Thinking about the what could have been with my life, kind of depressing. I had a good talk the other day with my son's mom, showing me stuff from his baby things. She still had love letters in a notebook she wrote to me and had a picture of me, her and my mom at her graduation ceremony. Brought tears to my eyes, because my mom's been gone about 4 or 5 years now. I think about if I would have ever got on dope real bad if I stayed with my son's mom. She is a good woman and I used to be a pretty bad drunk, and she told me she was sorry she failed me. She wanted me to get help and get my life together. I really should have, it's one of the few regrets in life I struggle with, if I would have stopped drinking and treated her how she deserved and spent time in my son's life maybe I would feel fulfilled instead of empty. I would love to have a family, I'm to the point where I don't see it happening. I told her she didn't fail me but damn, that made me realize even though all the bullshit she went through with me she still cares about me in her own way.
Apologies for the wall of text, I just emotional dumped on y'all. I needed that 😊
2023-04-19 at 10:44 PM UTC
in
I ran outta weed / HAPPY 420
4/20 was a lot more exciting when I was a teenager/in my 20's. Now it's just another holiday that I don't celebrate 🤷
I've never had anyone beg for money at an ATM, and I've done plenty of the panhandling thing, we never flew or begged by ATMs, cops usually run them off quick. Now an ATM in a gas station or convenient store might get people hitting you up for change coming out though. Just be careful and alert at ATMs. That's a given anyways, if you get bad vibes go to a different one and if it's really an issue carry a knife and have it at the quick draw and ready when you're getting your money out. I might give someone a buck or two passing them at a corner and they're holding a sign but if a mother fucker seriously was begging me for money right after I left an ATM I would scoff at them. If they get aggressive well a puncture wound to the abdomen might change their mind. An email transfer also leaves a direct trail to the supplier so that's no question. An ATM leaves the trail at you and unless there's an ongoing investigation then it's no one's goddamn business where you chose to spend your $800 after you withdraw it from your own account.
Smoking a cigarette, having trouble falling asleep. Times like this make me nostalgic for my powerful narcotic abuse days