2018-05-01 at 5:47 PM UTC
Zanick
motherfucker
[my p.a. supernal goa]
I rinse down for a minute or two before using a Dove exfoliating bar to lather myself from head to toe. I'm generous with this step: I don't think one can be too clean. Then I work a sulfate-free shampoo into my scalp and wash it out. I don't repeat. Following the shampoo, I use a generous amount of hydrating conditioner and leave it in for three minutes. My hair is naturally kinky because I'm a white negro, and this is the only way to tame my ferocious curls. While the conditioner penetrates the shafts, I take the opportunity to brush my teeth vigorously with an enamel-restoring toothpaste. I need this because I've been drinking coffee since I was four. After I'm done brushing, I wash the conditioner out and drink some coffee. Sometimes I also vomit.
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
2018-05-01 at 5:48 PM UTC
why the fuck would you post about that ffs?
.
2018-05-01 at 5:49 PM UTC
Zanick
motherfucker
[my p.a. supernal goa]
I took a shower and it was a very intense experience that I thought I had to share with you. Not everybody, just you.
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
2018-05-01 at 5:54 PM UTC
Does anybody else squeegee themselves dry(er) before using a towel? I find it helps significantly. I hate using wet towels to try and dry myself.
2018-05-01 at 5:55 PM UTC
i brush most of the water off with my hand. i think applying a squeegee to my body a bit far tho.
.
2018-05-01 at 5:56 PM UTC
Wat about the cocoa butters Zan? You forgot to moisturize.
2018-05-01 at 6:15 PM UTC
Obbe
Alan What?
[annoy my right-angled speediness]
My cat keeps going in the shower with me. I have to leave the door open because he will tear up the carpet outside the bathroom door if I don't.
2018-05-01 at 6:22 PM UTC
tee hee hee
Naturally Camouflaged
[slangily complete this slumberer]
The cat likes to watch naked ppl. A bit of a pervert i'd say.
2018-05-01 at 6:26 PM UTC
Yeah you gotta moisturize or else you’ll get the wrinkles and maybe even excema.
2018-05-01 at 6:28 PM UTC
Zanick
motherfucker
[my p.a. supernal goa]
I don't want either of those, but all I have right now is HCl. I'm going to try that right now and see if it makes my wrinkles and eczema go away. How will I know they're gone if I can't see them yet? Do I just keep rinsing with HCl?
2018-05-01 at 6:30 PM UTC
Originally posted by Zanick
That's adorable! Do you think it's because he likes to be around you, or is he just very nosy?
I think it might be because he's a, ya know, a..
a cat. Anyway I don't shower I bubble bathe thrice a day but i did shower once when I was 15 and I just remember jacking off for like an hour. I don't think I even washed my hair or body it was just wire-to-wire strokage.
I guess if I were to try one in this day and age I'd probably do the same thing but wash my hair and body real quick afterward.
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
2018-05-01 at 6:46 PM UTC
was gonna post a pulp fiction hosepipe gif but the duck couldn't find one. there were some really fucked up results that he did find tho, lol.
now that's my kinda shower routine.
.
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
2018-05-01 at 6:47 PM UTC
Not enough porn clips on this site imo.
2018-05-01 at 7:20 PM UTC
Try not to splash water all over the place, wash the sweat traps like ass, thigh, pits, torso, balls.
Pour some surfactants, soap and fragrance chemicals all over myself.
Rub everything down with goat soap.
Wash it off, gargle some water and clean out all orifices.
