You wake up to this person standing over your bed staring at you

1. 2018-05-30 at 1:26 PM UTC

   #21
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole

   Originally posted by EllariaSand Absofuckinlutely
   
   Plenty of other DHers willing to kiss ass here….no need for me too
   
   
   
   
   
   You’re not as stupid as you look after all

   
   I'm talking about your self deprecation, dummy.
2. 2018-05-30 at 1:54 PM UTC

   #22
   

   -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
   This actually happened to me once. I was in my apartment, in my bedroom, sleeping, and I woke up and there were two men in dark suits standing on each side of my bed. I said, "How the fuck did you get in here??" One of them said, "The landlord." Then he showed me a detective's badge. I said, "What the fuck do you want?", as I looked in his hand and saw some seedling pot plants I had just been starting up in an aquarium in the living room. The other one said, "Marijuana is illegal, so we're going to take these.". So, I said fine, take them and GTFO. And they did.
3. 2018-05-30 at 3:43 PM UTC

   #23
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   Did you go back to sleep?