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Empathy Vs Remorse
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2018-01-19 at 9:29 PM UTC
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2018-01-19 at 10:05 PM UTC
Originally posted by Daily I've never understood this
I can understand with perfect clarity what somebody is feeling depending on what they're saying to me. Oh, you just got fired? Damn, bruh, sucks! I'll help you out, I know a guy. Broke up with your gf? Dude, look at these red flags she exhibited, who gives a shit? She was a cunt. Family problems? I don't know what to say to you breh but I'm here for whatever you need.
But…feeling what they're feeling? That's bullshit, no? Do people actually feel, like really FEEL what somebody else is feeling because you're listening to their words and looking at their facial expressions?
Real talk. I'm not some sort of psycho, I'm a very functional person with healthy relationships. But I certainly cannot, under any circumstances, feel what somebody else is feeling. I just understand what they're feeling because I'm not an autist.
Am I the only one here? Enter back me up
I agree. We can only see their emotions, but don't share them unless we are close to them.
I think empathy means you feel the way they feel. -
2018-01-19 at 10:05 PM UTCAn SG thread.
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2018-01-19 at 10:31 PM UTC
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2018-01-20 at 2:06 AM UTC
Originally posted by Daily I've never understood this
I can understand with perfect clarity what somebody is feeling depending on what they're saying to me. Oh, you just got fired? Damn, bruh, sucks! I'll help you out, I know a guy. Broke up with your gf? Dude, look at these red flags she exhibited, who gives a shit? She was a cunt. Family problems? I don't know what to say to you breh but I'm here for whatever you need.
But…feeling what they're feeling? That's bullshit, no? Do people actually feel, like really FEEL what somebody else is feeling because you're listening to their words and looking at their facial expressions?
Real talk. I'm not some sort of psycho, I'm a very functional person with healthy relationships. But I certainly cannot, under any circumstances, feel what somebody else is feeling. I just understand what they're feeling because I'm not an autist.
Am I the only one here? Enter back me up
No, now that you mention it, I don't feel it either. You're right.
And I think it's because the concept/idea of empathy is exaggerated by this feminine, liberal modern day society. People are just pretending to be "empathetic" to "be a good person". -
2018-01-20 at 3:19 AM UTC
Originally posted by Enter No, now that you mention it, I don't feel it either. You're right.
And I think it's because the concept/idea of empathy is exaggerated by this feminine, liberal modern day society. People are just pretending to be "empathetic" to "be a good person".
"I haven't felt it therefore it isn't real, it's just a liberal feminist conspiracy" - I thought you stopped being this solipsistic, Enter. -
2018-01-21 at 2:18 PM UTC
Originally posted by mmQ But to feel remorse you essentially have to demonstrate empathy in that you understand why you feel the remorse in the first place.
Sure, but remorse comes after empathy. Because of empathy(Cognitive or otherwise) you know what you did hurt someone or whatever, then because of that you experience a negative emotion separate from the original emotion. Remorse is internally oriented. -
2018-01-21 at 2:20 PM UTC
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2018-01-21 at 2:31 PM UTC
Originally posted by SBTlauien How do these two relate?
What does it mean if a person can't feel empathy and doesn't feel remorse for things that he/she knows hurt others?
He/she knows that the things were wrong, but doesn't care about the effects it had on others?
Originally posted by mmQ They're practically the same thing.
Ehhh, I disagree. I can feel empathy for matters that I don't give a shit otherwise about. I EMPATHIZE for them.
To be REMORSEFUL suggests you have done SOMETHING that you are ashamed of, wouldn't do normally, embarrassed of, or just out right disgusted with how you acted. The reasons can vary wildly, but to be REMORSEFUL means you acknowledge you did something wrong and you wish you hadn't vs EMPATHY which might acknowledge the fact that its wrong, but feel no emotional attachment to it. -
2018-01-22 at 10:41 AM UTC
Originally posted by Sophie Sure, but remorse comes after empathy. Because of empathy(Cognitive or otherwise) you know what you did hurt someone or whatever, then because of that you experience a negative emotion separate from the original emotion. Remorse is internally oriented.
Originally posted by Grimace Ehhh, I disagree. I can feel empathy for matters that I don't give a shit otherwise about. I EMPATHIZE for them.
To be REMORSEFUL suggests you have done SOMETHING that you are ashamed of, wouldn't do normally, embarrassed of, or just out right disgusted with how you acted. The reasons can vary wildly, but to be REMORSEFUL means you acknowledge you did something wrong and you wish you hadn't vs EMPATHY which might acknowledge the fact that its wrong, but feel no emotional attachment to it.
Fair assessments. I was wrong, they aren't practically the same thing.
Someone beats the shit out of me. I later find that person and beat the shit out of them. Now we can both empathize with how shitty it feels to get your ass kicked, but I wouldn't have far less reason to feel remorse about my retaliating beat down, whereas other guy would have more reason to feel remorseful about kicking my ass in the first place. Not to be confused with regret. Is that an accurate example of what you're saying, Paniel?
I was focusing on remorse as the primary word of the two, as in, I don't think you can feel remorse without an accompanying empathy. Remorse could be defined as empathetic guilt. That's why I said they're the same.
Obviously you can feel empathy without remorse, like most empathetic feelings in general where it's just outsiders that had nothing to do with causing the pain or emotions of those they're empathizing with, but I don't think you can feel remorse without (at least cognitive) empathy. -
2018-01-22 at 11:36 AM UTC
Originally posted by Daily I've never understood this
I can understand with perfect clarity what somebody is feeling depending on what they're saying to me. Oh, you just got fired? Damn, bruh, sucks! I'll help you out, I know a guy. Broke up with your gf? Dude, look at these red flags she exhibited, who gives a shit? She was a cunt. Family problems? I don't know what to say to you breh but I'm here for whatever you need.
But…feeling what they're feeling? That's bullshit, no? Do people actually feel, like really FEEL what somebody else is feeling because you're listening to their words and looking at their facial expressions?
Real talk. I'm not some sort of psycho, I'm a very functional person with healthy relationships. But I certainly cannot, under any circumstances, feel what somebody else is feeling. I just understand what they're feeling because I'm not an autist.
Am I the only one here? Enter back me up
Benjamin is wrong; you don't have to literally feel the same emotion as them at the same time to be empathetic, though you certainly can, and both are forms of empathy assuming you yourself have been in their very position.
If your friend got fired, and you've been fired before, you could empathize cognitively. You understand what it feels like to get fired. It doesn't mean you have to then get all depressed and act as though you too just got fired, it just means you understand.
If you haven't experienced being fired before, you still can obviously understand it would feel shitty, and assuming you feel bad for your friend, that would be sympathy.
Empathy = "I know those feels, bro. I've been there."
Sympathy = "I don't know what that's like but I'm sorry, bro."
That's my understanding anyway. -
2018-01-22 at 2:08 PM UTCHit someone in the shoulder with a hammer, then tell them you feel their pain.
