2023-08-18 at 3:38 PM UTC
Why did humpty dumpty push his girlfriend off the wall?
He wanted to see her crack.
2023-08-18 at 3:47 PM UTC
You know why Hitler shot himself? He got the gas bill
2023-08-18 at 3:58 PM UTC
Dude walks into a pub
"Barman, give me a pint of ale and a ham sandwich"
Barman gives the man his requested items
dude picks up the ham sandwich, puts it on top of his head, downs the beer in one slug and walks out
Next day the dude shows up again..
"Barman, give me a pint of ale and a ham sandwich"
Barman gives the man his requested items
dude once again picks up the ham sandwich, puts it on top of his head, downs the beer in one slug and walks out
This goes on everyday for the rest of the week.
Friday comes along and the dude appears again...
"Barman, give me a pint of ale and a ham sandwich"
Barman says "Sorry we are all out of Ham sandwiches, we have cheese sandwiches though"
The dudes says "Ok give me a pint of ale and a cheese sandwich"
As expected the dude puts the cheese sandwich on his head, downs the beer in one and then gets up to leave.
The Barman stops him..."hold on mate, I've got to ask...why do you have a cheese sandwich on your head"
The dude looks around and says "Because you were out of ham"...and leaves.
2023-08-18 at 4:28 PM UTC
POLECAT
POLECAT is a motherfucking ferret
[my presentably immunised ammonification]
trying to get paid from overseas,, its not that easy if ur computer and smart phone illiterate, fuk I had to respell illiterate 3 times to get it rite
2023-08-18 at 4:40 PM UTC
At dollar tree looking at Halloween decorations
2023-08-18 at 5:03 PM UTC
Just got home putting stuff up ❤️
2023-08-18 at 5:38 PM UTC
Telling Butt about this crazy dream I had last night 😅
2023-08-18 at 5:47 PM UTC
Just got home putting stuff up my butt
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
2023-08-18 at 11:48 PM UTC
Originally posted by Kafka
Looking for a Sophie replacement.
You need a new pedophile??
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
2023-08-19 at 12:12 AM UTC
Maybe it's self-acceptance I need. I accept most of myself. Today I was thinking about my hair, I have hated it my whole life because it's so fine and that's sad, to hate a part of yourself your whole life. If I could wish for something it would be that I suddenly love my hair.
2023-08-19 at 12:36 AM UTC
Originally posted by the man who put it in my hood
im gonn aspam your pm ibnbox
I delete them all without reading.
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
2023-08-19 at 12:37 AM UTC
Originally posted by POLECAT
life without thoughts of you tied in my web of unwanted sexual perversions has left my dead inside
I think about poking your eyes out with a tea spoon, that way, with a smaller spoon they will get squished.
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
