2021-08-10 at 4:19 PM UTC
*without
I meant to say without being sad
FUUUUUUCKKK
2021-08-10 at 6:39 PM UTC
RIPtotse
victim of incest
[my adversative decurved garbo]
Started to storm here.
Took a small nap it felt nice
Nothing like a good impromptu nap to recharge the batteries and chase those stressful thoughts away
Feels good man
It’s crazy how good being clean feels it’s insane I spent, sorry I mean, wasted all those years just chasing a good feeling when it was on the other side the whole time
It’s crazy and my mind isn’t totally fixed that’s for sure I still find myself thinking, it’s cool I could just eat a blue or maybe one bar and be fine, but then I remember even if you ate one for one day, it will just make it even easier to say yes at the wrong time and eat 10 bars and end up murder/rampage/suiciding everywhere while blackedout
So I give myself ten min and think about it for a minute and realize, ya wow that would probably be fucking bad, and I save my money
It’s the little wins everyday that add up to the big one
👨🏻🔬this has been a public service announcement from Dr. RIPtotse 🏩🧪👨🏻⚕️🧏🏻♂️🥼
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2021-08-10 at 6:41 PM UTC
thank you DR. RIPTOTSE!
You are an inspiration sir.
On a side note, I just walked exactly 4.20 miles. TEEEEE HEEE!!!!!!!
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2021-08-10 at 7:07 PM UTC
RIPtotse
victim of incest
[my adversative decurved garbo]
Lol dang ya I always bring water, got to be prepared!
2021-08-10 at 7:11 PM UTC
I don't know what the fuck I was thinking. I guess I didn't actually plan on walking that far and then it just sort of happened and by the time I realized I was thirsty I was way far away from any type of store so I had no choice but to SUFFER.
ALL IS WELL THOUGH.
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2021-08-10 at 7:17 PM UTC
Originally posted by RIPtotse
Started to storm here.
Took a small nap it felt nice
Nothing like a good impromptu nap to recharge the batteries and chase those stressful thoughts away
Feels good man
It’s crazy how good being clean feels it’s insane I spent, sorry I mean, wasted all those years just chasing a good feeling when it was on the other side the whole time
It’s crazy and my mind isn’t totally fixed that’s for sure I still find myself thinking, it’s cool I could just eat a blue or maybe one bar and be fine, but then I remember even if you ate one for one day, it will just make it even easier to say yes at the wrong time and eat 10 bars and end up murder/rampage/suiciding everywhere while blackedout
So I give myself ten min and think about it for a minute and realize, ya wow that would probably be fucking bad, and I save my money
It’s the little wins everyday that add up to the big one
👨🏻🔬this has been a public service announcement from Dr. RIPtotse 🏩🧪👨🏻⚕️🧏🏻♂️🥼
With age and experience comes wisdom. It's great that you are introspective, and trying to self-improve. Hope ur able to stay sober. I've tried many times and failed.
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2021-08-10 at 7:33 PM UTC
RIPtotse
victim of incest
[my adversative decurved garbo]
Ya it’s taken me years to achieve sobriety man and I’m not 100% there yet, I’m still on methadone, which I honestly consider medicine, because it saved my life a lot of times
And I smoke pot
But I don’t plan on being on methadone forever and plan on begenning my taper at the end of this school semester... gonna be low and slow might take a year or 2 to get totally off but that’s just fine I don’t mind at all
And I’ll probably never stop smoking bud although I would like to use a healthier option for cannabis consumption, I was using edibles a lot but I don’t trust the fucking jellies everyone had and the brownies and cookies I make build my tolerance quick
I’m gonna look into a nice vaporizer for me for Xmas maybe this year as long as I continue to be a good boy
And man I forgot how much money I actually have/can save when I don’t do drugs..
It’s fucking sick how much these scars on my body are worth
A whole new meaning to the man with the golden arm, which is a great movie you should all watch
I really want to read the book, I’m reading insomnia by Stephen king right now which is pretty good so far
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2021-08-10 at 7:53 PM UTC
aldra
JIDF Controlled Opposition
I mean me personally, I've never IV'd and I've never let my tolerance get as high as you or casper or others but for a long time I've felt like I need opioids to function correctly. if I stop, I get through the usual WDs but it's not long before I remember why I was doing them in the first place - I'm not sure if it's long-term withdrawal or if I'm just going back to the way I was, turbo-depressed, unable to sleep or concentrate properly etc.
low-dose (.5-1mg) bupe makes me feel 'normal' without getting messed up
2021-08-10 at 8:16 PM UTC
Sitting in my robe tokin a joint after a swim..deciding what to make for late lunch or dinner .. might go get something.. we’ll see ... *tokez*
