2021-04-11 at 3:13 AM UTC
i watched it, was kinda surprising seeing what you look like. Didn't really understand much of it.
Kinda worried I have hikkimorri tendencies
2021-04-11 at 3:43 AM UTC
Not sure.
I talk to my rooommate, I have a couple friends, most of my social experiences are online. I don't ever leave my room except to purchase alcohol, make food in my communal kitchen (for myself, my roommate does not like to interact with me outside of doing shots of liquor and talkin for a few minutes) for myself, I leave the house to walk about 5-10 miles, I do this once or twice a week, I don't talk to anyone when I leave outside of the gas station where it's impersonal.
I spend all day reading, caring for my fish, my snakes. I always have my room door closed and spend msot of the day getting high on marijuana or drunk, reading, browsing this forum, browsing /pol/ and lately i've been trying to play more video games.
I have 8 friends that make a loose fitting social group, I see one of them the co president on Monday or Tuesday mornings for six hours. I also see another friend every week for one evening of drugs, card playing, and talking.
I see my mom once a week to help her with lifting stuff, play with her dog, etc.
The older I get the more nervous I am around other people and find myself retreating, in the hikkimorri style, into my own protective cell and letting less and less people in.
The homosexuality element has me meeting strangers for extremely short term relationships that have no deep or fulfilling value to my life.
I've pushed away most normal people due to my eccentricity and transient (wandering) lifestyle.
2021-04-11 at 3:45 AM UTC
I'm extremely polite to strangers or people I do business with or only know in a specific capacity, so they get this sense that I am this very intelligent, kind, mild mannered man.
Then we hang out two or three times, I get comfortable and I start saying crazy ass shit to people or like they realize details about me that don't come off well (Like my record) in light of what their expectation has become of their new friend.
Like when people find out I have three names, that's very off putting, how do I tell them, I actually have four?
2021-04-11 at 3:47 AM UTC
like ki have a golden microphone like you'd see in a shitty studio for making music, I can't sing, they ask why I have it, I say I make music for others, what kinda music
IDK nigga what the fuck?
I can't tell them Chicago style drill with me and my gangbanger friends as I work the beats and soundcloud premium for us?
2021-04-11 at 3:49 AM UTC
but like i really wanna get more active and meet new people but idk how to meet normal boring people and like what ar ewe gonan talk about