Why did mohammed ban gambling?

1. 2024-09-10 at 8:09 PM UTC

   #21
   

   ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Black Hole
   A Muslim and a Jew walk into a bar...
2. 2024-09-10 at 11:02 PM UTC

   #22
   

   the man who put it in my hood Black Hole [miraculously counterclaim my golf]

   Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ A Muslim and a Jew walk into a bar…

   
   They should probably leave, drinking is a sin in both those religions
3. 2024-09-10 at 11:23 PM UTC

   #23
   

   ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Black Hole

   Originally posted by the man who put it in my hood They should probably leave, drinking is a sin in both those religions

   
   Hard liquor isn't kosher enough for them, eh?
4. 2024-09-11 at 3:49 AM UTC

   #24
   

   Speedy Parker Black Hole
   A NAZI, Imperial Japanese, and Italian fascist soldier walked into a BAR.
   
   They each got a round.
5. 2024-09-11 at 3:51 AM UTC

   #25
   

   ner vegas African Astronaut
   a Muslim walks into Pulse nightclub
   
   shots for everyone!
   The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!

   • Speedy Parker
6. 2024-09-11 at 4:44 AM UTC

   #26
   

   ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Black Hole
   A Mexican walks into a bar...
   
   ... pushing a lawn mower.
7. 2024-09-11 at 3:59 PM UTC

   #27
   

   the man who put it in my hood Black Hole [miraculously counterclaim my golf]

   Originally posted by Speedy Parker A NAZI, Imperial Japanese, and Italian fascist soldier walked into a BAR.
   
   They each got a round.

   
   They must have been thirsty!
   
   

   Originally posted by ner vegas a Muslim walks into Pulse nightclub
   
   shots for everyone!

   
   They must have all been thirsty
   
   
   
   

   Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ A Mexican walks into a bar…
   
   … pushing a lawn mower.

   
   He must have been thirsty
8. 2024-09-11 at 4 PM UTC

   #28
   

   Speedy Parker Black Hole

   Originally posted by the man who put it in my hood They must have been thirsty!
   
   
   
   They must have all been thirsty
   
   
   
   
   
   He must have been thirsty

   
   You must have thought this was funny.
9. 2024-09-11 at 8:07 PM UTC

   #29
   

   Fluttershy Short Bussy

   Originally posted by the man who put it in my hood They must have been thirsty!
   
   
   
   They must have all been thirsty
   
   
   
   
   
   He must have been thirsty

   
   That was the funniest shit I ever read
10. 2024-09-11 at 8:30 PM UTC

    #30
    

    the man who put it in my hood Black Hole [miraculously counterclaim my golf]

    Originally posted by Speedy Parker You must have thought this was funny.

    
    
    
    

    Originally posted by Fluttershy That was the funniest shit I ever read

    
    THIS IS A BAR NOT A DAMN COMEDY CLUB!!!
11. 2024-09-11 at 8:52 PM UTC

    #31
    

    ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Black Hole
    A sacred cow and a banned pig walk into a bar...
12. 2024-09-11 at 8:53 PM UTC

    #32
    

    Elbow African Astronaut

    Originally posted by ner vegas what do you call a Muslim who drinks for the first time?
    
    Hamed
    
    what do you call a Muslim who drinks all night?
    
    Mohammed

    
    u no what they say mo' hammed mo' problems ha ha ha ha ha
13. 2024-09-11 at 8:54 PM UTC

    #33
    

    Speedy Parker Black Hole
    Altfest
14. 2024-09-11 at 9:15 PM UTC

    #34
    

    ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Black Hole
    A Muslim dies and finds himself before the Pearly Gates...
    He is very excited, as all his life he has longed to meet the Prophet Mohammed.
    
    Having arrived at the Gates of Heaven, he meets a man with a beard.
    
    "Are you Mohammed?" he asks.
    
    "No, my son. I am Peter. Mohammed is higher up." And he points to a ladder that rises into the clouds.
    
    Delighted that Mohammed should be higher than Peter, he climbs the ladder in great strides, climbs through the clouds, coming to a room where he meets another bearded man.
    
    He asks again, "Are you Mohammed?"
    
    "No, I am Moses. Mohammed is higher still."
    
    Exhausted, but with a heart full of joy he continues to climb the ladder and, yet again, he discovers an even larger room where he meets another man with a beard.
    
    Full of hope, he asks again, "Are you Mohammed?"
    
    "No, I am Jesus... You will find Mohammed higher up."
    
    Mohammed higher than Jesus!
    
    The poor man can hardly contain his delight and climbs and climbs, ever higher.
    
    Once again he reaches a larger room where he meets a man with a beard and repeats his question:
    
    
    "Are you Mohammed?" he gasps as he is, by now, totally out of breath from all his
    climbing.
    
    "No my son.....I am God. But you look exhausted. Would you like a coffee?"
    
    "Yes, please!" said the man.
    
    God looks behind him, claps his hands and calls out: "Hey Mohammed, two coffees!"
15. 2024-09-11 at 9:56 PM UTC

    #35
    

    the man who put it in my hood Black Hole [miraculously counterclaim my golf]

    Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ A sacred cow and a banned pig walk into a bar…

    
    they must have been thirsty
    
    
    
    

    Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ A Muslim dies and finds himself before the Pearly Gates…
    He is very excited, as all his life he has longed to meet the Prophet Mohammed.
    
    Having arrived at the Gates of Heaven, he meets a man with a beard.
    
    "Are you Mohammed?" he asks.
    
    "No, my son. I am Peter. Mohammed is higher up." And he points to a ladder that rises into the clouds.
    
    Delighted that Mohammed should be higher than Peter, he climbs the ladder in great strides, climbs through the clouds, coming to a room where he meets another bearded man.
    
    He asks again, "Are you Mohammed?"
    
    "No, I am Moses. Mohammed is higher still."
    
    Exhausted, but with a heart full of joy he continues to climb the ladder and, yet again, he discovers an even larger room where he meets another man with a beard.
    
    Full of hope, he asks again, "Are you Mohammed?"
    
    "No, I am Jesus… You will find Mohammed higher up."
    
    Mohammed higher than Jesus!
    
    The poor man can hardly contain his delight and climbs and climbs, ever higher.
    
    Once again he reaches a larger room where he meets a man with a beard and repeats his question:
    
    
    "Are you Mohammed?" he gasps as he is, by now, totally out of breath from all his
    climbing.
    
    "No my son…..I am God. But you look exhausted. Would you like a coffee?"
    
    "Yes, please!" said the man.
    
    God looks behind him, claps his hands and calls out: "Hey Mohammed, two coffees!"

    
    He must have been thirsty!
16. 2024-09-11 at 10:10 PM UTC

    #36
    

    ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Black Hole

    Originally posted by the man who put it in my hood they must have been thirsty

    
    Imagine loving hamburgers, but hating hotdogs.
17. 2024-09-12 at 12:04 AM UTC

    #37
    Charles Ex Machina Space Nigga
    a man and a cane walk into a bar .....
18. 2024-09-12 at 12:06 AM UTC

    #38
    

    Speedy Parker Black Hole

    Originally posted by Charles Ex Machina a man and a cane walk into a bar …..

    
    4 people hide from him for a year...
    
    
19. 2024-09-12 at 1:22 AM UTC

    #39
    

    ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Black Hole

    Originally posted by Speedy Parker 4 people hide from him for a year…
    
    

    
    You hid in the Wile E. Coyote.
20. 2024-09-12 at 2:54 AM UTC

    #40
    

    Speedy Parker Black Hole

    Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ You hid in the Wile E. Coyote.

    
    Your facts are crossed just like your eyes.