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$1,000 for details on a certain gentleman

  1. Originally posted by frala *Googles did Brian Laundrie have an identical twin*

    Google doesn't know everything...the family kept it secret, separated them at birth and sent one to Albania, he then later returned to the US to try and find his real family and coincidentally setup camp in the same park Brian liked too...Twins often have such coincidences happen...it's some sort of subconscious mental link.

    Not being familiar with Florida's flora and fauna he was eaten by an alliGAYtor, hence the remains are not complete...Said asshole was too chewy for said alliGAYtor and it spat it out only to then be found by the police investigators.

    All this will be confirmed shortly.
  2. Originally posted by frala Oh yeah? Well then explain how the butthole they found is an exact match of Brian’s butthole.

    No two buttholes are the same, like snowflakes and fingerprints.
  3. Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ No two buttholes are the same, like snowflakes and fingerprints.

    There was no physical record of either buttholes configuration. Identification can only be made via DNA and with them being identical twins...
  4. Speedy Parker Black Hole
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson There was no physical record of either buttholes configuration. Identification can only be made via DNA and with them being identical twins…

    How many hours did you research buttholes?
  5. Originally posted by Speedy Parker How many hours did you research buttholes?

    The body part isn't relevant. The process is the same be it a butthole or an elbow.
  6. Speedy Parker Black Hole
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson The body part isn't relevant. The process is the same be it a butthole or an elbow.

    Answer the question.
  7. I didn't keep a time log.
  8. Speedy you take yourself way too seriously. Have you considered letting a woman stick something up your butthole?
  9. Originally posted by frala Speedy you take yourself way too seriously. Have you considered letting a woman stick something up your butthole?

    ..or a man?
  10. Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson There was no physical record of either buttholes configuration. Identification can only be made via DNA and with them being identical twins…

    Your butthole is printed minutes after you're born, they just don't tell you or your parents.
  11. Originally posted by frala …letting a woman stick something up your butthole?

    My legs would go stiff as chopsticks.
  12. Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Your butthole is printed minutes after you're born, they just don't tell you or your parents.

    Your butthole becomes more "snaggletoothed" the older you get, a birth print isn't going to look anything like a mature butthole that's been through the sexual ringer.
  13. Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson Your butthole becomes more "snaggletoothed" the older you get, a birth print isn't going to look anything like a mature butthole that's been through the sexual ringer.

    The star pattern is persistent.
  14. Speedy Parker Black Hole
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson Your butthole becomes more "snaggletoothed" the older you get, a birth print isn't going to look anything like a mature butthole that's been through the sexual ringer.

    You sure know a lot about buttholes
  15. Originally posted by ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The star pattern is persistent.

    No, the star pattern is a result of muscle contractions, those muscles grow as you age as well as strengthen (or weaken).

    A bunghole that's seen a lot of stretching or "red ass" inflammation changes the pattern permanently. Think of what your leather wallet looked like when it was new and think of what it looks like 5yrs later.
  16. Originally posted by Speedy Parker You sure know a lot about buttholes

    Yes, I live in America.
  17. Speedy Parker Black Hole
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson No, the star pattern is a result of muscle contractions, those muscles grow as you age as well as strengthen (or weaken).

    A bunghole that's seen a lot of stretching or "red ass" inflammation is changes the pattern permanently. Think of what your leather wallet looked like when it was new and think of what it looks like 5yrs later.

    ^Resident butthole expert folks.
  18. Originally posted by Speedy Parker ^Resident butthole expert folks.

    One day a woman will let you study hers and none of this will matter to you anymore.
  19. Speedy Parker Black Hole
    Originally posted by Jiggaboo_Johnson One day a woman will let you study hers and none of this will matter to you anymore.

    One day you will mature
  20. Originally posted by Speedy Parker One day you will mature

    A day I'm going to try and avoid as long as possible.
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
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