You wake up to this person standing over your bed staring at you

1. 2018-05-30 at 1:50 AM UTC

   #1
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   What u do?
   
   
2. 2018-05-30 at 1:51 AM UTC

   #2
   

   Rock_N_Rollover African Astronaut [my obsessively old-time raunch]
   Scream.
   The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

   • The Self Taught Man
3. 2018-05-30 at 1:52 AM UTC

   #3
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   Fart
4. 2018-05-30 at 2:09 AM UTC

   #4
   

   Bologna Nacho African Astronaut
   Pull the trigger.
5. 2018-05-30 at 3:55 AM UTC

   #5
   

   BeigeWarlock African Astronaut
   I warn Wife, Kids, Mom and whoever living in my house.. Never do this. I can't help me reactionary impulse to punch you square in the face.
6. 2018-05-30 at 4:02 AM UTC

   #6
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   Rape him
7. 2018-05-30 at 5:35 AM UTC

   #7
   

   BeigeWarlock African Astronaut

   Originally posted by Captain Rape him

   
   with a straight face? I dare you.
8. 2018-05-30 at 7:20 AM UTC

   #8
   

   Daily an(nu)ally [dissolutely whisk the pantheon]
   Drink a coffee in order to suppress my appetite and remain at my caloric maintenance
   The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

   • The Self Taught Man
9. 2018-05-30 at 7:22 AM UTC

   #9
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   you're body is a wire frame i will mold into embarrassing positions
10. 2018-05-30 at 8:01 AM UTC

    #10
    

    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    call animal control
11. 2018-05-30 at 8:09 AM UTC

    #11
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole
    OP you look like a kid who doesn't go outside very much.
12. 2018-05-30 at 10:39 AM UTC

    #12
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by BeigeWarlock with a straight face? I dare you.

    
    I'm usually expecting them to make an "O-face" actually
13. 2018-05-30 at 10:44 AM UTC

    #13
    EllariaSand African Astronaut
    Shoot first
    
    
    Ask questions later
14. 2018-05-30 at 10:55 AM UTC

    #14
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by EllariaSand Shoot first
    
    
    Ask questions later

    
    Inb4 they ruin your shitty Rambo fantasy, and beat andrape you with the help of your own gun.
15. 2018-05-30 at 10:56 AM UTC

    #15
    EllariaSand African Astronaut
    
16. 2018-05-30 at 10:58 AM UTC

    #16
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by EllariaSand

    
    This gif is exactly as small as the penis you're pretending not to have.
17. 2018-05-30 at 10:58 AM UTC

    #17
    tee hee hee Naturally Camouflaged [slangily complete this slumberer]
    Tackle down and cut hair.
18. 2018-05-30 at 11:02 AM UTC

    #18
    EllariaSand African Astronaut

    Originally posted by Captain This gif is exactly as small as the penis you're pretending not to have.

    
    More of the witty repartee I’ve come to expect here 👏👏👏
    
    Well done dear
    
    
    Well done
19. 2018-05-30 at 11:06 AM UTC

    #19
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by EllariaSand More of the witty repartee I’ve come to expect here 👏👏👏
    
    Well done dear
    
    
    Well done

    
    Yeah, sarcastically talking about how much you suck is a better move.
20. 2018-05-30 at 11:17 AM UTC

    #20
    EllariaSand African Astronaut
    Absofuckinlutely
    
    Plenty of other DHers willing to kiss ass here....no need for me too
    
    
    
    
    
    You’re not as stupid as you look after all