2021-03-08 at 6:22 AM UTC
aldra
JIDF Controlled Opposition
embedded bandcamp link
I don't want to lose my mind
I don't want to lose
I don't want
I don't
someone asked me to just tell everything that's inside
perfectly hidden deep in my mind
now if necessary
set the demons free/purify your soul/let this rage out
so help me here, I'm confused
you gave me life, I gave it to someone else
you took her away and made me stay
with this endless sadness in my whole body,
it hurts in every cell
now it's my mind that doesn't work so well -
if that's not lunacy, I guess it's hell
people smile at me but I'm not quite sure what they mean
do they wish me well, do they pity me
are they teasing me or planning to destroy me
I hate you but please stay
I love you but you'd better escape
trust me love, run, run far away
I can still feel the wind on my face,
sometimes I can even feel the taste
however there's a whole lot I can't
I can't stand, I need to recant
I can't even express myself
but since you took everything away there's not much to say
then who else would you take away?
well, well, you did it, now there's no replacement
just me and this void of psycho insanity
I just want you to remember
I didn't ask to be alive - what I did request was to rest
but as we can both see, there's no peace for me
to tell you the truth I'm not sure I want to remember
so erase them all, erase the memories of my life
this nihilist obsession with my joy, but especially the pain
take what's good and let the bad ones stay
this is the last thing I do before stop trying and give in
please please please be merciful
I don't want to lose my mind
I don't want to lose
I don't want
I don't
I - who am I?
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
2021-03-08 at 6:25 AM UTC
Get out of your feels Aldra. We all disassociate, it doesn’t make you special.
2021-03-08 at 2:11 PM UTC
Originally posted by aldra
what does this have to do with disassociation
the entire thing is about loss or lack of sovereignty
mind, body and spirit at the mercy of someone or something that doesn't even care enough about you to hate you
loss ?
did you ever have it ?
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
2021-03-08 at 7:01 PM UTC
Originally posted by Solstice
Are any of us
I'm pretty content most of the time, but noticed I have crazy mood swings lol, like I'll be fine then think of the past then just feel overpowering despair and sadness for a while and then snap out of it. Probably just me coming down when I do meth tbh.
The following users say it would be alright if the author of this
post didn't die in a fire!
