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How I fit become more valuable asset for spy agencies?

  1. #1
    Ebele Obasanjo Yung Blood
    Me just sabi create di best alternative accounts for this website. I be like person wey dem born to do spy work. I go dey behave like di person wey I wan pretend to be, even di way wey I go take dey talk, I go adopt di culture, and even di geographical knowledge of di person wey I wan become. I dey do am because I dey enjoy am, but e no dey add anytin for my life as lawyer. But me sef think say I miss out well well because me, I dey socially awkward.
  2. #2
    Ebele Obasanjo Yung Blood
    No be fair thing. I dey feel say I get real talent for dis thing, but I no fit use am because I no follow di typical career path of spy and no intelligence agency fit sabi say I dey exist. And if dem sabi, dem fit think say I go be problem for dem. I feel say I fit be useful, but nobody dey take advantage of my usefulness.
  3. #3
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    don't sell your soul
  4. #4
    Meikai Heck This Schlong
    Originally posted by aldra don't sell your soul

    I'm interested in this too. Not that I'm OP, ha ha. That'd be silly. I don't think I could fit a Rabbi and a black man inside of me. Not at the same time. Unless they were the same person, but Rabbi T. Weed is definitely canonically white. Ha ha. But yeah how do I become spy? 'cause I find the same things fun that OP does... I think. Seriously what the fuck is this Jamaican patois ass shit, it is very hard to read.

    I'm a ginger tranny, I don't have a soul to sell. Our Jamaican friend here might be concerned for his soul but it's really not a concern for me.
  5. #5
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    you could probably join NAFO or some other faggot glow op and try to get headhunted from there

    I dunno about Canada but most of the west seems to have dropped most of their humint work and rely heavily on sigint so you're better off going through the regular channels to be an analyst or something.

    what would you offer them though? do you even talk to anyone offline
  6. #6
    Meikai Heck This Schlong
    Originally posted by aldra you could probably join NAFO or some other faggot glow op and try to get headhunted from there

    I dunno about Canada but most of the west seems to have dropped most of their humint work and rely heavily on sigint so you're better off going through the regular channels to be an analyst or something.

    what would you offer them though? do you even talk to anyone offline

    this is exactly the issue. i feel like there's a blend of retarded sigint/humint work that i would be a good fit for precisely because i don't talk to anyone offline. 4chan's weaponized autism as displayed during HWNDU capture the flag is a great example of an untapped resource of weird freaks who could probably be put to use because of their demonstrably excellent lateral thinking capabilities, but who are likely never to be headhunted because they're NEETs who fap to tranny porn all day.
  7. #7
    Meikai Heck This Schlong
    i don't think any intelligence agency as it exists today would see me as useful in my current state, but:
    1) they probably should
    2) just tell me what to do CIA-sama
  8. #8
    Meikai Heck This Schlong
    it involves the ability to improvise right? not quite in the same way special forces improvises, but intelligence work requires lateral thinking, the ability to make abstract connections. there's a lot of making do with what you have at your disposal - be that limited information or physical objects. i feel like intelligence agencies are really overlooking half the toolkit at their disposal (in terms of the populations they have to recruit from). spycraft should be a skilled trade, and i want to apprentice damn it.
  9. #9
    Meikai Heck This Schlong
    i shut down something analogous to numbers station one time by making a single youtube comment based on a schizo hunch. that is raw fucking talent, boiiiii. and it's gone unused.
  10. #10
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    I hate to break it to you but most internet degenerates running influence, astroturf, attack/dox etc. campaigns from their discord goon dens do it because they're neurotic, not because they're getting paid

    unless you've got something special to offer (not holes) even using you as a sleeve is risky business for any state actor; there's no way for them to judge risk/reward
  11. #11
    Meikai Heck This Schlong
    Originally posted by aldra unless you've got something special to offer (not holes) even using you as a sleeve is risky business for any state actor; there's no way for them to judge risk/reward

    i have holes, but also a willingness to put them in others
  12. #12
    Meikai Heck This Schlong
    give me the rifle CIA-san, i will do whatever you ask

  13. #13
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
    kill a CIA agent and turn up to Langley wearing his face, then they legally have to let you take his place
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  14. #14
    tranny hitmen hitwomen

  15. #15
    aldra JIDF Controlled Opposition
  16. #16
    Kafka sweaty
    If you're Jamaican, what does bobo mean?
  17. #17
    Kicking the Bobo shooting the Bobo

    I think they are supposed to be from Argentina
  18. #18
    Kafka sweaty
    Bobo means homeless person in Jamaica.
  19. #19
    Kafka sweaty
    I've thought about it because I have a Jodie Comer gift for accents but if I tried to deceive people I'd probably be bad at it and I don't want a job involving people.
  20. #20
    Originally posted by Meikai I don't think I could fit a Rabbi and a black man inside of me.

    take the rabbi with your ass and the nigger with your mouth.

    or vice versa if yiur asshole is bigger than yiur mouth.
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