11-27 at 11:46 PM UTC
    #64
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by Odigo Messenger - Now With Free 911 Service Why tho?

    Penis weight is now a protected class.

    There are those out there that suffer from poor penile endowment can no longer be made fun of without risking a discrimination law suit.

    Also, if you choose not to sleep with a man because of the size of his member, you have committed an act of discrimination tantamount to a hate crime.
  5. 2018-11-27 at 11:48 PM UTC
    #65
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Men with one-inch dicks have rights, too. ^
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  6. 2018-11-27 at 11:49 PM UTC
    #66
    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    Originally posted by vindicktive vinny molding and casting ?

    hello 2018.

    we have 3d scanners and printers now.

    the deutschlandicks are living behind the times.

    In the old days, people would just use the photocopier at the office.
  7. 2018-11-27 at 11:56 PM UTC
    #67
    Obbe Alan What? [annoy my right-angled speediness]
    Originally posted by RisiR † No, the density of water is always the same (at the same temperature). You need to know the density of the stuff you throw in the water.

    Oh. Since your penis is like 75% water anyway, wouldn't you be 75% correct if you did use the density of water?
  8. 2018-11-28 at 12:04 AM UTC
    #68
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Wait, couldn't you just pull out your junk and lay it out on a small food scale?

    I literally just tried that (and yes, it looked ridiculous, obviously).

    The scale was fluctuating way too much though.

    So I tried my hand.

    Same thing, too much fluctuation.

    But, maybe if you anesthetize your bodily appendage that you want to weigh, it might reduce those fluctuations.

    If it's anesthetized, it's literally dead weight.
  9. 2018-11-28 at 12:34 AM UTC
    #69
    RisiR † 29 Autism
    I have a pharmacy grade microgram scale but as long as the penis is attached to the body I'm not sure if that affects it to the point of the meassurment being flawed.

    How much does your dick weigh?
  10. 2018-11-28 at 12:43 AM UTC
    #70
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by RisiR † I have a pharmacy grade microgram scale but as long as the penis is attached to the body I'm not sure if that affects it to the point of the meassurment being flawed.

    How much does your dick weigh?

    Well, since I'm a grower, not a shower, and erectile status counts (bloodflow == higher mass), I'm not too ready to divulge whatever measurement I was able to obtain (since I was flaccid as fuck).

    Also, like I said, it was fluctuating like crazy.
  11. 2018-11-28 at 12:43 AM UTC
    #71
    Grimace motherfucker [my enumerable hindi guideword]
    Let's all 3D print our dicks and assholes and sell them to each other.

    Or collect them like some really fucked up trading card game except it's not cards at all, it's 3D printed genitals.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  12. 2018-11-28 at 12:45 AM UTC
    #72
    RisiR † 29 Autism
    Originally posted by gadzooks Well, since I'm a grower, not a shower, and erectile status counts (bloodflow == higher mass), I'm not too ready to divulge whatever measurement I was able to obtain (since I was flaccid as fuck).

    Also, like I said, it was fluctuating like crazy.

    Fluctuating between what numbers?
  13. 2018-11-28 at 12:45 AM UTC
    #73
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by Grimace Let's all 3D print our dicks and assholes and sell them to each other.

    We can pair off into two-member teams based on anal and dick size match.

    But not for gay sex...

    Just because it would be interesting.
  14. 2018-11-28 at 12:46 AM UTC
    #74
    RisiR † 29 Autism
    Originally posted by Grimace Let's all 3D print our dicks and assholes and sell them to each other.

    Or collect them like some really fucked up trading card game except it's not cards at all, it's 3D printed genitals.

    Mine will be an ultra rare shiny.
  15. 2018-11-28 at 12:46 AM UTC
    #75
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by RisiR † Fluctuating between what numbers?

    It was like "100 grams" +- 500 grams.

    The fluctuations were way too chaotic to make any sense of the numbers.
  16. 2018-11-28 at 12:49 AM UTC
    #76
    RisiR † 29 Autism
    100g is solid isn't it? How much does the average penis weigh?
  17. 2018-11-28 at 12:54 AM UTC
    #77
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by RisiR † 100g is solid isn't it? How much does the average penis weigh?

    You may be the Magellan of member measurement, because not many seem to be interested in knowing how much their genitalia weigh.

    Well, people to "flex nuts" a lot, but that's more metaphorical than anything.

    Generally, some function of length * girth is usually the measure of a man's masculinity.
  18. 2018-11-28 at 1:16 AM UTC
    #78
    RisiR † 29 Autism
    To calculate the penis weight we'll have to do some calculations first. The volume figures, in cubic inches, shown in the size data chart can easily be converted to weight by the application of appropriate conversion factors. For example, a dick having a volume of 20 cubic inches would be found to weigh 12.25 ounces, or about 0.77 pounds; some dicks are going to weigh in at more than a pound!

    The following assumptions and relationships have been used for these calculations.

    (1) First, although obvious, it should be recognized that two different units of measure are involved; i.e., we are starting with volume in cubic inches but we want weight, which can be expressed either in the metric system as grams, or in the English system as ounces or pounds. The units of measure in the two systems cannot be used together without appropriate conversion factors. Furthermore, to convert volume to weight, something has to be known about the density of the substance in question, or what the weight of a given volume of it is.

    (2) Inasmuch as the penis is composed largely of blood at full erection, it is appropriate that a value for the density (specific gravity) of blood be factored in as the basis for the final results. This is not completely accurate anatomically, but in the absence of data on the density of the penis per se, this is as close an estimate as can be made at this time.

    (3) The following factors have been used to make these calculations:

    ****To calculate weight in grams, multiply cubic inches by 17.37.

    ****To caculate weight in ounces, multiply cubic inches by 0.613.

    ****To caculate weight in pounds, multiply cubic inches by 0.0383.

    (4) The intermediate calculations are:

    (a) To obtain weight in grams, multiply the cubic inch volume values shown in the size chart by 16.39 to convert to volume in cubic centimeters (cc), and then multipy this value by 1.06 (grams whole blood per cc at body temperatere of 37 degrees Celcius) to obtain total number of grams of penis weight.

    (b) To obtain weight in ounces, divide the gram weight by 28.35.

    © To obtain weight in pounds, divide the gram weight by 453.59.

    (5) List of individual conversion relationships used above:

    **** 1 cubic inch = 16.39 cubic centimeters (cc)

    **** 1 cc of blood weighs 1.06 grams at 37 degrees Celcius (average from Google search, not exact)

    **** 1 pound = 453.59 grams

    **** 1 ounce = 1 pound/16 = 453.59/16 = 28.35 grams
  19. 2018-11-28 at 1:56 AM UTC
    #79
    gadzooks Dark Matter [keratinize my mild-tasting blossoming]
    Originally posted by RisiR † …

    Dude this is like some PhD Thesis material shit.

    I could just imagine a young PhD or MD graduating and being known in the academic community for their paper titled:

    "Effective Penis Weight Estimation as Derived using Volume and Known Temperature Data: A Look at a Suitable Alternative to the 'Cut-it-Off-And-Weigh-It' Method Proposed in Earlier Research".
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  20. 2018-11-28 at 3:58 AM UTC
    #80
    Technologist victim of incest
    I think it would be cool to ask a guy how much his junk weighs, as opposed to asking how long.

    I could say, hey I got 3 lbs last night.


    Guys would exert their manhood by citing their weight. Not a bad idea, though; it’s more accurate than knowing length.
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