2018-01-26 at 4:30 AM UTC
mashlehash
victim of incest
[my perspicuously dependant flavourlessness]
I am not the devil, so why the FUCK do I have to use my left hand every night? I'm an architecture for crying out loud, I need my strength. Why do I need to be the one with blue balls? It makes me want to throw a red dodgeball at her face and tell her to stop.
FIRST OF ALL
I can't even get a handjob, let alone a good thrombustion in the dome chamber. I didn't go through acne in highschool for this.
The one person, THE ONE PERSON!...who is supposed to be my ever-loving Angel, can't even love me around the rose garden? Sure, I can shave but would that change the fucking picture?!?
What have vows come to? I should have said, "You will happily suck my dick on football sunday." right in-front of her duckfisk-redneck father during the service.
I am a man with needs, you know?
Why did I marry this old Clarinet? I enjoy a wide variety of musical instruments, and not ONCE has she shown the person interest to tell me that she likes the music. Again, she can't even suck dick.
I should have known after the countless experience when she DENIED to give me oral or a good whacker(I even took her to a football game), that she was not the one. Why the fuck should I mow the lawn if you can't whack my pecker?
I want a dirty whore that knows what unconditional love is before being set in a principle of ownership.
"You're a whore wife, but I love you...And I know you love me because I own the local food bank."
Stupid fucking whore, you can't even get bread anymore. I'm done, I really am. I don't mean to sound like a hasty asshole shopping through a store.
Let me put it this way....
If I need to SLOPE the fucking Dijon Mustard from my shirt with cheap cheddar cheese, on a week day or hell, even a weekend... without my wife knowing....then I'ma wet the old canoe down the macaroni river.
I've even called the hotline and I didn't even get off, because the whole time I complained incessantly about my wife.... I just got pissed off and hung up. I even had to pay Your Laundry or whatever the fuck her name was.
Which, totally floats my love canoe if you know what I'm saying.
She doesn't have to know. The old hag is ruthlessly arrogant. She doesn't even know what Craigslist is. If she did, it would mean that I was divorcing her ass and had to make that bitch make an ad to move the flattened couch that she lopes on.
Let me ask you this question, when's the last time you had astounding sex after thirty-five years of marriage? When is the last time Don, or Margarette I'll tell you what, the river runs dry.
The bitch won't sign the papers, it's like she wants to put me under the corn field out back...she didn't even cry during Secret Window. That fucking ticket costed seven FUCKING dollars and FIFTY fucking cents?
DO YOU KNOW WHAT I DID THAT NIGHT? Listened to 50 Cent and had a 25 cent hand job.
2018-01-26 at 4:35 AM UTC
You masturbated to me. Slut. Victim.
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
2018-01-26 at 5:10 AM UTC
Good post. Even though I really don't like your bitch ass anymore. Even though no one does. This was a good post man.
2018-01-26 at 5:38 AM UTC
mashlehash
victim of incest
[my perspicuously dependant flavourlessness]
Marcos Aurelius how much do you weigh
2018-01-26 at 5:39 AM UTC
185. How little money and prospects do you have?
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
2018-01-26 at 5:45 AM UTC
mashlehash
victim of incest
[my perspicuously dependant flavourlessness]
Nigga all you do is watch springer
2018-01-26 at 5:51 PM UTC
So did you get your dick sucked or?
2018-01-29 at 5:33 PM UTC
mashlehash
victim of incest
[my perspicuously dependant flavourlessness]
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell....Marcos is back on meth.
2018-01-29 at 7:08 PM UTC
keep it litty fam big up 1 love
2018-02-01 at 8:04 PM UTC
How would you do that when you have nothing but your own crazy thoughts?
More importantly, why would you want to? Sploo wannabe now.
