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Isolation
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2024-02-12 at 12:56 PM UTCWhen I was 22, that's when I hit peak isolation, the whole year and not a soul to talk to. In truth I haven't had friends irl since I was 18, there'd still be people coming and going and meeting people off the internet so it's not like I haven't socialised. It's my fault because I never made an effort to make friends and I still don't really want them irl. But all this means I'm not normal, I started thinking that people weren't real. What happened when I was 22 is a cloud hanging over my life because how can I ever be happy when I know hell exists? I remember going to a psychiatrist just to make sure I was okay, I thought I couldn't be after that isolation. She said I was sound, that I couldn't go crazy because I'm a critical thinker. I think I'm interesting enough to entertain myself and that's what I've been doing the past year, literally only been talking to myself. I don't have a single friend online or irl. I think this is going to affect my mental health, that it can't go on for another few months. I've made arrangements for social activities but I feel like I'm still going to hate everyone. Spectral mentioned I should read books but I don't have time to read literature at this point.
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2024-02-12 at 12:59 PM UTC
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2024-02-12 at 1:01 PM UTCI have a lot of friends, but they don't really matter. What really matters is having best friends. Those are your true friends, who have your back through the good and the bad. But like you, I can entertain myself just fine. I'd decline to hang out with friends just so I could stay at home. I prefer being indoors, actually. I don't need any friends, but it's nice to hang out every now and then. Otherwise, isolating yourself on purpose can affect your socializing skills. Extremely negatively. It did, for me. I used to be a lot more social during high school, it's also when I had the most friends. But then after high school, I became a NEET and I got used to staying at home instead of being outside everyday with my friends like I used to. Good times, but I also have no desire to socialize either. I prefer keeping to myself but I understand I can't do that.
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2024-02-12 at 1:01 PM UTC
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2024-02-12 at 1:03 PM UTC
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2024-02-12 at 1:10 PM UTC
Originally posted by Michael Myers I have a lot of friends, but they don't really matter. What really matters is having best friends. Those are your true friends, who have your back through the good and the bad. But like you, I can entertain myself just fine. I'd decline to hang out with friends just so I could stay at home. I prefer being indoors, actually. I don't need any friends, but it's nice to hang out every now and then. Otherwise, isolating yourself on purpose can affect your socializing skills. Extremely negatively. It did, for me. I used to be a lot more social during high school, it's also when I had the most friends. But then after high school, I became a NEET and I got used to staying at home instead of being outside everyday with my friends like I used to. Good times, but I also have no desire to socialize either. I prefer keeping to myself but I understand I can't do that.
I don't think it's affected my socialising skills, I can be an extrovert when I do hang out with people irl. Ig that's odd, that coming out of isolation my socialising skills got better. Ig I felt more mature than other people because of all the stuff I'd gone through, more confident in who I am. It feels a bit superficial though. -
2024-02-12 at 1:11 PM UTC
Originally posted by Kafka I don't think it's affected my socialising skills, I can be an extrovert when I do hang out with people irl. Ig that's odd, that coming out of isolation my socialising skills got better. Ig I felt more mature than other people because of all the stuff I'd gone through, more confident in who I am. It feels a bit superficial though.
That's nice, good to know it's not always negative then. Consider yourself lucky! -
2024-02-12 at 1:16 PM UTCI had an adult phase when I was 19-21, was cultured, then came the trainwreck phase so I had all these secrets and it made me feel mysterious.
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2024-02-12 at 1:17 PM UTC
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2024-02-12 at 1:46 PM UTCi wonder what her penis pussy looks like
and then I cum and don't wonder anymore for a few hours and then the wonder grows like a wonder tree that sprouts fruits of rape and molestation -
2024-02-12 at 2:06 PM UTC
Originally posted by Kafka When I was 22, that's when I hit peak isolation, the whole year and not a soul to talk to. In truth I haven't had friends irl since I was 18, there'd still be people coming and going and meeting people off the internet so it's not like I haven't socialised. It's my fault because I never made an effort to make friends and I still don't really want them irl. But all this means I'm not normal, I started thinking that people weren't real. What happened when I was 22 is a cloud hanging over my life because how can I ever be happy when I know hell exists? I remember going to a psychiatrist just to make sure I was okay, I thought I couldn't be after that isolation. She said I was sound, that I couldn't go crazy because I'm a critical thinker. I think I'm interesting enough to entertain myself and that's what I've been doing the past year, literally only been talking to myself. I don't have a single friend online or irl. I think this is going to affect my mental health, that it can't go on for another few months. I've made arrangements for social activities but I feel like I'm still going to hate everyone.
I've been the same way. As soon as I graduated HS I lost all of my IRL friends except for 1, now I don't have any. Unlike you though I do want friends, but I just don't want to go through the very painful process of meeting new people/ being rejected, so I isolate myself not speaking to anyone IRL for days or weeks at a time.
Originally posted by Kafka Spectral mentioned I should read books but I don't have time to read literature at this point.
Aren't you unemployed? What else do you have better to do if so? -
2024-02-12 at 2:13 PM UTCI spent an entire summer not talking to anyone once
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2024-02-12 at 2:16 PM UTC
Originally posted by Kingoffrogs I've been the same way. As soon as I graduated HS I lost all of my IRL friends except for 1, now I don't have any. Unlike you though I do want friends, but I just don't want to go through the very painful process of meeting new people/ being rejected, so I isolate myself not speaking to anyone IRL for days or weeks at a time.
Aren't you unemployed? What else do you have better to do if so?
I'm studying atm and in my free time I am also learning hacking. But I'm grateful for all the time I had to read literature because that's what builds your personality and after the age of 30 you can't change that. I'm glad I was interested in literature and not computers. -
2024-02-12 at 2:17 PM UTC
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2024-02-12 at 2:20 PM UTC
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2024-02-12 at 2:20 PM UTCThe summer when I was 16 I didn't go out once. I just stayed in my room reading books.
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2024-02-12 at 2:23 PM UTC
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2024-02-12 at 2:25 PM UTCOK I did go out once to meet my friends but had to go home because my mum was phoning and driving around looking for me.
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2024-02-12 at 2:29 PM UTC
Originally posted by Kafka The summer when I was 16 I didn't go out once. I just stayed in my room reading books.
For college, I have to read two books this semester. The last time I read a book was probably over a decade ago, in high school. Currently, I have to read a fictional book taking place before and during WW 1. It's got 424 pages. I'm at page 100 now. Deadline is 26 February. It's an LGBT+ book. Not surprising they're making us read this, colleges are liberal breeding grounds. Personally I don't mind reading it, if I can be honest. It's for my British Literature class. -
2024-02-12 at 2:30 PM UTCIt's called In Memoriam.