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Some piece of shit sideswiped and dented my new car

  1. #61
    Originally posted by Quick Mix Ready i would of got that second wife an old beat up running on its last leg and tell her, if you drive 3 years no accidents ill lease you a kia

    After we divorced I let her have that car, a few months later Hurricane Harvey happened. She send me an email subject line:

    "Fuck floods"

    She said she had gone out (during a category 4 hurricane) to get some laundry detergent and had driven into water. When she got out it was up to her chest and she had to swim out of there..."Will the car be ok?" she asked...I said "Sure! just use a hairdrier on it".
    The following users say it would be alright if the author of this post didn't die in a fire!
  2. #62
    Originally posted by stl1 Jiggle Booty used to like "Tits On A Stick" back when he was young and virile.

    Nowadays he settles for fat hos.

    I've retired from that life now, too much aggravation. So much easier AND CHEAPER going to the Asian spa
  3. #63
    stl1 Cum Lickin' Fagit
    Me love you long time.
  4. #64
    Quick Mix Ready Dark Matter [jealously defalcate my upanishad]
    i never did happy ending before. they wanted to legalize brothels like old days in san francisco. so the ladies can unionize, not get beat up by pimps but have security guys protecting. and be checked for HIV


    would be nice for old lonely guys without the hassle of getting scammed
  5. #65
    Originally posted by Quick Mix Ready i never did happy ending before. they wanted to legalize brothels like old days in san francisco. so the ladies can unionize, not get beat up by pimps but have security guys protecting. and be checked for HIV


    would be nice for old lonely guys without the hassle of getting scammed

    On my 18th Birthday 3 friends paid for me to go to "Daniella's" back in Hometown Manchester as a birthday treat.

    Very British with a real posh menu...during the rubdown...

    "Would you like to see the extras menu sir"
    "Don't mind if I do"

    1. Happy ending 25 quid
    2. Lathery shower and happy ending 30 quid
    3. oral delight 50 quid
    4. The works 100 quid

    etc..

    "hmmm yes I think I'd like the #2 please"
  6. #66
    Quick Mix Ready Dark Matter [jealously defalcate my upanishad]
    seems inexpensive or was this 1980s?
  7. #67
    Originally posted by Quick Mix Ready seems inexpensive or was this 1980s?

    80s.

    Back then you could go to the red light area and get it much cheaper.

    "Business sir?"
    "no thanks"
    "only 5 pounds for you"
    "go on then..."
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