Putting shit back in your ass.

1. 2018-01-07 at 7:26 PM UTC

   #1
   

   FREEMYPEOPLE Yung Blood
   Whats the best way to return a turd to its maker?
   
   Sometimes you are out and about and it just isn't convenient to let one rip. So it would be nice if we could come up with a plan to put the feces back in its hole, and carry it until you are at a good rest spot.
2. 2018-01-07 at 7:30 PM UTC

   #2
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   Are you shitfucker
3. 2018-01-07 at 7:32 PM UTC

   #3
   

   FREEMYPEOPLE Yung Blood
   Do you think like some kind of big syringe? Or maybe like a piston ring compressor and a matching dowel rod would work to push it back with little mess
4. 2018-01-07 at 7:43 PM UTC

   #4
   The Self Taught Man Black Hole
   That's stupid. Use the tampon method; stuff your shit into a cardboard tube like a toilet roll tube, stuff the tube up your ass, then pull the tube out while pushing on the shit in the middl, and your ass will close around it.
5. 2018-01-07 at 8:09 PM UTC

   #5
   

   benny vader YELLOW GHOST

   Originally posted by FREEMYPEOPLE Whats the best way to return a turd to its maker?

   
   load it back into your mouth.
6. 2018-01-07 at 8:12 PM UTC

   #6
   

   mmQ Lisa Turtle
   Staple a skin pocket to your butthole to catch the dumplets then remove and discard at your convenience.
7. 2018-01-07 at 8:19 PM UTC

   #7
   RestStop Space Nigga
   I always wondered what shitting in someone else's ass was like. I think that should be a band name..."And here the act you've all been waiting for..hailing all the way from Los Angeles, California *drum roll* "Shitting...IN...REVERSE!"
8. 2018-01-07 at 8:24 PM UTC

   #8
   

   -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
   Funnels are your friend.
9. 2018-01-07 at 9:49 PM UTC

   #9
   

   infinityshock Black Hole

   Originally posted by RestStop "Shitting…IN…REVERSE!"

   
   that entails attaching some means of positive-pressure to ones asshole whereupon the shit ejects from their mouth.
10. 2018-01-07 at 10:08 PM UTC

    #10
    

    SpectraL- Houston [stanchly box my garamycin]
    Wrong subforum. Reported.
11. 2018-01-07 at 10:58 PM UTC

    #11
    

    FREEMYPEOPLE Yung Blood

    Originally posted by SpectraL- Wrong subforum. Reported.

    
    i disagree about being in the wrong section.
    
    HAVE A BLESSED DAY
12. 2018-01-08 at 2:03 AM UTC

    #12
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by benny vader load it back into your mouth.

    
    This is also a good way to save on food expenses. It's full of protein and vitamin B12 as well. In North Korea they call it Second Harvest, and it is regarded as a delicacy.
13. 2018-01-08 at 2:06 AM UTC

    #13
    

    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]
    I don't get how people lap out each other's ass cracks and don't get really sick with a slew of diseases.
14. 2018-01-08 at 2:12 AM UTC

    #14
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by -SpectraL I don't get how people lap out each other's ass cracks and don't get really sick with a slew of diseases.

    
    That doesn't really make sense. There is no way to get a disease from a healthy human being.
    
    People are taught to wash their hands after the use the bathroom because the average person is too dumb to avoid pissing on them.
15. 2018-01-08 at 2:23 AM UTC

    #15
    

    -SpectraL coward [the spuriously bluish-lilac bushman]

    Originally posted by Issue313 That doesn't really make sense. There is no way to get a disease from a healthy human being.
    
    People are taught to wash their hands after the use the bathroom because the average person is too dumb to avoid pissing on them.

    
    The same people who wash their hands are licking out dirty asses, and you don't see a contradiction.
16. 2018-01-08 at 3:21 AM UTC

    #16
    

    infinityshock Black Hole

    Originally posted by Issue313 That doesn't really make sense. There is no way to get a disease from a healthy human being.
    
    People are taught to wash their hands after the use the bathroom because the average person is too dumb to avoid pissing on them.

    
    theres no such thing as a 'healthy human being'
    
    every person has such a variety of microorganisms (bacteria...viruses...etc etc) living inside them in a way as unique as fingerprints. a microorganism that is 'healthy' in person-a could cause person-g to get a terminal illness. also...a 'healthy' person may be carrying a microorganism that is non-threatening to them but may be infectious in a way that causes another person to get sick.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

    • aldra
17. 2018-01-08 at 3:23 AM UTC

    #17
    

    Zanick motherfucker [my p.a. supernal goa]
    i believe you are falling prey to a binary mode of thinking which is not rooted in fact
18. 2018-01-08 at 3:29 AM UTC

    #18
    RestStop Space Nigga

    Originally posted by infinityshock theres no such thing as a 'healthy human being'
    
    every person has such a variety of microorganisms (bacteria…viruses…etc etc) living inside them in a way as unique as fingerprints. a microorganism that is 'healthy' in person-a could cause person-g to get a terminal illness. also…a 'healthy' person may be carrying a microorganism that is non-threatening to them but may be infectious in a way that causes another person to get sick.

    
    I think a lot of it has to do with exposure/immune system building. There are un contacted tribes so disconnected from the world that a common cold that would barely phase me or you would kill them within a week.
19. 2018-01-08 at 3:42 AM UTC

    #19
    The Self Taught Man Black Hole

    Originally posted by Zanick i believe you are falling prey to a binary mode of thinking which is not rooted in fact

    
    It's rooted in fact (everything can be considered in binary terms) but it's generalizable to the point of being useless, as we can see here.
20. 2018-01-08 at 3:50 AM UTC

    #20
    

    infinityshock Black Hole

    Originally posted by RestStop I think a lot of it has to do with exposure/immune system building. There are un contacted tribes so disconnected from the world that a common cold that would barely phase me or you would kill them within a week.

    
    that too.
    
    even an individual person with its own unique microbiology can get deathly ill from its own indigenous type of microorganism unintentionally being relocated from one point on/in their body to a different one.