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How to steal cars in 2018

  1. #1
    FuckNasa Yung Blood
    Can somebody give me a step by step guide on how to solder something together that SWIM could steal modern cars with?

    I have parrot OS and it has an automotive section, and I'm assuming Kali does too. It has something called Can utils, canbus triple, caring caribou, kayak, and udsim and idk how to use any of this shit.

    It can be an old school method too, just something that will work on cars you are likely to encounter today.
  2. #2
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    find a car for private sale
    go look at it as a buyer
    test drive it
    first opportunity just drive off



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    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  3. #3
    RestStop Space Nigga
    Most people leave their cars running while walking into the gas station for whatever else. I will leave the rest to your imagination.
  4. #4
    FuckNasa Yung Blood
    You are trying to get a nigga arrested. You need to be able to do it from some kind of long term parking area in another city and that way you have enough time to get away...so a way someone won't be reporting you to the cops in the next 5 minutes.

    Kill them I guess
  5. #5
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    there's no stealing cars without risk, but that's half the fun. in my day we'd steal cars then go look for pigs for a chase.



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  6. #6
    check front doors to houses, then check for car keys when you find an open one.
  7. #7
    Psyclonic Yung Blood
    Lots of people leave them unlocked, how hard is hotwiring? For a friend, of course.
  8. #8
    infinityshock Black Hole
    Originally posted by Psyclonic Lots of people leave them unlocked, how hard is hotwiring? For a friend, of course.

    that went out of style when they invented computer-controlled cars.

    even a direct jumper to the starter solenoid doesnt work anymore.
  9. #9
    OP need more information on types of new cars your looking to GTA. Stealing them for the needs of joyriding, crimes(drop car), or chopping? Advice I can give you if it's for joyriding or crimes(drop car) then go after older model cars that don't have all the newest security features inserted like GPS, ignition shut off switches, ETC... High end newer model cars have all sorts of random security devices. I mean I could help you if there was certain model cars your interested in boosting, but every manufacture of cars has its own security features different then the other companies. Also dealerships sometimes put there own GPS/shut off devices in to find vehicles for people not making there payment.

    A jimmy to open car doors is still the best way to get into any car door and some higher end cars take a method called bumping which is when you send a current through the battery line to short circuit the security device or ignition to start the car.

    Hotwiring still works on certain models, but now with all the new technology out there it can be risky to do or not work at all depending on the ignition set up, but you can always get bump keys with learning the ins and outs of the trade.

    If this is something you really want to get to know all the ins and outs of I would advise you to get a job at a auto shop and dealership part time and self teach yourself the trade and access to the tools needed.
  10. #10
    NARCassist gollums fat coach
    Originally posted by Psyclonic Lots of people leave them unlocked, how hard is hotwiring? For a friend, of course.

    easy as fuck

    ..if it was 1985



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  11. #11
    Why do people want cars so much?

    What are you going to do with the car when you steal it?

    Where will you store it? You need a garage.

    Where will you sell it?

    If you just want to go for a joyride, you are an immature retard.
    Steal motorcycles and dirtbikes instead. Most can still be started with auto jigglers and they can be easily taken apart and stored in your bedroom/storage room/shed. It's easy to swipe parts as well and the re-sale potential is much higher.
  12. #12
    AngryOnion Big Wig [the nightly self-effacing broadsheet]
    The kid who introduced me to TOTSE was killed in a stolen Porsche he and friend stole.
    They didn't even get chased by the cops those two dumb niggers just couldn't drive worth a shit.
    This was in about 1992 and it was an older car. They probably learned how to hot wire cars from "Bad Ideas".
  13. #13
    totse3.com Space Nigga
    Originally posted by AngryOnion The kid who introduced me to TOTSE was killed in a stolen Porsche he and friend stole.
    They didn't even get chased by the cops those two dumb niggers just couldn't drive worth a shit.
    This was in about 1992 and it was an older car. They probably learned how to hot wire cars from "Bad Ideas".

    Who was Greenspam?
  14. #14
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by Jim Why do people want cars so much?

    What are you going to do with the car when you steal it?

    Where will you store it? You need a garage.

    Where will you sell it?

    If you just want to go for a joyride, you are an immature retard.
    Steal motorcycles and dirtbikes instead. Most can still be started with auto jigglers and they can be easily taken apart and stored in your bedroom/storage room/shed. It's easy to swipe parts as well and the re-sale potential is much higher.

    You obviously use the car to do other crime you fucking retard. You can strip and sell them too what kind of a fuckboy are You? Prove you're not a fuckboy or forever be known as a fuckboy, fuckboy.
  15. #15
    totse3.com Space Nigga
    Originally posted by Sudo You obviously use the car to do other crime you fucking retard. You can strip and sell them too what kind of a fuckboy are You? Prove you're not a fuckboy or forever be known as a fuckboy, fuckboy.

    This BBS is ran out of NorCal.. we adopted the asian spelling of FukBoi
  16. #16
    Originally posted by Sudo You obviously use the car to do other crime you fucking retard. You can strip and sell them too what kind of a fuckboy are You? Prove you're not a fuckboy or forever be known as a fuckboy, fuckboy.

    Sub 20 IQ alert. See you on PoliceActivity.
  17. #17
    AngryOnion Big Wig [the nightly self-effacing broadsheet]
    Originally posted by totse3.com Who was Greenspam?

    No clue I cant even keep track of who's who here.
  18. #18
    Esplender Tuskegee Airman [my gynecological profit-maximising katar]
    Search for news articles about car owners keeping their keys in the microwave.
  19. #19
    Grimace motherfucker [my enumerable hindi guideword]
    Here in Atlanta, the niggers popularized the crime of stealing cars while the owner pumps gas.

    Apparently, they lie in wait in the parking lot of the gas station, and selectively pick their victim. They find someone who for whatever retarded fucking reason, seems to have left their keys in the ignition (but engine off) while they go to pump. They creep up on the passenger side while the owner is figuring out how to use the gas pump, hop in, scoot over to the driver seat, crank it up and take off.

    Why in the fuck you'd ever leave your keys in the ignition as you pump is beyond me.
  20. #20
    Sudo Black Hole [my hereto riemannian peach]
    Originally posted by Jim Sub 20 IQ alert. See you on PoliceActivity.

    I'll fucking fuck your fuckboi ass right in front of your fucking mother fuckboi. Show me your biceps right fucking now
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