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Folks I am the best chef of all time, I can cook anything

  1. #41
    MuscleStud69 African Astronaut
    What was the "best" Indian restaurant that you ever ate at and for what reason does that one stick out as the "best" in your mind? Was it the taste of the food? The location, ambience, decor and presentation? Where was it?

    Be specific but you don't need to say the exact restaurant or whatever, general location like country or whatever would be good tho.
  2. #42
    'The far pavilion" Swinton Manchester...circa 1989 or so...(it's been under different management and names multiple times since then.

    The food was good, the atmosphere was good and the memories were good as it was the goto place after the pubs closed and to take long legged birds too on "first dates" (though back then we didn't have "dates" in England, it was just called "goin out wiv wotsaname")

    Here's the street view 2008 (which is as far back as it goes)...It's already changed hands several times by then.

    https://www.google.com/maps/@53.5079026,-2.3321116,3a,75y,358.01h,74.49t/data=!3m7!1e1!3m5!1s97Nvbaev4xXlBfhbvjMlJA!2e0!5s20080801T000000!7i13312!8i6656

    That's also a new building..the original one looked much better and less "hole in the wall"
  3. #43
    Originally posted by MuscleStud69 Further proof you've never had a real korma (or anything from subcontinental cuisine) because only the whitified crap restaurants do that. They probably had Chicken Tikka Masala on the menu too.

    This really is productive, I think we are zeroing in on the precise reason your food opinions are so whack in real time.

    A real chef knows there isn't *1* way to serve a dish. And again...10s of thousands of restaurants around the world serve it with rice and naan...I've had curries in multiple countries and always had rice and naan with it.

    As for Korma I've had that in multiple countries too...It's just not my cup of tea, I had my last one here in the US about 5yrs ago and said "That's it nigga, no more Korma crap".

    As a side note on how chefs might prepare and serve dishes differently...back in England a chicken roganjosh is a common menu item..not long after I came to the US I was in an Indian restaurant here and wanted it and it wasn't on the menu...only lamb roganjosh was. I asked the waiter and he brought the chef out,t he chef says (indian fella)

    "Chicken is not cooked with a roganjosh sauce...only lamb, chicken is not good with it"

    I apparently embarrassed my wife (because she went on about it for years) by saying...

    "I'm british and chicken roganjosh is a common menu item over there so it goes fine with the sauce"

    He said "I'll make you one if you want it but I don't recommend it"

    He made it and it was delicious...even if he jizzed or spit in it and called me a white devil.
  4. #44
    D-Bonglord Tuskegee Airman
    Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Can you cook an armadillo?


    he cannot
  5. #45
    Crunchy on the outside, soft on the inside.
  6. #46
    Originally posted by D-Bonglord he cannot

    Supposedly, the best way to cook an armadillo is with a rock in the pot. Once the rock is tender, so is the armadillo.
  7. #47
    Use a sous vide.
  8. #48
    I was in a french restaurant once and there was a table of "common workmen" next to ours...

    Chicken Chasseur was on the menu....the waiter was going around the table of the workmen and he got to one particular brute and said "and you sir?"

    the brute said "Chicken Chaser please mate"

    I shook my head and (quietly) guffawed.

    HOWEVER...YEARS later...I found out Chasseur is the french word for "hunter"...so Chicken Chaser kind of fits too.
  9. #49
    MuscleStud69 African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson 'The far pavilion" Swinton Manchester…circa 1989 or so…(it's been under different management and names multiple times since then.

    The food was good, the atmosphere was good and the memories were good as it was the goto place after the pubs closed and to take long legged birds too on "first dates" (though back then we didn't have "dates" in England, it was just called "goin out wiv wotsaname")

    Here's the street view 2008 (which is as far back as it goes)…It's already changed hands several times by then.

    https://www.google.com/maps/@53.5079026,-2.3321116,3a,75y,358.01h,74.49t/data=!3m7!1e1!3m5!1s97Nvbaev4xXlBfhbvjMlJA!2e0!5s20080801T000000!7i13312!8i6656

    That's also a new building..the original one looked much better and less "hole in the wall"

    Manchester Indian, explains a lot lol
  10. #50
    MuscleStud69 African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson A real chef knows there isn't *1* way to serve a dish.

    Yeah actually there are 2 right ways to serve this particular dish (naan or rice), and one particularly wrong one (both).

    And again…10s of thousands of restaurants around the world serve it with rice and naan…I've had curries in multiple countries and always had rice and naan with it.

    Also serving either the naan or rice already dunked in the masala is honestly another mark of "low end, doesn't get it".

    The proportion of rice to masala is frankly nuts on most of those photos too. The masala is not like a soup you eat with a spoon and has some rice floating in it. Most of those look insanely saucy too.

    As for Korma I've had that in multiple countries too…It's just not my cup of tea, I had my last one here in the US about 5yrs ago and said "That's it nigga, no more Korma crap".

    Apparently you've had them from all the worst places so I guess you have an interesting pleb's good experience but it's worth making properly from scratch or boxed spices a couple times tbh.

    As a side note on how chefs might prepare and serve dishes differently…back in England a chicken roganjosh is a common menu item..not long after I came to the US I was in an Indian restaurant here and wanted it and it wasn't on the menu…only lamb roganjosh was. I asked the waiter and he brought the chef out,t he chef says (indian fella)

    "Chicken is not cooked with a roganjosh sauce…only lamb, chicken is not good with it"

    I apparently embarrassed my wife (because she went on about it for years) by saying…

    "I'm british and chicken roganjosh is a common menu item over there so it goes fine with the sauce"

    He said "I'll make you one if you want it but I don't recommend it"

    He made it and it was delicious…even if he jizzed or spit in it and called me a white devil.

    It's just like eating chicken in Peking sauce or some shit. Missing the point entirely. Duck has thicker skin with bigger fat deposits and can be crisped more effectively. I mean you can do it, but if you think you are basically eating remotely a similar thing then you just are not. Roghanjosh is absolutely kind blowing on lamb. It's a perfect medley of flavors and aromas. I've tried chicken roghanjosh too, it's not horrible but it's just not even close. That guy wasn't going to serve you something inedible but yeah it's a compromised dish that you ended up liking due to ignorance/having been to all the worst places.

    Actually maybe that was the one real place you went to, and you still steered him into your bad and white decision.

    That's fascinating you have like a significant breadth of only the worst knowledge informing consistently bad food opinions.
  11. #51
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson Imagine not making a Naanwich with yer curry and rice…imagine!

    You'd never make it on the "Curry mile" my lad.

    https://www.visitmanchester.com/things-to-see-and-do/the-curry-mile-p326621

    this is what a genuine meal looks like.

  12. #52
    Originally posted by MuscleStud69 Manchester Indian, explains a lot lol

    An Indian immigrant living in Manchester is the same as an Indian living in Indian except cleaner
  13. #53
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson An Indian immigrant living in Manchester is the same as an Indian living in Indian except cleaner

    not if hes a dalit.

    like op.
  14. #54
    Originally posted by MuscleStud69 Yeah actually there are 2 right ways to serve this particular dish (naan or rice), and one particularly wrong one (both).

    The 10s of thousands of google results say's your wrong

    ..and again a REAL chef knows there are MULTIPLE ways to serve/prepare a dish...he doesn't use recipes he's snagged off the internet




    Also serving either the naan or rice already dunked in the masala is honestly another mark of "low end, doesn't get it".



    What you yourself do with the sides has no baring on the quality of the dish. If I have a steak prepared by Gordon Ramsey and then smother it in Ketchup that doesn't lessen the steaks quality or preparation


    The proportion of rice to masala is frankly nuts on most of those photos too. The masala is not like a soup you eat with a spoon and has some rice floating in it. Most of those look insanely saucy too.

    Were are you getting your "opinion" from on all this? because the MAJORITY of results indicate YOU are wrong on this subject.



    Apparently you've had them from all the worst places so I guess you have an interesting pleb's good experience but it's worth making properly from scratch or boxed spices a couple times tbh.

    Sounds like you're the one getting it at the wrong places...after all you cited internet recipes for your korma
  15. #55
    MuscleStud69 African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson An Indian immigrant living in Manchester is the same as an Indian living in Indian except cleaner

    A Manchester Indian restaurant is always going to cater towards trash white British patrons who are universally regarded to have the worst culinary sensibilities on planet Earth yet are still the overwhelming majority of patrons.

    This is probably why you think dunking your naan and a little bit of rice in a big bowl of masala to serve at the same time makes sense to you for example.
  16. #56
    Originally posted by MuscleStud69 A Manchester Indian restaurant is always going to cater towards trash white British patrons who are universally regarded to have the worst culinary sensibilities on planet Earth yet are still the overwhelming majority of patrons.

    This is probably why you think dunking your naan and a little bit of rice in a big bowl of masala to serve at the same time makes sense to you for example.


    You're missing the fact I've had curries in MULTIPLE countries...over decades

    And your reading and comprehension skills need to be worked on...go back and read YOUR question regarding my favorite Indian restaurant..and WHY it is..then read my response stating WHY it is...the actual food wasn't the main focus
  17. #57
    Originally posted by MuscleStud69 This is probably why you think dunking your naan and a little bit of rice in a big bowl of masala to serve at the same time makes sense to you for example.

    Um btw, you don't "dunk" the naan...you use it to make a naanwich

    The fact you are completely unfamiliar with that idea shows your limited experience...the naan isn't used as a "mop".
  18. #58
    D-Bonglord Tuskegee Airman
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson Um btw, you don't "dunk" the naan…you use it to make a naanwich

    Yes this sounds very indian and not western influenced whatsoever
  19. #59
    MuscleStud69 African Astronaut
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson The 10s of thousands of google results say's your wrong

    Tens of thousands of results on Google also say that the COVID vaccine was safe and effective

    ..and again a REAL chef knows there are MULTIPLE ways to serve/prepare a dish…he doesn't use recipes he's snagged off the internet

    In fact skilled cookerists don't really use recipes, which is why I didn't even feel thr need to provide a recipe till you insisted and I didn't need any measured quantities for my korma for example.

    The best cookists simply learn the methodology behind various aspects of cooking and apply them, simply using recipes as a guide to refresh them in the specifics of what they're trying to accomplish (since the best cookers usually cook many different things).



    What you yourself do with the sides has no baring on the quality of the dish.

    They're not sides any more than the pasta is a "side" for a spaghetti sauce or bread is a "side" for a sandwich (it's actually the top and bottom stupid).

    They're integral parts of the dish because the sauce, masala or sandwiched assemblage are in no way meant to be consumed alone.

    And insofar as they are integral parts of the dish, drowning your rice and pre-sogging your naan and serving them together is the absolute wrong way to serve all three of them.

    Here's a normal, reasonable presentation of korma, both available to choose one from, on the sides but not because they're "sides":



    Here's another one, naan on the side but not because it's a side but because there's no reason to pre submerge and sog it.



    If I have a steak prepared by Gordon Ramsey and then smother it in Ketchup that doesn't lessen the steaks quality or preparation

    1. HAHAHAHA. This is proving my point beautifully.

    Yes even if you replaced "ketchup" with "motor oil" that wouldn't directly affect the underlying steak's quality, right?

    Certainly would be a wrong way to serve or eat a steak though.

    2. Gordon Ramsey is shit and doesn't know shit, it is like saying you got advice from Judge Judy and also further proves my point about you saying the whackest out-of-it stuff with confidence and no irony.

    Were are you getting your "opinion" from on all this? because the MAJORITY of results indicate YOU are wrong on this subject.

    Honestly your search algorithms and results have probably already been heavily tuned towards your whack pleb opinions.

    So it is not surprising that you've been mentally rabbit-holed like this if your source of validation for truth in the world is how many Google results you cursorily see while making unspecified searches.


    Sounds like you're the one getting it at the wrong places…after all you cited internet recipes for your korma

    Shan masalas have existed and provided masterclass traditional recipes since long before the Internet son.
  20. #60
    Originally posted by MuscleStud69 Tens of thousands of results on Google also say that the COVID vaccine was safe and effective



    Stick to your internet recipes "master chef"

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