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life is horrific
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2017-12-31 at 12:30 PM UTCi hate this
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2017-12-31 at 12:38 PM UTCIt's not too bad. 2017 was the best year I've had ever. I've had some hardcore shitty years though where I wanted to die. Why do you want to die, Enter?
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2017-12-31 at 12:56 PM UTC
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2017-12-31 at 12:58 PM UTC
Originally posted by Grimace It's not too bad. 2017 was the best year I've had ever. I've had some hardcore shitty years though where I wanted to die. Why do you want to die, Enter?
its just meaningless. my existential dread gets worse every year. i passed out the other day and thought i was dying, and that didn't help. i just hate living and i feel so fucking alone and scared, if i'm being honest.
just had to take another valium, sort of having a panic attack right now. don't want to become dependent on this shit but ugh. -
2017-12-31 at 12:58 PM UTC
Originally posted by Hikikomori-Yume Were you living under a rock?
No, I was starting my very first business with my wife. I quadrupled my income, doing what I love. I went on 3 trips this year. Had an awesome Christmas totally paid for by the business credit card rewards. Were you living under a rock?The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-12-31 at 1 PM UTC
Originally posted by Enter its just meaningless. my existential dread gets worse every year. i passed out the other day and thought i was dying, and that didn't help. i just hate living and i feel so fucking alone and scared, if i'm being honest.
just had to take another valium, sort of having a panic attack right now. don't want to become dependent on this shit but ugh.
Do you hate living because you feel like you're not living up to your potential or you're not fulfilling your life goals? -
2017-12-31 at 1:03 PM UTC
Originally posted by Grimace Do you hate living because you feel like you're not living up to your potential or you're not fulfilling your life goals?
was just thinking about it, that might have something to do with it. every day's the fucking same. every day is meaningless.
it's like im living in hell. this is hell isn't it. i've died and this is hell. -
2017-12-31 at 1:08 PM UTC
Originally posted by Enter was just thinking about it, that might have something to do with it. every day's the fucking same. every day is meaningless.
it's like im living in hell. this is hell isn't it. i've died and this is hell.
Are you/have you gone/going to college? Do you work? What do you do? Is that what you want to do? What do you want to do? -
2017-12-31 at 1:08 PM UTCif i didn't have any family, i'm 99% sure i'd kill myself right now. but i dont want to make them sad. they are my shackles.
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2017-12-31 at 1:10 PM UTC
Originally posted by Enter if i didn't have any family, i'm 99% sure i'd kill myself right now. but i dont want to make them sad. they are my shackles.
Is it that bad? Take a moment and think about that for a second. Is life really so bad right now that it's worthy of ending it if not for your family? I somehow doubt that it is. -
2017-12-31 at 1:12 PM UTC
Originally posted by Grimace Are you/have you gone/going to college? Do you work? What do you do? Is that what you want to do? What do you want to do?
i want to do creative stuff but it's not feasible really. i'm hoping my hobbies can turn into a career. other than that im just working an awful shitty dead-end retail job that makes me want to die and going to college for engineering (which keeps my brain occupied, but I don't LIKE it).
maybe in 2018 instead of spending all my free time doing nothing i should spend it doing creative things and making stuff. i dont know. i am so fucking depressed. when will this valium kick in. -
2017-12-31 at 1:17 PM UTC
Originally posted by Enter i want to do creative stuff but it's not feasible really. i'm hoping my hobbies can turn into a career. other than that im just working an awful shitty dead-end retail job that makes me want to die and going to college for engineering (which keeps my brain occupied, but I don't LIKE it).
maybe in 2018 instead of spending all my free time doing nothing i should spend it doing creative things and making stuff. i dont know. i am so fucking depressed. when will this valium kick in.
you remind me of a chick i know. shes the exact same way...and says the exact same shit...'cept she lives with her mother and does absolutely nothing productive in life...and blames everyone else for her shit existence. -
2017-12-31 at 1:17 PM UTC
Originally posted by Grimace Is it that bad? Take a moment and think about that for a second. Is life really so bad right now that it's worthy of ending it if not for your family? I somehow doubt that it is.
every day is a nightmare. and i am just a shitty, messed up, monster of a person. i can't really think of any reason to keep on living besides my family, and i'm trying. i hate this world. or maybe i have a chemical imbalance. -
2017-12-31 at 1:18 PM UTCkick in valium, help me relax. :'(
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2017-12-31 at 1:29 PM UTCah... goodbye mental pain. why can't i achieve this normally? :( why am i so fucked up?
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2017-12-31 at 1:43 PM UTC
Originally posted by Enter i want to do creative stuff but it's not feasible really. i'm hoping my hobbies can turn into a career. other than that im just working an awful shitty dead-end retail job that makes me want to die and going to college for engineering (which keeps my brain occupied, but I don't LIKE it).
maybe in 2018 instead of spending all my free time doing nothing i should spend it doing creative things and making stuff. i dont know. i am so fucking depressed. when will this valium kick in.
Engineering...that's pretty awesome. Why did you get into it if you didn't LIKE IT though?
Originally posted by Enter every day is a nightmare. and i am just a shitty, messed up, monster of a person. i can't really think of any reason to keep on living besides my family, and i'm trying. i hate this world. or maybe i have a chemical imbalance.
I think everyone on this website is a shitty, monster of a person. Truly. I know I certainly am, but I manage. So why the need to end it? Pffft.
Originally posted by Enter ah… goodbye mental pain. why can't i achieve this normally? :( why am i so fucked up?
You can. -
2017-12-31 at 1:45 PM UTCi did it for money and coz parents wanted me to
how do i achieve it normally then
man i love valium. i feel so good right now. :) and remember before when i was wanting to kill myself? sucks that life will go back to normal tomorrow morning.... -
2017-12-31 at 1:51 PM UTC
Originally posted by Enter i did it for money and coz parents wanted me to
how do i achieve it normally then
man i love valium. i feel so good right now. :) and remember before when i was wanting to kill myself? sucks that life will go back to normal tomorrow morning….
You should never go on to do something that defines the rest of your life based on how much money you can make doing it or what your parents wanted you to do. Doing that, you will live a life of misery and never be happy. Ever. Go to school for what YOU want to do. I like computers. That was my hobby and passion. I made it my profession. It doesn't feel like I am going to work everyday, because I truly enjoy my job (and I make good money doing it). Find something that you enjoy that can bring you the same.
How can you achieve happiness normally? Well, it starts with living a life you enjoy. If you're going to school for something you, yourself, didn't WANT. That creates a bed of disdain. Do the things you like to do to. Go to school for what you like to do. Get a job doing what you like to do. Do you like animals? Volunteer at an animal shelter. You'd be surprised how rewarding that is.The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire! -
2017-12-31 at 2:01 PM UTC
Originally posted by Grimace You should never go on to do something that defines the rest of your life based on how much money you can make doing it or what your parents wanted you to do. Doing that, you will live a life of misery and never be happy. Ever. Go to school for what YOU want to do. I like computers. That was my hobby and passion. I made it my profession. It doesn't feel like I am going to work everyday, because I truly enjoy my job (and I make good money doing it). Find something that you enjoy that can bring you the same.
How can you achieve happiness normally? Well, it starts with living a life you enjoy. If you're going to school for something you, yourself, didn't WANT. That creates a bed of disdain. Do the things you like to do to. Go to school for what you like to do. Get a job doing what you like to do. Do you like animals? Volunteer at an animal shelter. You'd be surprised how rewarding that is.
thanks. i'll tell you one thing grimace. i don't like being a bad person. i wish i was a good person. it goes against everything i believe in philosophically and logically, but i hate being "bad". -
2017-12-31 at 2:13 PM UTC
Originally posted by Enter its just meaningless. my existential dread gets worse every year. i passed out the other day and thought i was dying, and that didn't help. i just hate living and i feel so fucking alone and scared, if i'm being honest.
just had to take another valium, sort of having a panic attack right now. don't want to become dependent on this shit but ugh.
Why did you pass out?
Do you have health issues?
